Benny

She went through her young adult youth Always feeling so troubled. She would have her friends at school She would have her family at home She practically had it all, Yet she always felt That something was missing. This empty feeling inside her That she couldn’t quite express This longing for something, Yet she didn’t know What that something was. She thought to herself Everything is going well I have excellent grades I have most of what I want, And there’s nothing much else I could ever ask for, But why do I still feel uneasy Why do I still feel this way? Always keeping it inside Never bothering anyone else About her own internal struggles, She attempted to move past it Suppressing this feeling Every time it came up. As she scrolled Through her Facebook news feed And saw the smiles In every picture that came up Of her friends and acquaintances She felt like they were mocking her, Though she could have easily been In those pictures and be just as happy This dark side of her life Hindered her efforts at achieving Any ounce of happiness, It pushed her down. Every time she tried to get back up And every single time It got harder and harder to dust herself off And try again. There were also those other Spontaneous moments When she would go about her daily routines of life And such feelings would just come up again, Unannounced and unneeded. No matter what time No matter what place Such feelings emerged, And they never ceased to plague her mind She wondered As I repeatedly attempt to move past this And try to go on with my life As if everything is okay, Will this ever actually go away? As I grow older And progress onto my adult life Establish a career, settle down, or whatever I desire, Will I ever be able to find The remedy to my tragedy The clarity within my insanity?