You and I are as One

Without worrying

wanting more and more

pleased, that time allowed me

this outer layer skinned and shorn

finally is this pallidness, precisely peeled

packaged, and then neatly put away…

Allowing me, to now concentrate, to

initiate the whole consciousness

of my inner shapes and forms

surprisingly supple, and red apple

fresh, this flesh, this flame, this physical

reality of the each and every one of US…

Then, awareness sets itself in, to this totality

this surreal and abstract moving moment’s,

comedy, raising within me a rasping, gasp

that hysterical laugh, that past processed

improbable, exploding into screaming pain…

What a shame it is, I boldly think, that

“love”, of self or of others, does not

induce such extenuatingly caustic

emotional tense and complaint…

Too late to unpack that put away

flesh, that flaccid mess of what was

the previous visual me; indeed the thought

of stitching that hide back onto my inner sides

causes me to uncontrollably laugh out loud

and cry out in unimaginable anguish…

Can you imagine my conundrum?

Do you sympathize with my

undone situation, my

relative condition

a skinless rendition

what was designed

perfection, that which

I had rejected and subjected

and perplexingly peeled off of

my physical essence folded neatly

and put to a purposeful rest; what

could be the nexus of all of this?

Connection of all connections

with conviction, attempting

to recondition that which is

without any one doubt an

impossible proposition…

The what ifs flood my

unconsciousness, the pain

becoming torturous, furthering

this unreal, and absolute surrealisme; this

which I have done to me, to this whole of me

in awareness and with complete dignity I

struggle to rise from this deep despair

and I gasp for air, for one final breath

taken before I suddenly awaken

from this sweat wrenching

horrifyingly howling

nightmare of my

dreams …