Everyone leaves me.

This façade is so much simpler than the real me.

She is happy and lifts everyone’s spirits up,

who is she?

 

I never knew her and I still don’t.

She is unknown to me but everyone else seems to love her,

Me, who am I?

 

It is much simpler to let others leave me because of who I am not

than to have them leave me because of who I am.

 

I showed my true self once.

He left me after two years and did not wait until he broke it off.

I fought for us. 

He rubbed her in my face.

I was worthless for him.

 

Me? Who am I?

I am that happy girl that is always smiling

even though she is numb inside.

I smile through the pain and hold my tears back

because that is what a responsible girl does.

 

She puts others feelings before her own

even if they broke her.

She does not complain

because that is not the way her parents raised her.

 

Everyone eventually leaves me.

I would rather be left for who I am not

than for who I really am.

 

This way I do not cry.

This way I do not hurt.

This way there are no memories I agonize over.

This way when someone leaves me I do not complain.

This way I am stronger.

This way I hold the power.