You Are Not

You came home from school

You said your day was fine

You rush to the bathroom, slid your back down the wall as your skin began to grow paler and tears became heavier

After minuets of debating you grab the thing that will end it all

You do it. You let them get to you. 

It's all gone right?

  no. 

Your best friends sit at the lunch table everyday in blank silence

wishing you were there

to fill the air with blank silence

but you are not

Your brother breaks down everyday in class because someone mentions something  you liked

you were never close

but he wishes you were there to be his older sister

but you are not

Your mom stares at herself in the mirror with trembiling, chapped lips

only wishing she was with you instead of taking your casket to the nearest graveyard

she wishes you were coming home from the hospital

but you are not

Your dad switches to the late shift because he cannot stand listening to your empty room at 2am

he wishes you were up at ungodly hours on the phone

because you are so in love

but you are not 

Your boyfriend rushes into your room to find the Rolling Stones sweatshirt you were wearing on your last day

he tries to imprint your scent into his tear drenched skin

he wishes you were holding him

but you are not

Your friends stare uncharacteristically at the gymnasium walls as your principal announces your death

they feel the tears forming

they wish you were there to wipe them away

but you are not

The sun will still rise as it will still set

12am will strike the clock every night

The earth will rotate

but those people I mentioned will never want them to happen

they want you to be here

but you are not.