I do understand You're in pain. I'm not ready to feel it too. I know it won't be long before I allow the feel'n to engulf Me & the flood gates open. I'm flap'n My wings thru the undertow look'n for My ground to fall upon & fall apart. All the while hold'n My head just barely above water stay'n cool & collected for focus.That's the only way I can survive this inner fight to Live another day for the war headed My way.
I keep My thoughts tamed to maintain a future worth Living. You stretch Me, bring'n Me strength & weakness. Leave'n Me without a doubt, a know'n I can't deny Myself, that I have Truth to, yet Live, so that I may become I AM.

You touch'd Me in ways only You can. I don't take that lightly. That's deep. Meaningful. Untouchable yet You touch'd.
The more I share, the thinner I become. I'm gonna break soon....
Idk if I'm ready. I know the wail & Heartbreak I have coming.

And grieve & mourn, bellowing My sorrow, unleashed, meant to effect across the universe. I'm too scared to put words to ask anything.... fearful of being swept further away from You.You stretch Me, I need control & free flow.

In the stretch I have fall upon feel'n all My reincarnations for clarity, all of the identities that I've held. I feel the vastness of My Soul, of Me, Who I Am, I have been training for this "right now". I been training & preparing "for this", for Lifetimes. Now it's time I allow all the wisdom that I've gained, throughout My Souls journey. To emerge within Me now. You inspired the Alchemist in Me just so I can hold Myself together. How much grateful can I express I feel for You but to BE all embodiment of I AM.

I'm torn apart. Is this a cosmic joke On Heart? I don't understand why. I don't understand. How much more dues do I have to pay? To have tasted heaven in You then told I've had My share & that's enough is maddening.

I'm on thin ice now.... I must tread lightly...... I'm too scared to say anymore, for the weight of it all, is going to crush thru. I must sign off for now. I'm gonna lose Myself losing My $h!t

Cruel cruel cosmic joke.

I can't even psycho laugh