Grown Up Too Late

Feelings, however 

hard they try, will always be 

repressed. Now 

pent-up is just the thing

you make me do. Months 

of love carelessly ruined, 

cast away. Because 

I could not love, 

that's what you told me. 

I loved when they did not 

kindly love me. Blame, 

tearing me down, keeping me 

in the middle of the battle that won't be won. 

It's my fault, 

your fault, 

funny how that works. Looking 

in the mirror, worthless, 

grow up, 

grow up. 

It's you, not 

me that needs to 

grow up! 

I was so fucking angry,

dragging through months 

of silence, begging, pleading 

for your love, 

your friendship — pointless. 

Being ignored by a person whose attention means the most.

The day came 

when I no longer fought. So

you did, aimlessly 

crawling back to me.

It's too late. 

It’s all out there.