Self awareness

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The lack of will you see in me is foreign yet it fits right in. It stole the key that locks the door trapping me inside again. Funny how it seems like I've been here before,
I used to believe that I was just unlucky, That someday I would eventually have something great, But finally, I’ve accepted the truth and its sucky, My ability to self-sabotage is too great for good things sent my way.
Almost everything about me makes me feel crazyMy depressionCrazyMe doing my hair once a monthCrazyLoving someone I talk to off and onCrazy.  
Brain before body Response to stimulus   Required for life Required for happiness   If not made by you It will be made for you
If not from you first It doesn’t matter   Your perception Be careful with your definition   Vital part of life
Forth then back Teeter then totter   Deflected off Not quite straight back   Creation lives here Or so says the universe  
It feels different Makes you want to question   Don't resist Pay attention   Power lives in the changes
The world turns The sun rises Morning breaks as you realize It’s time for movement It’s time for change   The world turns
Dark and long goes the road Middle line stretches straight as if never ending   Lights only show so far But the line streams out straight into the black  
It based on results it won’t last Failure is coming and shatters perfection   Have you walked the path? Have you put in the work?  
Our fleeting view of reality Check points ensure accuracy   Balance your views  Mesh with humanity   Pursue beauty and truth
How do you love someone Someone you know at their core   The ins and outs, good and bad You know every thought and desire   You stand in judgement
Panic rages Anxiety attacks Fear abounds    How to make it stop Weather it? Fight it?   Breeding ground for inaction
It is not words It's not only thoughts Less talking required Internal rooting necessary Drive your legs down Let your feet firmly plant
Future   The future’s power Unlimited in nature Where creativity lives To shape the present   Past
Awareness within Not looking out It begins inside Then pushes its way out Self propriety and self focus Creating yourself isn’t selfish
A journey of life A painful endeavor A confusing time An inner turmoil A questioning mind A cloudy mess A day by day
Yes, the finely floating feathers Floating in the sky One of the feathers Even caressed my eye! Ye olde agua,  Frozen is dismissed. Oh, my dear Elsa! Let us dance, dance,  Forever more.
1 of a kind, 1 in a millionI just so happen to be unlike anybody, I just so happen to be nobody but me, I just so happen to have big brains and little stare,I just so happen to be nobody but me,I just so happen to have a big smile and little glare
Disclaimer: Before reading this piece, I want you to know these are not my own values and beliefs but the beliefs of men who indulge in toxic masculinity and stupidity on a daily basis. Thank you for your time.  •
You love have brought along  new ways in which I view myself. I was once selfish and yearning for acceptance but now I know I am not  the only one who matters.   You make me selfless. 
I could never come to terms with how  you viewed me.    You’re so pretty.  You’re so capable. You have so much potential.   You said that to me the other day.  
Like a poems watermarks, you've taught me a lot. Like a poems watermarks, I saw what was behind the lines. Like a poems watermarks, what I saw was to only my eyes.
Because I love you, I swallow your sins,
You show up Blowing smoke rings And making light in the dark Like my all-knowing caterpillar, Full                                                                  Of intelligent euphemisms Cleverly
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy and spreads them out like a tent to live under. He allows us to play with the idea of walking in immeasurable confidence. So we can take risks without the fear of failure. We can,
“Why do you want to be an artist? You have to be creative for that.” “Tattoos will ruin your life.” “People like you can't make it in this world.”
My soul is overflowing. My brain is overwhelmed. My heart is bleeding. Filling my veins and pouring itself through my fingertips. Mixing with the ink on the page. My words staring back at me.
Let me take a second, to explain. It's not everyday I'm put into a place. Between a rock and a hard place, having to try
The one thing I cannot live without is the belief that I am GOOD ENOUGH. Before I realized I was GOOD ENOUGH, life was much harder, days much longer, problems much bigger AND worries much more suffocating.
