emotions
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I don't wanna feel this wayGod, take this pleaseIt's like a heavy black cloud has settled on meA weight on my shoulders that I just can't liftEvery decision I make feels wrongAlways second guessing
have you ever whispered
affirmations to yourself in the
waning hours of night
knowing in your heart
you are dying?
you learn to
semi-conciously compact
and contort the agony
What's Look Got To Do With It?
This poem is dedicated to you. Miss. Gorgeous Tina Turner
You must comprehend that you turned heads at every corner
I sink into a whirlpool, fears coming, is it all a tool?
They drag me down with fake resolves, I wonder, am I just a button doll?
I need her smiles.
Joyful.
Meaningful.
I hear her laugh.
Heart-warming.
Delicate.
I watch her face.
Prepossessing.
Emotional.
I see her hands.
Thunder;
sounds that cut the humid air and tell us Lightning is here, along with my storm.
Lightning;
only striking once, soon leaving an ever-lasting mark.
Here's a tree that only I knew,
Its roots deep in my heart it grew,
A symbol of my hidden truth,
A friend that saw me through my youth.
Its leaves were like my every dream,
Be brave enough to walk away
And don’t look back
Be brave to say goodbye
Be brave enough to go your way
Be brave not to tell a lie.
Recuerda ayer
Recuerda los viejos tiempos
Recuerda lo que solíamos decir
Recuerda las jugadas
Life swings in oscillating intentions
With inking hearts and linking receptors
Where life has met hell and heaven of emotions
life is always changing
and sometimes it can feel like chaos
when you have to divide yourself
into pieces to get your shit done
Till you know the softness of rocks and feebleness of mountains
Till you know hardness behind watery concrete
Days joy charmed her to merry
Never have I found curves and curls spin to glory
Every course of aura sailed to eternity
El amor es un sueño que comienza
El amor es una quimera que comienza
Es una bailarina que baila
Es un poeta que piensa
I Write my poems freely on the walls of the room
By looking natural sky through window's eyes,
The stars may add their beauties so me bloom;
My face is flattened as lonely air that flies.
Everything's so loud
How do I drown it all out?
Drown out all the emotions
All the pilling school work
Drown out the yelling parents
Everything
Drown out everything
I could really get lost in those pretty brown eyes.Bright,Warm,And mischievous at timesI see how you be lookin’ at me with them eyes—Sending me messagesGot my emotions going in every direction.
Bitter nothing passed these lips
as words poured towards you in silent riffs.
A melody of sour times
the money good s, the smell of muscidimes
Serene breezes flow through us
‘are you okay?’ they ask, and i reply,
‘really, why are you worried? i swear, i’m fine.’
but i know that i’m really not okay
that this is all a mask, a pretty face
Life is big long emotion
It’s an unpredictable roller coaster
Sometimes people fall off the ride
They don’t land on their feet
While others are just fine
Sometimes we smile at strangers
My reflecting face in the mirror
Reflects your face in my eyes
When I feel your shadow occupying my lonesome
I can feel the lows and highs
Don’t let a heavy heart from loving tomorrow
We must stand up and love for ourself
Put everything aside
Hug ourself
The little me is crying inside of me
I am ignoring because I despise me
I know writers say
Love can happen twice
But what if the
love never really happens ?
What if the emotion we thought
Now The ... " Potion Of Emotion " ...
Can Cause Quite A Commotion ... !!!
And NO Folks I’m NOT JOKING ... !!!
From People Out There Voting ...
To Things That Some Be Quoting ... !!!
your golden-brown skin is warm and inviting.
on the outside i stay cool and collected --
freezing my feelings so i'll never crack.
but on the inside,
I.
My mind is a juggernaut
of dirt and steel.
My hands on your body,
the arbiter of all that is real.
With tears that fall
like the spider crawls,
1.
Today,
I’m going to build a sky,
pink and purple and flayed
with the wretched stains of existence.
For this dawn burns my eyes
with the temporal nature of living.
1. Poetry Grafted Onto Starlit Bodies
Focused moments,hot breath tickling receptive ears.
