Your Timely Donation of $15

may save the sole remaining rhino, unwanted pets, a failed
democracy slated for euthanasia, starving children on the other
side of a flattened economy; possibly prevent the next genocide

currently in beta testing. So much for four score and seven,
Our Fathers normalizing enshittification, AI slop, brain rot,
dead internet poets left out in the cold rain deforestation

echo-chamber-maid-in-America-the-beautiful-girl-scout-cookies
tracking online activity, centering otherization; illegals want
your minimum wage-slave job that robots could do better -

planned obsolescence, unplanned parenthood [pregnant
pause] homogenization, silent majority beating tom-toms;
ground control under a boot heel. Honey, shrinkflation

downsized the therapist. The rapist in the Oval Office eating
creepy pasta with meatballs, diet cocaine, maximizing eyeballs
on dead sea doomscrolls: another strongly-worded email

might do the trickster god some good/bad/ugly. Bloated
for attention, those reefs bleached by climate denialism
will be eternally grateful for your contribution. Forty-two isms

rule things in or out, but the presidential seal pups of approval
went clubbing with a riot of colorized classics, a generation
wasted (sperm whale of a donor with untold offspring). Could

you tell me what’s the tell when a camera is lying? Look me
in the iPhone and say it on the record sleeve where I wear my
heart applied liberally but never taken orally without alcohol.

So, see, there’s nothing I can do. My budget hawk allocated
all cryptid currency for treats & tricks. I’m teaching old SmileDog
to shake hands and fetch 401K rollovers. It seems we’ve all

been barking down the right treehouse (mi casa su casa)
They met Them offline/old-school, seeing I to I on a tinderbox
date of expiration; beloved fantasy series soured on its own mythos

gnawed off its left head to escape the rumor millstone selling
my-ass-is-dragon t-shirts and albatross necklaces on Etsy.
High time we sober up, stop bluffing; the river hasn’t always been

burning (or has it?) Had we paid attention; had we left an age-
appropriate tip; had we done enough? Did it matter whether
or not unicorns were simply the best at grandiose unifying theories

not to be beaten / pawned / ignored… Let you stop me there,
because this one has herded me before, crawling under fences,
hungry for greener pasteurization; ghosts of unvaccinated infants

cross-breeding untapped potential and contemptible delusions.
You’ve been expecting this all along, ever since an algorithm
crawled into your ear and sold terror back to you pocket-sized,

irresistible, and checking all your boxes: marriage…hell, maybe
even one-point-five-kids. When it’s real, you just know. But
let’s not get carried away. Rearview mirrors are notorious liars.