I feel the rain pouring down,
I feel as if this closed window represents lost opportunities,
I feel like going back to a time where stress and being depressed was something that just didnt exist
I feel the memories that made me truly happy, I feel the emotion of when you first said I love you, and I said it too, and you weren't drunk or high,
I feel those words that came from the heart soul and mind were true to the end
But now all i feel is regret for not being able to say my last goodbye, you left, you didn't die but I did, not just on the inside but on the outside too,
I feel my feelings and thoughts breaking free from the imprisonment i call my body,
I feel the battle of right and wrong attacking my concealed contagious conscious containing crazy conclusions craving carefree consensual nights with other women, but wanting to stay loyal to you even though your gone

You told me days before you were leaving that me being able to see you physically was coming to an end, so now as I watch your Snapchat story ive come to the realization that I've lost not only a lover but a friend, your destination wasn't far, Arizona, leaving my head in a arid zone, I hopelessly wander through Facebook Instagram Snapchat Twitter whatever you use to find a sign of you coming back to me in my Arms so that I can hear your voice, feel you hands and arms grab on to me and never let go as if it was you last breath and you werenr ready to let it go, touching someone else isn't the same anymore, I can't think about another girl without being put in the twilight zone, cigarettes become my friend again depression moves backs in puts the walls that you tore down back up encasing me back into the sarcophagus that left me breathless, restless, and regardless of the circumstances I have no choice but accept your decision and accept that you're gone and not returning back to arms