wonderful

Not only do I feel dead to my insides, but I am completely lost.

I can't find a surreal way to say what is on my mind.

Everyone keeps shoving my thoughts down my spine.

I wish I could see.

I wish I could tell.

Even peotry isn't big enough for my jump.

I want to be heard.

But everyones ears are closed.

I want to sing, but many years ago someone told me my voice is terrible.

I want to love, but someone misloved me.

I want to be kind, but I have anger problems.

I want to express, but there is always someone better taking the attention.

I want to be heard!

But here I am sitting alone in a field crying my eyes out.

My lungs piercing because air doesn't want to be its friend.

I'm alone for God sake.

I'm dying amongst the others.

My hands tremble and I can hardly see.

I have tried for over 5 years to stay alive.

I have tried to take it day by day.

I've always wondered if I would've taken my life that day and I would've regret it.

But now as I sit.

I think and ponder.

The only reason I want to stay is because of you.

You cared for me ever so sweetly.

I pray for when you come back.

2 years is hard enough.

I want to be in your arms again.

Life really sucked without you.

It really did.

I'm barley managing right now, but you know what?

I know every single moment of my life will mean something when you come home.

When you walk into my arms.

When I can kiss your lips.

When I can hold you hand and cry into your shoulder.

I love you.

I love you so much.

You've gotten me through hard times.

You've made me look for good.

I can trust you.

All the thoughts that pierce my head go down the drain.

It is like you know how to sooth me and make me feel safe.

With you my life isn't full of I can't do this.

It is I can.

I know with you everything is alright.

-art