Overly concerned with imperfections,
I couldn't bear my own reflection.
I was slowly coming apart at the seams.
I was struggling with low self-esteem.
As I ponder and start to recall,
Tenth Grade was perhaps the worst year of all.
I was self-conscious and apprehensive,
For instance, in my writing elective.
I wrote about an incident
Of emotional imprisonment.
Cruel kids caused me a world of damage,
A world that was too hard to manage.
I chose not to share my writing,
Nor reveal the feelings I was hiding.
I didn't want my peers to see
That particular side of me.
For being happy beyond comprehension.
I've always gotten a great deal of attention
I enjoyed being perceived this way,
So I forced myself to pretend each day.
The person that I had become,
She let herself be overcome
By nonsense running through her mind,
A past she couldn't leave behind.
I carry a heavy past on my shoulders
That will get lighter as I grow older.
At times I ask, is something wrong?
Is it supposed to take this long?
My experiences have helped me discover
That if I ever plan to fully recover,
I must leave things the way they are,
Just sit back and let Time take charge.