Who am I?
What have I let myself become?
A person so dependent on your love that I merely can't see through the fog
So blinded by the thought of you that it clouds the very reasons why this wall I've built is there
What have I done?
I've let a person grab so tightly around my heart
That I've let myself lose sight of my interests for yours
I feel as if I'm not alone that everyone has a person in which they make a home
But what is a home when all there is, is pain?
When the mere thought of opening the door brings back the flood
The flood of hate and agony
The flood of love and lust
The flood of emotions that I can't bare to relive
Yet, here I am standing infront of this house again
Yearning to open the door
But terrified of what's beyond the threshold
What have I become?
I used to love with all my heart
But now it's locked away
I used to see the good in you
But I've come to see I've ran out of places to look and you've ran out of reasons to let me in
I know what I've become
A convienience for your soul
To know that another being is in your control
That your actions and destructive behaviors
Though they create darkness
They will never create enough for me to leave
I've allowed myself to be the guided light in that darkness you call a soul
I've allowed you to use every piece of me to put yourself back together
Given every ounce of love in me so that your hapiness can be achieved
But where has that left me?
A million sleepless nights while you lay there sound asleep
A heart that's locked away while you hold the key
My heart ache is binding me to you
Who have I become?
I can tell you who I've become
A mere shadow of a person who no longer is in exhistence
A person that I myself don't recognize the reflection
I've tried so hard to change into the person I once was
But this wall is far to high even for me to try to climb
Yet, here I am standing here again
At this door, at the familiar place
That hides so much hate
So eager to let everthing I know fade into the past
To step a crossed this very threshold
To let you take control
Here I stand blinded by the love that you say that you possess
What have I let myself fall into?
A never ending story
Of broken people trying to find the pieces within each other
Yet, to scared to truly love one another