What would make me tick?

I remember what would make me tick.

When I entered high school it was like a rebirth.

Opportunity would make me tick.

I wanted to travel the earth.

I would volunteer at elderly centers and look after kids.

I could speak Spanish and write in Japanese.

I wanted to expand my mind, and I did.

But what makes me tick now?

Over the weeks my mind slowly unravels.

Yet my parents think I'm the smartest.

Meanwhile all of my friends are planning to travel.

Unlike my little sister, I'm not an artist.

I've tried to learn a language but the desire would fade away.

I've tried to write a screenplay but I would always be stuck on a blank page.

What makes me tick?

I spend the days lying in my bed.

My nights browsing on the web.

My parents disappointedly shake their heads.

"I'll get outside later", that's what I've always said.

But I never would go outside, they would always resign.

I lie in bed, a slack body and blank mind.

What makes me tick?

So much potential going to waste.

I've forgotten what makes me tick.

I know it but I'm not in a haste, to change.

Yet it still makes me sick.

My mind brings back memories of what I was like a high tide, I drown.

My hope slowly goes down.

What makes me tick?

Nothing makes me tick.

I need a spark, I need a push, I need a change.

I need to remember what makes me tick.

I need to tick again.