1.Humbled intoa simple speck of star,
basking in the glowof a girl with a galaxy wide smile,
1.Exquisite exhalationssmash viciously against uslike wave after wave of ravenous,jailbreaking, thunderhearted Tsunamis
I accidentally filled her mindwith serenading cicadasthat erupted on El Dia De Los Muertos,a piñata swarm of insects,their nightmarish candy formseating away all the love in the universe,
I roll a blunt and sink deep in my thoughts. I smoke a blunt until I get rid of all of my thoughts. Clouds of smoke then I feel nothing at all.
Glass spiraling down, and everything seems slow motion. A high pitched crash as glass shatters is a perfect example of my emotions.
I eased my eyes wide open
As the day had already started
My uneasy mind is stranded
Lingering effects from last night’s last call
The nights are hard to handle
And the pills are hard to swallow
i hope that someday i can change
not just for a moment
but true change
when i don’t feel these things
when i can overlook those words which have disrupted my peace
i thought i would feel peace
but all i feel is chaos
slipping deeper into the black
falling from anyone’s grasp
as the seconds continue to pass
i thought they would come and go
but dark thoughts have come to stay
the light has become dimmer
and the faint glow continues to be overpowered
were those promises ever true
i am no longer sure
this emptiness has remained in me for too long
your words do not bring me comfort anymore
we have rejected every single form
of rules we were taught to obey
my soul feels different when you are around,
like hands being held together
thats what love is, against all odds
Raging sea, inside of me. Inside my mind I'll forever be. Anger turns to madness. Joy turns to sadness. I crumble and fall. I grasp and I claw; and yet, still I lose it all. I beg and I crawl. Please take this pain away, I plead.
When my back hurts,
It’s because I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders,
Your story isn’t over;
It’s the beginning of a new chapter;
A new chapter where you are the hero
But still your own villain;
Why do we love?
Sometimes it feels like it’s pointless
Love to be hurt
Then why do we start?
We start to feel it
That same joyous feeling
You tell me you want to talk, but you don't mean it.
You tell me you're happy to see me, but you don't mean it.
You tell me I'm special, but you don't mean it.
My anxiety comes
with its own background music;
DUN DUN DUN.
It marks itself present
with bitten nails and
peeled skin around it.
And that's when my
nightmares begin.
there are always those songs,that you listen to when you’re sad,because they sum up how you feel entirely
it feels like they wrote it for you,about your existence
I think the worse thing is imagining what I feel for you right now
isn't what they call love,
True Love.
It's an inflamed obsession,
more temporary, something that'll fade overtime.
We ask the question,
Why lie?
Well you see,
We aren’t the only ones being lied to
Everything is lies
You say I'm like water
That can mean many things
Water can be smooth and calm
Gentle, cool to the touch
Water doesn't stay in one place
It doesn't settle down much
The little people in my head never go away.
There’s anxiety,
Finding the negative in the outside world.
My pulse is faint.
My mind is spinning.
My skeleton is shaking.
My muscles are weakening.
I can feel my breath being restricted
From my rib cage tightening its grasp around my lungs
If only I could control my life,
maybe it wouldn't be so hard to survive,
I'd burn my memories into ashes that fall to the sea,
and delete my feelings like a flash drive or on a CD,
The ones so fearful of losing power so many centuries ago
Saw beautiful creatures times two, such a grand foe
This is where it began, the treachery to split the souls in half
The heart,
that craves the taste of being intoxicated
but by love,
The poison, is it the cure or the end?
The taste of insanity
it remembers so vividly,
my flesh, my strings
my bones, my veins
Birds sing and children sing. Time passes by, as I wait here to die. This mortal flesh turns to dust. Enjoy life we must. But how can I? When I wish to end this suffering. All this pain that goes unseen. Laying beneath the stary sky.
Christ within, Christ without. To the heavens I scream and shout. Inside my head I should find no doubt. But inside a bed, there it lay. Forever it wish to stay. My heart, it hopes to sway. To bring about my own dismay.
A poem dedicated to you, mama.
When did it begin?
When did I begin to resist your kisses, your hugs, your love?
When did I stop seeing you as a beautiful person?
but an ugly fat lady?
I am from Starbucks and skinny girls in mansions.
I am from can I feel your hair and is it real ?
Like a snake curled to strike
In the dark it hides
Coiling tightly to its prey
My depression is like a sweater.
