Wishing I could be like
Social, outgoing, perpetually cool
daring, throw caution to the wind, chuck the rules.
Like Friday night at the game in the stands,
cheering for no reason with all of the fans.
Like a rock 'n' roll concert from the 1980s
staying out all night with friends, getting crazy.
Spontaneous, carefree, just going all out,
endless thril, excitement, the need to shout.
While I reside in a bubble-like state,
throw me with them, I might hyperventiate.
Being an outcast in a fast-moving crowd,
I yearned to be like them but now I am proud,
proud of who I am, unique through the heart
embracing the introverted, realistic, and "smart,"
peacefully calm, self-motivated
girl who's so low key how could she be hated.
Although I may express myself different than you,
my life, my purpose, is valued too.
So when you tell me "she's quiet, she never talks,"
search beneath the surface of my well-locked box.
I can fill a room with beautiful music, you see.
The notes, the rhythms, chords all flow through me.
My mind is a center of emotional action,
my fingers and body conduct the passion
and energy pulsing through every pore, I feel
as I close my eyes, I'm alive this is real
life, no half-hearted effort at trying to be
a stereotypical image of mainstream society.
And I know that resisting the desire to be like all the rest is the real test,
it gives me the power to be my best.
Changing myself into someone I'm not
defeats the purpose of what we all thought;
that being unique is better than same,
have fun your own way, forget high school fame.
I can never truly change my personality,
but I have the power to change my mentality.
I know I am not outgoing and crazy
but with the perspective of others, just maybe
I take up their mantra, seize the day
and try something unexpected, explode like a ray
of sunlight from inside, it won't be seen by them
but I will just be myself and carpe diem.