Thank You

Dear Iris,

Look at me.

4.07 GPA

Three sport athlete

Well liked person

Trusted friend

All good things, right?

Take a look again.

How about we talk

About the not so pretty picture

That you have carved into my soul

Why don’t we talk

About the four months

Of reaching the limit

The anger and the isolation

I felt during my sophomore year

On and off of a lacrosse field

At our high school

Why don’t we talk

About the behind the back comments

The insults and the ignorance

The fear of being harmed

Verbally or physically

I can tell you why we don’t talk about it.

We don’t talk about

The shit that some players go through

Every day

because they’re not strong enough

pretty enough

popular enough

Not enough, no, never enough

To fit your stereotype

We don’t want to say the word bullying out loud.

But I am not a victim

Sure, I went through four months of misery,

and pain and isolation,

where you backstabbed and

belittled me and smiled at the

bruises that you caused

but I am not a victim

Sure I am still recovering from those four months

With you and your buddies

and still have trouble with my own self-worth

my self-image

but I am not a victim.

And now,

All I want to do is look you

in the eye

and say that you did not break me.

And honestly,

I want to tell you to your face

Right to your face

Thank you.

A thousand times, thank you

for making me stronger than you will ever be.

~Marina