how He made me

 When he made her

he said she was going to be smart and funny and kind

and caring and she was going to have a boyfriend that she adores,

that always calls her beautiful

but she will have depression and anxiety

she will always believe that she is ugly and not worth anything

but due to her kind nature she will always help others before herself

because she's funny she will always make jokes about her doubts and insecurities

but she always tries to be the best version of herself

as for her boyfriend, she doesn't think she deserves him,

she just knows that eventually he'll see her the very same way she sees herself

an ugly worthless waste of space

and she will be devasted when he does

because everything he told her

would have been a lie

every smile he made her smile would have been a waste

 Depression makes her have doubts

and Anxiety fuels those doubts

Anxiety makes her spiral

it makes her think of every single thing that could end up badly

and another thing with anxiety

is that it doesn't just let her tell all of these things to people

it makes her believe that they won't care about her problems

that it would make them think she was just looking for attention

but that's another thing

she truly needs attention

she needs someone to talk to her

about the dumbest thing

or the simplest

she just wants someone to know that she exists

she wants someone to know that she is on the earth

because she might just do something to herself 

and she wants at least one person to know she's not there anymore

she wants everyone to know she's sorry

even though she hasn't done anything to them

shes just sorry

she always has been




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