deep thought

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How did I get here? Why did I stay? I’m searching for sunshine, But my home is the rain. Home is the prison I don’t want to escape,
One's view is the basis for reality  It's the basis for most standards The idea of Innocence is not alienated from this basis   Innocence has a fraternal twin  Ignorance
Ever wanna just get away,find a place to stop and think?  Somewhere alone with your thoughts, so in your mind you can sink.  Soak in the beauty of your surroundings,and enjoy the view. 
It is easy to lose oneself gazing into the vastness of space.   The calm beating of the heart begins to mirror the gently pulsing twinkle of the stars. The consciousness is perfectly absorbed
Lay with me and drift, drift away, high into a cloud. Just laying here with a soft song coming out a old stereo. Saying sweet nothing under the influence only makes me smile.
Oh, weeping daffodil, why do I cry, A great pouring rain, but I can't bring you life? Oh, mountain high, why do I climb, If only to find higher mountains behind?
I wish the world would go silent So I could listen to the drip,  drip, dripping Of the water leaking in from the cracks in the walls Filling up this tiny room. As the air escapes
They tear you apart,
"You're as happy as a Christian should be." "Have you ever cursed?" "You actually know that song!" Just a few of the daily comments from my peers.
Is it ok to be gay? Because that's all I've ever known. I tell myself I can take the jokes.
We see it happen  Do we do anything? Once.. twice.. thrice We see it happen
Not really, It is my mask of meaniness  It is always on. (In school mostly)  I have it on for protection  For a reason of deep resentment If people saw a different mask on Oh! Here comes the trouble. 
I am happy for everything in my life  I am happy for the parents I have  The friends I conversate with  The house I live under  The food I eat  Even if I did not have those things, I will still be happy 
 You would think someone with a disease would have problems in school such as socializing or generally fitting in. Growing up down south and moving to New York city was a huge change for me.
The worlds a stage and we are just mere actors, But the stage is too large, the lights to bright The audience won’t like us if we aren't just right Just the right amount of funny, pretty, smart, kind We panic under the pressure but it’s all just
    Six feet under I wonder what I could've done better Changed my chains, got a job, moved out the cellar, Rent a car, take my Ma on a first rate vacation,
Violence, much happens to people who keep silence  Oppression led the oppress to depression One gun can kill many sons  Teenage girls are confused, all bruised 
Land of the free but my expression is muffled The United States is a deck and we're all being shuffled  We all believe to be A's but in this game theres lots of different faces 
I have an associates degree at eighteen but I haven't made it , to everybody else my goals are just... dreams just because i have a limp, i have no potencial it... seems  on top of that im Mexican with a love for hip hop,
Dear Person Who Deserves to Die a Fiery Death While Simultaneously Being Eating By a Shark,
You say this pain is my fault   that i put this gapeing hole in my chest  when all i tryed to do was set you free  from your monster inside  i put myself in harms way over and over again  i tryed to help 
"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" why does she starve herself? you're fat those are just words why does she hate what she sees in the mirror? you're ugly 
The sky Drowns the world In silent sorrows Of its own.   Oversized droplets  Create a harmony Of misunderstood Memories.   Like the raindrops
All my Life I been going through the same thing At times want to give up  Because of all this pain Trying to prove people wrong  They say I wont change  Well why judge me when they are doing the same thing
If I were to say,
Dark shadows underneath those frosty blue eyes, smudged with jet black mascara from a long, hollow night. The wind blows relentlessly, the world is still asleep as you trudge the streets that
Whats the point of faking a smile? when in all reality your miserable inside people call you selfish for wanting to die but your whole life you've faked the smile so they don't feel guilt
The ocean level rises
After everything, you were ignoredLike me before, lonely and boredI chose to take a standGave to you my hand
When I was eight years old they told me to stop At eight years old my academic license expired I was destined to be average All because little girls and little boys ridiculed my intelligence
So you pick on me? Why? Do you really hate me like you said? Or is that a lie. Like the lies you tell to everyone else saying I did something Like I am your enemy Well your mine Your my enemy
I feel useless I feel unloved I feel like no one contacts me unless they need something I know it's true because when I need someone, No one replies But the second they need me I am there
Today is today, I mean that's what everyone says. But today is the day that I hide , in the shadows, faces of you are revealed in my sight. I'm afraid to ever walk in those steel doors, because with me you have no insight.