Sometimes too big of my problems.
But sometimes too tight, where
I find myself grasping for air.
No one else can wear it,
even if they ask to borrow it.
Days grow longer, nights colder;
Everything seems to change. Yet, there’s still me-
I’m unchanging.
Same face, same clothes, same friends, same creation.
Days grow longer, nights colder;
Everything seems to change. Yet, there’s still me-
I’m unchanging.
Same face, same clothes, same friends, same creation.
I don’t want to be quiet anymore,
(that really bothers me.)
I want to fill the silences and make people smile.
I don’t want to be lost anymore.
I wish I knew where I was going, jumping on trampolines and through the gardens of my thoughts.
I have loved everyone. I did.
I prowl the internet late at night and
everyone tells me it’s terrible for sleep
but I do it anyway.
I learn a lot from the late-night internet and
"Howdy" he wrote
From a mere click my life changed
He made me realize that emotional connections are worth it
That he's worth it
The pain and worrying that he might not be safe
It's all worth it
I took my head from off the glass,
My nose plastered at an unatural point,
I take a deep breath and swallow,
The ice crystals forming on my eyelashes.
I keep my head up, and after class,
I'm a grown-up now.
And I do grown-up things.
Like pay my taxes, cry at night,
And wear engagement rings.
And I'm a grown-up now.
So I only watch the news,
I drown unfamiliar feelings,
It was a looming figure,
the shapeless ones you see
in the dark enshrouded by a halo;
A halo with no recognizable source.
It was a ravenous beast
It was a looming figure,
the shapeless ones you see
in the dark enshrouded by a halo;
A halo with no recognizable source.
It was a ravenous beast
A little while ago, I met someone special.
At the time I didn't realise what was going on inside me.
An emotion I hadn't felt before.
I didn't understand it to begin with.
I almost ignored it really.
I am in love with the rain.
The way it cleanses my heart,
and soaks up my pain.
The way it relieves me from the draining sunlight
that had burned up all my emotions and left me a barren wasteland.
There's nothing so much that scares me more,
Than the soft and prickly things that start small,
In the cracks of humanity, growing like sponges,
I gazed at the ocean, just to see your face.
Shift the tides with a smile, the definition of grace,
Do even you know what's behind the mask you where?
Or are you a victim of your own existential dispair?
Acting out emotions may delve into extremities
Throwing knifes of truth
And bullets shredding thin
Ricochet
Ricochet
Ricochet
I will be The Judge,
You will be The Jury.
I’ll believe in the happy never-afters
and the long-forgotten fables.
Rebut me as much as you like,
Jury.
. . . right
away, you’ll see it’s difficult to find:
(That -- while it’s true, it’s only You able to see inside your, Mind, -- )
Lost thoughts often become begotten
I've got creatures caged in my mind.If I look, they are easy to find.To others though, is not so clear.They only hear what I let them hear.Most of the time these creatures are tame.
There has been dark days
we all had bad times
most of us truly just wanna run
in our own shadows away,
I wish she tasted like cherry
A hopeless, cliche, passion
So I don the cherry chapstick
For a bittersweet illusion
Her velvety lips are strawberry
I don't mind strawberry
The hold that you had found in my veins,
was not found without warning.
It was preceded by a feeling
That weighed heavy in my chest.
I feel it begin, the drip drop of the rain,
The ominous storm, soon to devour my soul,
My heart screams denial, it crushes my chest,
The hot rain beats down, I lose all control,
I pushed you away thinking you would fade away
but you didn’t…
I thought I didn’t want to remain with you, almost avoided you
but nothing was true…
I wanted to explore dating guys to find out all the lies
The yellow man under the drawbridge saw that I was lost so
He asked me for my phone number today
For the third day in a row
But I said no because it wasn’t the fifth.
Death, death, all around.
Not making a peep, not making a sound.
It's not death coming for me that I fear.
It's death coming for the people that I hold most dear.
To live a life without someone you love is scary.
In your dreams,
He's there
Closer than ever
In your mind,
He's there
Far away
In reality,
He's there
Beside you
Wishing to be closer.
