Suffocating Silence

Hands raised in a manilla classroom

Walls plain, littered with 20th-century posters

Faces unamused, drifting into unconsciousness

Voices murmuring the answers amongst virgin silence

Most feel calm, reveling in the simplicity

Security, feelings of safety

I feel trapped, utter dread and trepidation

Pencils tapping, bodies moving, papers shuffling, ponytails whipping

Suffocating silence, suffocating silence, suffocating silence

What if there is a bang, a pop, a shot?

Where will I run to, who will I shelter, who will shelter me?

He seems suspicious, talking to himself

She may be a threat, looking lost and disconsolate

They may have other plans, other motives hidden in the shadows

Suffocating silence, suffocating silence, suffocating silence, suffocating

What ifs

What if I am not safe

What if the world is gathering to take me out

What if it’s just in my head, fantasies curling to envelope me in anxiety

He may not be a menace

She may be rather sunny and kind

They may be innocent, never working in chorus to plan my morality

Hold your breath and count to ten

Remind yourself you are okay

Relax in the silence and welcome in the unknown

Maybe that silence is a blessing

Let it comfort you, let it hold you, let it guard you

Let the calm stifle your fears

And let the silence suffocate the possibilities of shotguns unknown