Not a Nobody   This story rings true To me and you A story of a kid Who thought he knew
the ten year old boy sat still waiting for his mom to drive him to school his stomach felt ill the kids called him fool i look at him he looks at me i say keep your head up it'll get better
All of a kids high school years, are spent in fear, fear that he'll get picked on because he's fat, walking down the hallways and hears them, pointing, laughing, all for a joke, he sits there and wishes he could choke, every single one of them.
I often regret the day we met
People do not think always when they speak Some words can change us and set us apart We have heard it before, fat, fool, fag, freak These words are like sharp daggers through the heart  
I can taste it no feel it the warm, crimson colored liquid as it seeped out of my flesh ahhh FRESH but as the darkness devours me all I can think of, see, is you.....
The world is too big for one man to do all the talking The world is too small for everyone to speak at once That’s why I’m speaking my mind now
She goes by no name. Nor has any friends. She sits alone watching everyone else smile and laugh.
Everywhere we look, people silently judge, that's what they always do, we think we look fine, we act polite, we dream big and cry inside, everyone is a judge, you just don't know , they could be your best friend, a parent, or just a mere acqainte
I know it won't be different
It hurt when the one you love leave you. It hurt when no one cares about you.    
Why would you just stand and watch? What if it was your friend or family? Feeling emotionally lost. Feeling as if no one is there. Feeling embarassed.
What I Would Change By Adde Kramer   Sadness I have a happy voice that can be heard by fe ut e people that do hear i hop are happy too.  
You ask what I would change about things in my life, today. Why does the world listen to the media and accept what they say? Why doesn’t internal beauty matter to us more than external looks?
Ode
Stop wondrous things and look at this misfortune A soul has arrived due to physical exhaustion Just when the positive vibe arrives it leaves a sense of caution So listen to the spiritual uproar
He said that it was such a stupid thing to have that I must feel embarrassed  And I was embarrassed for the sheer innocence of it all I didn’t understand why he scorned upon it hated me for it
I know what its like, To not belong, To be called weird, Just for being me. I am alone, I know not what I did, I know not why, But I stand alone.
Some say you have to be cruel to be kindI say being cruel is just so you could say hurtful things to othersAnd not care what that person thinks.All my life I have been bullied and witnessed others being bullied
Diseases, diseasesKeep me with Jesus. My name's not punk,Nor am I junk.To give you a start,I have my own heart.
I’m on the verge of setting free of all the pretty things left inside me does that scare you?
All the room is silent Sounds of pens clicking Teachers flipping through the pages of the same book Suddenly a girl walks in She seems different Smells different, too Boys snicker and tell her things
I feel like a porcelain doll
Bullying hurt.. No matter how old your are Step up and say something More than a 1,000 kids are bullyied It hurts... I know it does Make a change to your school and reach out to others
Why such hurtful words? Did you enjoy the first time you got a tooth pulled cause your cravings called for sweets? Did you find pleasure while falling from your bike, scraping a chunk of skin off your leg?
The hours she spends to be perfect, the hours tries to cover her flaws. She cannot see the beauty within, she only sees the ugly outside. If only she could leave the quarrel; just disappear into thin air.
Depression Terrifying, weakening Ripping, tearing, killing, Done with life
When you look at me what do see?Do you see an original or do you see a copy? Do you see beauty or do you see ugliness? When you look at me what do you see? Do you see a rich person or do you see a poor person?
You let others break you And they watch you fall Do you even try to fight? To speak up at all?   Or have you been silenced? By the mocking And the pain   When they knock you down again
You are beautiful, You are love, You are worhy   You are worhy of love that you cannot even begin to comprehend. This love is everlasting, unconditional, unfailing, never ending.
Never spare a passing glance, 
She stands, head hanging With an unbearable grin Happiness is dead
Stuck in the dark, so bland and dry.Tired of remarks, so full of lies.Shutting it out, yet in it seeps.Without a doubt, too many emotions to keep.
High on life, feel so joyous No more strife, lovely world so glorious Darkness descends, enveloping joy Unable to mend, this overlapping ploy
The pain you cause her, is it worth it? You don't know her, her life, her story or her thoughts.  Why is it so fun to cause her pain? What if she goes home and get the same tourment?
No matter how long it's been,
Walking down the hall, is like being on display. People point and laugh, every day. The fact and the matter is, is that this is not okay. I know that I can't be the only one who has anything to say.
Your words no longer faze me, they can’t hurt me. I cried at night you made me hate me. Your words cut, cut so deep I watched myself bleed. You with your pretty hair and your perfect skin how can I fight back.
A lot of people wonder why I’m so concerned on listening to people’s problems and respecting people.
