The Life I Chose

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As a young girl I was told to accept my life, to live my life with a smile so bright. To never let a man use your body as a store and your skin as a tissue for his shitty mistakes. I was made to be loved, to be use for perfection, and powerful like wings of an eagle. I went one way and never even look down the other. I use cuss words to break my pain and drugs to expose the sin that whispered in my mind. I looked for love in all te dark corners, but the church was to bright. I loved the way it felt to be notice to be free and full of life. However, death surrounded me like sheets caressed me like lost lovers and gave me peace so blissfully i didnt even feel it.... I loved the feeling, I loved the drive.. It dried my eyes it went deep that i felt it in my mouth. it cut my like a nife it kissed me like i was missed.. it felt me, i felt it.. the more i did it the more I wanted. I chose to be this person I am.. you dont have to like it or even think about what i do hell.. im happy.... lonely.. but happy I didnt want you find out this way..no. I never wanted this to happen to be alone and trapped by the melodies you sung to keep me. I didnt want he world to end I didnt want the day to end. I wanted you to like me, to love me, to give the best thing that anyone could give me.. which is Life. I didnt have to  S P E L L it out for you.. you made me burst from the inside out you made me smile you made me cry and wiped my tears from my eyes. i trusted you.. i made you feel good.. i want to accept my life but i want it to accept me. to give me back what i gave up. my time, joy, and energy. If life was a person i would punch him in the damn mouth. You liar you ungrateful son of a bitch. you didnt give me shit but hurt of no return .. now every person i see i want to kill and burn i want them to take advantage of me.. LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO ME! how can you not see you emotions run through me? Im nothing without you. You are the life i chose.. I would do it again if i could i would do anything to make you stay with me like sam smith would say.. " Why wont cha stayyyy with me?, Cause your allll i need " .. A Bunch Of BULLSHIT if you ask me.. but i cant imagine my life without you... Your The Life I chose                To habe a sdjidsiddc 

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