That Word

is there a word 
for that painful sort of beauty 
when the grass is too green?

for fog-heavy mornings 
that shed their skin and slide
into soft black nights?

for summer days 
that ooze through time like 
honey down hot flesh, 
sticky and sweet?
 
for watching the sun go down 
on the crest of a country road 
throat heavy with the feeling 
of all that you’ve lost? 
 
i write to find that word. 
i want to taste it on my tongue.