  Teasing  Teasing  Teasing
Dear Soceity,  You need to stop with these lessons, Where young girls are forced to see How imperfect their bodies can be. How sex is a tool for sucess,  How breasts are ment for something so much less.
If I jumped they wouldn't miss m
Do not be fighterDo not be curse that person or animal outinstead be a peacemakerDo not steal a thing that you really wantDo not kill that person
We live in a world where double standards bloom around us Waiting for the picking  Like fresh lillies in the spring time. If you have acne, you're ugly If you don't, you're stuck up.  
Every abuse is not a physical pillUnless you’re unwise and unskilledThese tones stone the insidesOf happiness and eventually toss youTo shame and leave you fearing any game 
Kick me when I’m down And tell me I don’t matter I want to feel I belong That’s all I ever asked Now really can you blame me
For reasons unknown, she didn't feel happy.She'd spend days wondering why life was this crappy.Her friends would tell her that she was their light.But how could someone so sad, be so bright?
It's a cold dark lonley night I'm looking outside my window. Everything is still. No sound, no movement, eveything is gray as thoughts run through my head. 
The difference in me is great, the becoming of my life will bring me to my fate, the mysterious I have for myself brin
Why
As she walks through the halls the whispers get louder she's listening her tear drops glistening your telling her she's not good enough some say she's not hood enough she's debating
I walk alone, my head hanging down;
Things aren't always black and white,  There’s always a tint of grey. Someone's always watching.... judging, It happens every day.   Teachers never see it,
  Everyone seems to hit a point When everything starts going right,
In the shadows I sit Away from the crowd, A class full of voices My own starts to drown.   From class to class I rush and hide From room to room I stumble and cry,
Run baby run Don't ever look back. They'll tear you apart If you give them the chance
It's really a funny thing, people assume  those who are the sadest: never smile
If only they knew , if only i could say..i hate coming to school everyday. Not because of the lunch, or the switching my class rush.
 I am reaching out to youBut you cannot or will not hearCan’t you see that I am in need?You look without seeing my tears I am so lonesome. All by myself
you will never know unless you are in that persons shoes
 It can come on slow and it can come on fast   Sometimes you’d never know it’s even happening Your palms start to sweat and your heart is about to burst
Used to be friends our first year Fast-forward, I’m standing here Halls are deserted, no one in sight Here you come from behind and body check me on the right   That’s how it started
She may have finally done it She may have finally found her path   The sky blue comforter was appealing, But with deep thought, She found that its arms of cotton, Its pillows of visions of fantasy,
There's a saying. It's quite old. There's a saying. That's often told. "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words with never hurt you" I don't believe that this is true.
Do you still care Since I know you don't believe You could say "there's no angel Watching over me" But that's where you're wrong I know your faith may have died But I'm still your angel
Let her alone                                                                                You don't want to go in that zone She's a freak of nature
  She was a very young girl Life just started it would seem About fifteen years old Life being torn by the seams
She stands speechless as the colors dribble down the wall
I'm a glass house. Just take a glance, you'll know if I'm home or not Maybe a light is on, music is playing Peer a little deeper to be sure that I'm not Survey my windows to see if you can find me,
Gnawed on pencils, annoyed expressions, Everyone had their own confessions. Yet, here we were, sitting, pretending to care, About the lives of others, like it was even fair. Judgment and the shifting of eyes,
Rejected  
On the nights I lay in bed not feeling tired at all, are the nights I begin to ponder. Pondering, Pondering, I ponder the night away, not caring that daybreak is close at hand.
Slipping soundless.
Living in darkness seemed  the best way Light never reached my face as I lay As the fabric of life seemed to fray   Hateful words spoken in spite Light was no longer in my sight
A young girl is brokenThat poor girl shed tearsThe little girl is leavingNo one even hears Crying, she falls asleep at nightWaking up seems to be a curseNo one ever loves herMaybe its time to go home
There is no day that goes by I feel angry with the world I sit quietly in my room I pray for a better tomorrow… How would my life be Without fear and sadness? How would it feel to be
Reaching out, gripping your hand with mine, Muscles stretching, tendons straining to hold on. My grip is starting to slip away; I Won't Let Go. Your memories entrenched within my mind,
You really don't know when the end comes, the end of anything. I felt everything I needing to feel, craving to feel and it's sharp heel digging into my skull, I never asked, but was worthy enough for it.
