Would you still love me?

Would you still love me?

If you knew who I was behind closed doors?

With tears cascading down my cheeks,

and mascara blurring my vision.

Would you still love me?

If you recognized the way I stare at empty walls,

and the way I look at you as if you were my last hope.

My only hope.

Would you still love me?

If you saw the way my eyes froze,

on the way I look at myself in the mirror, like

if the reflection of a monster was staring right back at me.

Would you still love me?

If you found out about the way I flinch when someone

decides to raise their voice at me or the way 

I can't trust what anybody says.

I hope you still love me, 

When you find out about how much I love you.

When you find out about how you are the sunlight

surrounded by my dimly lit stars, that makes them shine

just a bit brighter.

When you find out, that the trickle of vodka going down my throat,

is just a bit less toxic than thoughts of my mind.