How Does Anyone Do This?

With stained eyes and blurry vision

I tried and tried with much precision

But no matter what I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t take away the emptiness I felt

However, I did gain a deeper understanding I can barely articulate,

even after all that’s happened

 

The reality is I might be this way for the rest of my life

Hi, I’m Kendall and I have depression,

Well possibly bipolar but no one seems to know really what’s going on

No one seems to be able to figure out why I have these episodes

These periods of despair

Feeling like I’m going nowhere,

Trapped.

Then it changes to periods of happiness,

As if I’m way up high on top of the world,

Looking down at the vast opportunities below as if there were never any problems before

 

But what do I do when the voices in my head are telling me I’m better off dead,

Screaming.

There’s fire in my chest

And pain in all the rest

I can’t do this, I thought

I don’t know how anyone does this, I thought again, and again, and again

Until it drives me insane

How does anyone do this? Life that is.

How does anyone live plagued by chemical imbalances no one seems to understand,

Always feeling like you have no plan of what to do or where to go,

No.

 

So I ask again,

How does anyone do this?

Because if you know how to get through,

I’d love to speak with you.

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

kxndll

this is amazing and crazy relatable! my name is also Kendall and I had to check the submission because I didn't remember writing it  haha

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