Sick Girl's Lament
As much as I wish I could be UNstoppable
There’s no way that could ever happen
Because my immune system is my obstacle
You want me to have perfect attendance?
Tell that to my white blood cells they won’t hear you
Every March, August, and December it seems like
When you get news of a new breakthrough
You can call me but it won’t make a difference
My nyquil dreams don’t have you in them
Although fever dreams don’t make much sense
Every night every spare chance I get I succumb
To that blessed blankness where my brain can be bare
Haunted only by the persistent brain waves keeping me alive
Telling me “hey you should breathe now”
“Remember this forget that put this in the archive”
But it seems like nightly something topples the balance
Since I can’t seem to remember the ways you hurt me
Or recall your favorite song, or my mother’s favorite color
Maybe, just maybe I might be losing it by some degree
Well, it’s a 3 pound weight off my shoulders
Now the I only have to keep track of my hormones,
Drugs I’m taking, my weight, my eyes, my height
Any thyroid issues? History of cancer in your bones?
All answered in a blue ink pen with a flower on top
Because the worst thing about being constantly ill
Is depending on people in the worst of times.
I’d much rather depend on robot surgeons or Advil
Instead of you.