Whether it be for the things I ask for,

or the things every human deserves.

 

Every child needs love,

not resentment filled intentions.

 

You stole my childhood with your Marlboro Reds,

and Miller Light cans that clutter my life even to this day.

 

Your mother didn’t love you,

and neither did your father.

 

Both of my creators 

have mothers who don’t have time for them

and fathers with drinking problems.

 

So why build another life off these same sorrows?

 

As much as you would tell me you loved me,

your drinking and drugs told me otherwise,

I always knew when you were high.

 

You put on this mask of a good person,

and I try to believe it’s you daddy,

but I know it’s not. 

I know what the real you looks like.

 

When I was 8 I had a nightmare,

and I was too afraid to tell anyone about it, 

because I thought it was real, and it was called life.

 

When you’re constantly shut down it doesn’t build character,

it builds a lying, stealing child with no morals.

Don’t pretend like it’s wrong.

 

In my lifetime you’ve taught me nothing,

my being doesn’t even have the essence of you

When I grow up I want to be able to hold the things I couldn’t have.

Live my life how it should have been lived,

you created a lifelong misery.

 

Thank you for keeping me so naive to the world,

thank you for shoving me into this world blind,

it’s a control thing and I get it.

 

When I leave you better believe I won’t contact you,

don’t come looking for me,

I need to be the person I always tried to be.

 

When the smoke rings from my lips turned into

fantasies of the smoke rings coming from the barrel,

nobody knew how serious I was.

 

I would die 365 days of the year to escape this life,

built upon the lies that both of you created.