no one ever told me I'd miss my ghosts.

she dampened me, hindered me, hollowed me out

but at least,

the red reminded me,

i was alive.

no one ever told me I'd miss

the mess.

the dirty clothes on the floor, 

the red stains on metal,

i miss not being able to breathe as I sobbed

no one ever told me I'd miss being sad, because now

i feel nothing at all.