There are shadows Down the hall In the corner On the walls   Words are shallow I hear voices Some are deep Most are small   They direct me And inform me
Wet, clear streaks Like tears Rain left behind On the windows In the hallways   White streaks On the wall
I always see the good side of people,Always giving them the ‘benefit of the doubt’,While I expect others to do same for me,Still doing so even when they don’t. 
I am What am I? do you know? do I know? -of course I do. Only I can define myself. Only I know what makes me , me. But I am not here to tell you that. Who am I? I am a 15 year old girl .
Dawn gives way to Dusk Light gives way to darkness Fear of eternal Night breaks out Afraid to speak Afraid to look  Afraid to love Above all afriad to live Let go of your fears my friend 
Im a fool
Great. Everyday i wake up I have to see the face Of the person who kept me prisoner Poisoned my thoughts Abused my courage Constricted my soul Until i became lost In the trench
It’s kind of superficial for me to be writing a letter to myself when I’m only so young.
A young man dressed in grey Consumed in a subtle pain Walks along a path Woven, built, and made of frayed webbed thread, A conduit for hidden despairs. As if some vengeful deity
I live in a house of glass Go to each and every mass Completed my life’s task And do everything I’m asked. So, I wonder nightly When lights go out nicely When it all will end.
I am me, that's who I am. I don't go by your rules anymore. I am not just your pretty girl, I am so much more. I am a boy, a girl, neither, both, I am one, I am anything and everything.
My mind is like an old paintbrush;
Poem 1: Keep Calm and Don’t Judge Me Love (Shake my head); when I was fourteen years I thought I found love, Love like: Fairy Tales, and all that Fucking Bullshit people allow.
  Everything is shattered, broken, utterly and completely destroyed So dramatically so, windows broken in to a million pieces, paint strewn across the floor Yellow wall paper gone gray as if out of fear
Tears. As I sit in my bed.I try not to cry.But the tears sneak out.No one can deny.
I daydream of being something different, somewhere different I wonder, I questions, I think and I have come to the conclusion. Im not living to die, but dying to live.
Crushed by this endeavor. Broken by my lover. I once thought love was forever, but time seems to end when we were together   Hit the rocks from the tide. Dropped down from the vibe.
A dark gloomy place where there is know hope, just fear and exhustion.  Where food is substitued with screams of agony, fear, and hunger. With know escape, but maybe there is one, your only way out is death.
A dark gloomy place where there is know hope, just fear and exhustion.  Where food is substitued with screams of agony, fear, and hunger. With know escape, but maybe there is one, your only way out is death.
    A troubled mind of broken thoughts to ponder as you lay; drowning in an open sea of sorrow every day.   Console your thoughts with talks of love and what you hope will be,
Can you hear me now? The deep screams of my sorrow.              I screamed your name begging for you to come back to Me but you told me your time here was borrowed. I loved you and you were no longer here.
  You dare not look to close You may fear what you might find: A past composed ofFragmented glass, Broken up memories, In no way whole again Scattered across the floor,
To begin something, with a blank mind to begin somthing, where only time can tell you if it's what you thought only time spent, to figure what you've bought.   Most people never begin, 
We were born, Into a world that is clearly torn, By the concepts of love and hate. We soon forget to appreciate What we have and what is given. We let others affect our own decisions,
I'm from the largest apple the world's ever seen. from arroz con pollo and rice and beans. From dirty subways in the empire state in a 92nd street apartment it was all so great
What is it to be humane? Being characterized by kindness, mercy, or compassion? We give ourselves to much credit, when we leave our mark in a most abominable fashion.
17
I woke up early on my born day 17 Pristine in many ways Trying to keep the same i Melee I may lay on my bed thinking of ways Cream comes and make haste To Praise God for 365 days
It’s 50 million niggas, but not one man? It’s 50 million niggas that can be baby daddies, but can’t anybody be a father? It’s 50 million niggas that can read a book, but can’t anybody learn anything?
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