The first time I watched good will hunting I was happy. The movie made me happy and the relationships within the film were reminiscent of ones I had in my life at the time. I was Matt Damon and she was Minnie Driver. I was problematic and she was perfect. Damon would talk about Driver in a such a way that I related to and felt about her. The movie made me happy. The second time I watched the movie I wasn't happy and relationships within the film were reminiscent of ones I had in my life at the time. I was Robin Williams and she was his deceased wife. I was miserable and she was off in a better place, in love with someone else. The way Williams spoke of her in a way that made me realize what I felt then and what I feel now. I was truly happy, now I'm not. Damon asks Williams what he thinks his life would be like if he had never met his wife, and Williams asked if Damon was asking if he felt he would be better off, and Damon apologized for asking the question, assuming it had upset Robin Williams' character. Williams told him that even with the pain he felt now, he didn't regret a single day he spent with her. Not even the night that he missed Game 6 of the World Series in 1986 where possibly the most famous moment in Red Sox history occurred in Fenway Park in Boston. He spent that night with her and missed what might have been the night of his life. But he didn't miss the night of his life. He did have that night, that day. He met the girl he loved. And that was worth way more to him. I was left feeling like I'd miss an event of that caliber a million times over if it meant I'd meet her. 

 Near the end when Driver is about to go off to college and she admits her love for Matt Damon's character and asks him to go with her, Damon realizes his feelings for her and is scared she will find that she doesn't love him and he'll be stuck in California. He doesn't feel like he can be loved. I don't feel like I should be loved. He pushes people away before they have a chance to leave him. So I'm told by my best friend that I do the same. And so I'm Damon again. Minnie Drivers character tells him to tell her that he doesn't love her so it's easier for her to leave. I wish she didn't love me. I don't deserve it and its part of why she's not happy. I wish I'd never met her. Not for me, but for her. So she'd be happy. So she'd never have to wonder what could have been and what more we could have had. So she'd be happy. I don't regret a single day I spent with her, or wish I'd never met her, because I'm selfish. And I bet she spends every moment when she's sad about be wishing she'd never met me but she doesn't realize it yet. I'm a plastic spray painted gold trophy that they hand out to kids after little league every year. She's 14 karat real fucking gold, and she doesn't even know it. She hates my guts and she doesn't even know it.