dear mom and dad,

i am not perfect. i am not an A-honor roll kid. i am not the virgin, innocent little girl you wish to see. 

i am human. i am smart enough. i am free.

i know people do look up to me in their own way and i'm barely realizing that. 

they call me funny, free-spirited, mature, wise, thoughtful, big hearted, strong.

i try to please everyone at a time before i please myself. this is what gets me hurt. 

i worry about everything: money, friends, weight, diets, family, self-confidence, wardrobe, love, enemies, my past. 

i tend to not look in the mirror bc i'm scared i'll see my scars i try to hide. 

i smoke to numb the pain, i drink to become someone else. i have an alter-ego, her name is Bnasty.

she's amazing. strong, confident, sexy, out-going, fearless, stubborn, a fighter. 

i know my limit and i know who i am. i don't try to be something i'm not.

i am me, and i am perfectly imperfect.