Lost Light

It starts off slow, a tugging at the heart. A sort of deep ache welling up within the subconscious Something that cannot be expressed in words You see them talking, laughing, but not like they care if you see You are nothing to them. A veritable bacteria to be stomped out, destroyed. You do not listen to their taunts, even though the words cut like knives that slice your skin and flay your flesh. After a while, this feeling becomes routine, a grim monotone of blood and pain. The teachers do nothing, your parents lose hope. You lose a sense of self. The outward taunts leak into your soul, filling you with self doubt and loathing. Thoughts flicker like candles in the wind as every day becomes torturous and terrifying. When a supposed safe haven is a breeding ground of falseness and deceit. Tears soon cease to flow, you are confused as to whether you have become numb or if you simply have run out of tears to cry. Both thoughts scare you. Your parents tell you to cling on to a false hope. To yearn for life the way a maggot yearns for rotten flesh. Your tormentors are everywhere. They laugh, they taunt. Life becomes meaningless. Despair claws at you with its desperate, evil grip. There is nowhere to go, no one to talk to. Only the blackest of depravity exists now. A life sucked dry of emotions by the leech of endless torment. You decide that enough is enough. Heart beating, the warm syrup of your blood coarsing through your scarred veins. The support beam will support your wieght To think the belt was a valued gift from a loved one. The knot, the cold feeling of leather on your pulsing neck. A gasp, a last cry for tears that are not there, for help that will not come Despair, emptiness You jump Vanish A candle blown out by the wind .