Would You Rather?

It was like drowning in the darkness of the seemingly desolate ocean Lit only by the odd glimmer of moonlight The odd sparkle of his eyes I can swim, but I didn't want to I would've rather been completely deprived of oxygen Than had to bear the pain I would inevitably feel when it all came crashing down It was like we were falling But he had a parachute It was uncontrollable, I couldn't stop And despite my greatest fears, I was unable to cleanse my mind of his words But I would've rather heard his voice, even in my dreams Than had to bear the deafening silence without him It was like a nightmare But I couldn't wake up I felt paralysed Trapped by the warmth from his body as he held me But I would've rather failed to wake Than had to face reality alone It was the wrong time, he wasn't good for me And I didn't need him But my want for him was insuppressible All he was was a quantity of matter on an insignificant dot in the midst of entirety But to me he was entirety And I was lost in the midst of his eyes