Zoloft Child.

I am a Zoloft child. 

 

They say I've got daddy issues just cause I've never met the guy and they say the scars on my arm will never heal. I couldn't sleep and that's when it started. 

 

My first does of Elavil 

 

Oh but the sleepless nights didn't end and the weight loss started happened and the fits and the crying so here we are again. Another day another doctor. 

 

My first day of Zoloft. 

 

Well I feel nothing off these 50 milligrams and I still hate myself and my best friend has died and I've never grieved before and 

Another doctors visit. 

 

It's not working? 

My new dose of Zoloft. 

 

I feel all 100 milligrams pumping through my shameful body I stay up at night my thought are even foggier 

Doctor OH DOCTOR 

 

what happened. What happened when we started this and you said that it would make me feel better. I'm still cutting, Doctor. I'm still up crying myself to sleep my boyfriend is still holding me down while I'm having a fit I'm still shaking I'm skinny as a rail HELLO DOCTOR CAN YOU HEAR ME 

 

My newest addition 

Mood stabilizers 

 

See honey your bipolar and your crazy and you're not gonna be able to do this on your own and this is America the land of what we think is free but is not. 

 

No, it run by the pharmaceutical corporations that feed and feed us more. Just bump up the milligrams 

 

Start taking two

 

You'll feel better

 

This is the only way

 

Your depressed and you need help 

 

I do I'm crying CRYING for help and your handing me 3 small round pills.

 

But no, I refuse to let a pretty orange bottle tell me how my life is going to work

I refuse to let the man who just wants my money hold me down and force feed me happiness 

I refuse to stand here as our generation is being brainwashed by these chemicals coming from the ones they're supposed to trust 

 

I am a Zoloft child 

But I have grown. 

 

I have found my own happiness and I do not let a doctor define what that happiness is. I do not let this small blue pill tell me everything is okay. I do not let anyone have control over me or my body or my brain or my happiness and no, I will not sit down with you for an hour and spill my heart out for you to hand my a script. 

 

I am a Zoloft child, but will not be a child forever