My body furls under the pressure.
My mind is absent and bosy aches with the concoctions of :
sarrow and disappointment
stress and uncertainty
topped wtih :
cold sweat, clammy hands, migraine I can only think to myself what if I chose another path.
My mind goes on and on and on about how things would have, could have ben different.
Yet, if only I if I chose a different path.
If, only if I chose to not to mke the choice that lead me to this point.
The point were I put myself in the posistion between chest pains and a corner- where I curl myself in and rock-
back and forth-back and forth-back and forth
Then shaking my head-
left then right. till my neck tired and knots. 
THEN-
I look up to see..
that life goes on.
people go on.
WE go on.
The panic of perfection goes on... with only breif moments in a compression chamber- that will allow you to open up, like a blooming flower in the spring