Maybe it's time, that I give you a simple rhyme.  A reason to listen, as my eyes glisten.  I'm tired of the lies, those that binds and ties; my very soul from becoming whole.  I may not be the poster child, but I wasn't raised up wild.  Don't mock
My life has not been easy. But that never has brought me down Whe never they said that I couldn’t do it.I proved them wrong. Working hard never letting go...
    Your thumbnails are very beautiful, I’m sure you think so too; You must be very proud of them, gorgeous, pink, and small; I can tell you love them very much, because staring at them is all you do.
Say what you want, do as you please for I know that whatever you doin ain't gonna happen to me. You can scowl,snarl, and glare but I'm untouchable like the air. You may say your wicked taunts and do your evil
Isolated from your peers, alone and rejected, different from the others, you feel diseased, infected.    it's impossible to change everyone,  difficult to get it through their heads,
  Chains Chains clinking metal frozen wrists bound reaching for freedom no key to set me free or strength to uncuff
Sticks and stones break bones, And they aren't always alone,  Cause sometimes words hurt even more, Leaving behind a heart truly sore, And beating three beats behind, 
I am the ugly sister. These are the words I can’t escape. I cannot escape the rejection, or the hate. I am the one that no one comes to claim. My sister says the muffin top will go away, that I need to work harder.
Your subtle whispers  scream in my ears exclaming hate pronounce my fears I can see your staring eyes looking through me judging, spreading rumors lies But I am strong 
ou claim to know me. Yet you don’t see my pain, my suffering, my black, shriveled up excuse for a heart. All you see is the smile, the overweight child, the kid that sits alone at lunch. You claim to know me.
Cradled by solitude Because of other's attitude Death, depression, and disfigurement do a bully make Leaving destruction in wake. Take a soul, bottle it up Pour out a wretched thing.
Standing in a room full of people We exchange fake smiles This is something we are all so familiar with Our individual thoughts silenced Silenced by ourselves We laugh It seems so real
Day inDay out
All my life I've been silent, Never let out a peep Even when tumbling down hills, rough and steep Before I cry out in pain, I hear my mother's voice Hush! Be quiet. Don't complain   When I go to church
Because The Sound Of Voice & My Lips Were Close ! You Told Me Just Repeat "Strawberry" My Heart Beat 100 Miles per hour! Not Knowing How and When To Say it ! Poor Child only 9years old !
She’s kind Though she never really says much She smiles Though it never really seems real She laughs Though she never really seems to enjoy being around She’s here, doing what she has to do faithfully
  Tears like rain fill oceans of sadness; It’s the pain that we hide – greater than we see; I’ve spoken to broken looking for suns to soak in, But the heart is missing Where a soul leaves space.  
What’s a beginning? The first, a start? For I believe in no beginning to this art. I have written these same words, felt these same feelings. I have painted these same problems and colored in my same solutions.
You
You are a part of me my framework, my skeleton I can fell you slip from me my own fault like a blanket slips from my fingertips  as I drift unconscious I have far too many memories of you.
There exists a never ending void So dark, dense and utterly devoid. No sound or light escapes this place. It has born you and will erase.   It will start early and will start young
Today I was anxious and in a rumble,  but I tried to stay positive and not stumble. I looked out the window and saw the blues, the grays, whites and greens,
The past,  the present, loom together to torture. I can't even seem to remember, or even able to consider, the future. Everything is wrapped together in a maze,  the past, present, future, it's all the same. 
It’s 3am and I can hear myself breathing but I’m questioning the breaths. What if I told you that I’m not really here? I am just a blurry vision in the mirror where I slice my wrists and hold them up to God.
Dark temptations, in my mind its crazy a woman whose pregnant said its mine im waisted on some ... told her to abort, shes worried but said this seeds thats inside is chosen
It surrounds me, It smothers me, It hides me, It even protects me...   Without it I can do nothing With it I can do nothing In my time of need it lifts me up
I dont want the scars  to represent the weakeness  I aquired.  I dont want them  to be a false representation.  They do not define who I am.  They should not tell you
The rigor of staying sane is hard to steady, especially when the rain falls harder for those minds not ready.
Cold steel touches warm skin. This time I hope the blade wins... Sharp edge touches bare skin. The slice feels like nothing more than the prick of a pin...   Drop by drop crimson appears... 
People think me strong. I know that I am weak. People think me wise. I know that I am foolish. People think me happy. I know that despair has taken over my life. People think they know. They have no idea. They don't know my mistakes.
Watching stains on the sidewalk.. Listening to the birds talk, - Mind's Gone. No one with the words to say.. or listen to the words I say, - I'm Alone. Soft whispers of those who hate..
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