Ben
Location
He runs home, excited to see I'm still here.
All he can do is yell and laugh and cheer,
scream and holler, because I haven't left him yet,
because I'm the only one here for him.
He wants to talk about his friends and his school day,
but there's not much for me to say
because there's so much to share.
I listen to his exciting tales, but not to my surprise,
I can see the fear and anger in his eyes.
He doesn't hide it well.
He pushed Ben in the hall again, I deduce.
Because of his actions, Ben draws a noose
all over his math binder.
He imagines making it all end, all life and power in him,
thinking it'd be easier if it all went dim.
I sit and wonder if he's going to do it,
when he's going to do it,
if I can teach him to take a hit,
brush it off, and go about his day.
I don't think he can handle the pressure
Because he thinks no one cares about him.
His name is tattooed on my body.
Doesn't that show I love him?
That I care about him?
That he's not alone?
He has me, right?
What happens when I return to school?
I'd be called a fool
if I think everything will turn out cool.
He's so strong-willed and smart,
but all the mean words break his little heart
and tear this little boy's world apart.
Ben is twelve years old and wants to die.
All I can ask is how and why?
How has this kid not been punished
for bullying Ben?
How has John gone under the radar
of passing-by teachers and administrators?
Why has this escalated so far?
And why did he not share
knowing that I care
and so does Mom
and Alysia
and Samantha?
So many people care for kids who have
been bullied.
But, because of the negativity at school,
they can't see the love and
compassion waiting for them
at home.
Ben, just know, I love you,
no matter what you do.
I'll always be your big sister,
and you'll always be my foofoo.