Your Hands

Dear You,

I understand

Maybe I led you on

Maybe my tight shorts were too much

But you were too much

You grabbed me like you owned

But I was not yours to own

I may have played along

I flirted but never thinking..never that

How was I supposed to know your hand would end up in my pants

I was only flirting with a boy who I thought was cute

You took advantage of my innocence

I didn’t know the difference

You felt no remorse

But the way you made me feel…

Why did you do that

How was that appropriate

We were in the middle of a pep rally

I’m sure somebody saw

How am I supposed to go on

I never meant for this to happen

I just thought we would end up boyfriend girlfriend

To  you, this may have been a game

I hope you have shame

There is no way you forget that day

It still haunts my dreams

Remembering the discomfort

Remembering the degradation I felt for myself

I knew it was wrong but I didn’t want to be

How could something like this happen to me

These are the things you see in the movies

The movies where the girl ends up hanging herself

Because the guilt was all she felt

It wasn’t her fault but he didn’t think it was his

How can a world like this exist

I don’t want your compliments

Your compliments are full of alternatives

I don’t care what you think

It is my body and it is mine to keep

Stop looking at me

I am not yours to mentally undress

Why are you still looking at me that way

I am not a meal displayed in front of you

I am a woman who is trying to hide from you

Why don’t you understand

I am not yours to have

We are just friends

Why are we even friends

Friends don't molest friends

Goddamn you and your fucking hands

I never want to feel the touch of  your hands

Never again

Your hands are your dishonor

Congratulations you made another nightmare

The nightmare of you

You touching me again

How dare you

This is the end