Here I stand, in my apartment, where you broke me, you took the old me, and molded me into something new.
someone I hardly recognize,
who is that girl in the mirror?
I can't stand to see my own face anymore:
The crooked nose, the black and blue eye, the gash inflicted by the ring I gave you
and all the while you were screaming at me "I loved you".
Well, love hurts sometimes I guess but it's not supposed to hurt this way
the kind of way that used to make me wish that you had taken my life
as you almost did that day, your hands wrapped around my throat, eyes locked on mine
as you took my breath away.
Now you've stained my life like coffee might stain a beautiful white dress
a stain that reminds me every day of what you took from me; my innocence gone in the blink of an eye.
replaced with the flashbacks, the nightmares, the bloody memories in my head that won't let me forget your name.
But I will no longer be blamed, shamed, victimized and condescended because of your evil.
I am not a victim who will be silenced by the stigmas surrounding domestic violence
"why didn't you leave him?"
"how could you not see the signs?"
"what did you do to provoke him?"
Enough asking me what I did to make him attack me and instead teach him and others like him
that he is not entitled to do whatever he wants to my body.
Enough blaming victims of assault, abuse, rape, telling them "well, you probably asked for it"
Yeah, just like I asked to be thrown from my bed while I was asleep
onto the floor where I almost lost my life because a man wanted to take it from me.
I am a survivor, I am a woman and I have had enough.