Break. Brake.

Wed, 09/25/2013 - 14:46 -- NaomiKW

Location

At what point on the 4 dimensional graph on which you are currently residing

-the graph labeled ‘life’ on every axis- 

do you find yourself no longer climbing, but flattening out into a plateau,

reaching your ‘end point’, or worse, rapidly receding into negative values?

At which point do you stop being a goal achieving mastermind

and start becoming a simple ‘survivor’ of the world?

Every winter the snow seems colder to you,

the dog’s bark louder,

and the festive dinner tastes like lead.

You are fighting a losing battle and you know it.

The sand funnels through the hourglass.

It’s not cancer, nor a horrible act of terrorism. Almost worse, you think-

                        It is only time.

 

There was a moment when I forgot how to spell the word ‘heartbreak’

You see words have more meaning to me if I imagine what they look like,

and I knew it was my heart that hurt but I didn’t know if that was because

it had broken,

or because it had stopped.

A car will brake to stop from breaking,

but it seemed I was broken and stopped. Held in place and unable to function.

Spelling ‘heart’ was easy,

(just two curved lines coming together into a point sharp enough to kill. )

It was the ‘break’ that stopped me,

the ‘break’ that braked me.

Breaks break me, and brakes stop me,

And broken brakes break me.

I still haven’t worked it out; although my spellcheck tells me it is ‘heart-b-r-e-a-k’

I think it depends…

Heartbreak is for when you are broken,

And heart-b-r-a-k-e is for when you are done.

 

 

 

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