Clareprunellpoetry

When you look at me, what do you see? Just "that girl with BPD"? You don't see how hard I fight, To hold back rage with all my might. To keep a grip, to hold control, A struggle burning through my soul. Emotions hit fast, sharp and raw, An inside battle, a full out war. All from a past I had to survive, My brain rewired to keep me alive. I mask and mirror to fit the crowd, While deep inside I scream out loud. I play the parts you need to see, A ghost of who I used to be. I wear a face to fit the room, Trapped inside a silent gloom. I swallow down the threat to break, Just for everybody else’s sake. You see the calm, you see the quiet, And miss the absolute full riot. You judge the wreckage, skip the cause, And fixate on my visible flaws, Never seeing the strength it takes, To live through every break it makes. I’m not just damaged, broken, wild, I’m the survivor of that child. I bleed, I rage, I break, I mend, And fight a war that doesn't end. So look at me, look past the name— I’m still right here despite the pain.