Yearning for Perfection

4:32 am

I sit up and look around my room only to see different shades of black, each just as lonely as the next.

I’m convinced that sleep is only for those who have never been broken; like sleeping beauty only needs rest because she is beautiful.

I guess that’s why I always find myself awake at this time.


4:35 am

Ever since I was a child I knew that my mind would be a scary place to visit.

It never shuts down, never quiets.

I’m sorry that I force you to live in my thoughts,

I know it’s exhausting.


4:41 am

The night sky is my only company.

I find peace in the fact that it has an infinite number of secrets,

waiting to be discovered.

I suspect you do, too.


4:54 am

I am a walking pharmacy equipped with a personality made up of pills.

Trying to find a combination of chemicals that will formulate the perfect daughter.

No type of drug can meet your expectations.

I’m sorry that I’m not enough.

-h.h