xerash

Music blasting through my ears

So loud I can’t hear anything else

Hoping and praying

That I’m never to be found

Carving away all of my pain

Or so I tell myself

Wishing for my brain

To just turn off

I know I’m in danger

Have been since day one

No need to remind me of that fact

Fighting to stay alive

To live and be me

Spitting up blood again

Because they need to show they’re number one

Now I’m hiding in the bathroom

Hoping they’ll call it quits for today

Can’t remember a life before this

When I still wanted to grow old

And cried tears of joy more than pain

Searching for a memory

Of when I didn’t have to worry

Never being alert

But I’m always looking for a nonexistent memory