I Want to be an Angel

But I don't know much about God

I know want to sit with him and his others

But my existence is sin

And I'll never reach what I want

 

Its fruitless

That's how God wanted all human effort to be:

Fruitless

Like Eve in the garden before

Lucifer showed her what she could have

If she defied one man’s wishes

 

I know not to worship the devil but

I'll follow Eve’s footsteps

I want more than what I can get so

I’ll try and fail and try and fail until I change

 

I never went to church

My mom didn’t believe that the chaplains were real priests and 

My dad didn’t care either way

So whatever that means for me 

And my relationship with God and 

My own sins

I don’t know

 

But I do know that

I’m going to keep sinning and 

Feeling how I feel

I’ve known me for 17 years and 

God’s known me none

 

I know he could hurt me bad

I know I don’t respect him like I should

He’s going to hurt me when I die and he finds out that

I’ve gone through my life sinning and refusing to confess and being his bastard child

 

But I'm determined

I'll destroy my body and 

Disfigure the face of 

All that God’s created

To be an angel

 

This poem is about: 
Me
My family

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