you saving me saving you

when She found me

the cobwebs had become a second skin

over the years, the irritation became comfort and safety

but She wasn’t having any of it

She ripped the door off its hinges

and nearly tore my skeleton apart as

She pulled me out of the closet

maybe it wasn’t time for me to come out

maybe i wasn’t ready

and yet She insisted i was rotting away in there

and that She was going to be my Savior

and i was to be Her best friend

the sunshine outside must have blinded me so

that the only thing that seemed to matter was Her

She was the World

and i revolved around Her

we were perfect for each other

i was the solution for all Her relationship problems

She was the only person i had any relationship with

i would help Her find the perfect outfit to wear

but i was always Her favorite accessory

until i started to develop some flesh

some pride in my skin

and She said it wasn’t healthy

i wasn’t me without my sunken cheeks

i wasn’t me without her shoulder to lean on

i wasn’t me without shame

or rather

i wasn’t the me in the closet

but didn’t She realize

She was the one who forced me out

'no', She said

'I need you to stay sick

because I love you'

(so that she could take care of me)

'I need you to stay sad

because i love you'

(so that she could be happy for the both of us)

'i need you to stay

because i love you'

(so that she could continue to feel better about herself)

her skin peeled to reveal

the leech who fed on my weakness

screaming, she reached out to pull me down

but I wasn’t having any of it

I grabbed her wrist and stared into her soulless eyes

'No', I said

'us together isn't healthy

if there's no mutual support

for us to exist as our best individually'

And because I loved her

I let go

so she could find herself