K N
Umm, are you loving the feeling of tantalizing my soul
Under the covers our bodies entwining, infusing, desire uncontrolled
Passion contoured, twisting, feelings sinking, my essence consoled
I've seen things I never meant to see
And dreamed of places I'll never go
With you
Well, maybe you're just an archetype
But not the soul sent to save mine
From you
Push me too far and I will tumble over the
edge
Make my heart stop and
I'll listen to what he says.
As much as I'd love to stay and chat
The more you pull me in, the next step I take
back.
This, a River
This, a river,
I am not lines but curves
Winding around sand bars
Creating islands
Revealed in low tide
My current pulses life
Tadpoles, carp, algae
I smile in light
Emotions are needed, why do I feel like they're stupid.
All this crying, what's the point.
Why feel pain if it's the past.
Why not see the brighter days.
Some feel less than others,
I'm not going to lie.
Sometimes adults underestimate me.
I'm not going to brag,
But I'd like to think that I'm a little more mature than my peers.
Yet I'm always told that I "would never understand."
The cool air slithers through your shirt.
The water soaks your face in vitality.
Your foot throbs with invisible hammers
The dark clouds shadow your happiest day.
These are just sensations.
No Rules
Poetry doesn’t have rules
Just like life
It has guidelines that almost everyone follows
Of course
To be successful
You must follow the rules
Or so they say
Or so I tell myself
Poetry is the essence of ones mind,
it is the whispers of the soul.
Poems speaks words so loud,
you can feel the raw emotion.
The words awaken my spirit
that affects my mind, my body and my soul.
Power to the fist
Power to defeat
Power to challenge
Vested in a pen, a pencil, a feather was the power to plaster my emotions
Doesn’t sound too strong but let me fill you in on a secret
It is
Poetry,
So simple a word that creates sentence,
These sentences turn into verses,
Those verses form a story,
And within the story you learn about the writer.
You read their emotions,
When everything around me is dark and meaningless
Yet on the inside I feel a burning brightness
My emotions so strong
So incendiary
That they light my heart on fire
Listen to that voice
There is importance in following
These pages enclose the words my heart holds
If I enacted the things I feel I could heal
Our generation acts as if emotions are no big deal
Poetry has always seemed to be in my life, in my blood even
My father is a poet, for my mother at least
He wrote them when he was happy when my mother was pregnant with me
I never feel like I belong anywhere and I always feel as though I'm in someone else's space. I don't think this is the way I am suppose feel, I miss being secure and stable in the person I was.
New Year’s with my family,
Save one member.
Valentine’s with my family,
Save one member.
Easter with my family,
Save one member.
Spring Break with my family,
Save one member.
When you don’t know what to say,
Poetry is there.
She takes your unsaid words,
Rearranges them, changes them,
And puts them on paper.
Poetry guides the pen,
Self-expression is something that has always been difficult for me.
I never know the right words to say so others can truly see
the troubles that I face and the emotions that I feel.
Red is fear,
Flashing through your eyes as it grows near.
Orange is enthusiasm,
Delightfully returning the witts of sarcasm .
Yellow is happiness,
we are made to feel,
to feel anguish,
to feel demented,
to feel happiness,
but the hardest thing to feel
is numb,
to feel numb is to find the beauty
in the simplicity
The emotions you feel seep into me.
The ideas you share sway me.
I hope that you see it impacts me greatly.
I am no longer just me.
The ideas you share sway me.
I now believe what you believe.
Speechless, words do not flow about how I feel
Lost like ashes in the wind nothing I see appeals
Heart ripped, battered and sore with the sledgehammer
I trusted you once, twice, but not again with your disruptive manners
Why do I struggle to remain with my brain unstifled?
Emotions running wild; how long can I stay intact, I don't even feel human.
My heart's going black.
dsdThe feeling of butterflies A dead body being surrounded by funeral flies A well made bed A bullet in your head Candles all around The king being crowned The usurper and the dethroned Death take us all The spirits look at logic, appalled In the
So many tears
I have shed
Throughout my life
But there are
Many that I didn't
Know how to
Those ones I held in
All came out at once
In the form of a panic attack
I'm like a bottle of soda, I look still & calm until you open me up & have emotions and words rise to the top, being spilt all over the floor because you couldn't hold me still..
Life in silence is indeed no lifeLife in silence is constant strifeLife in silence, suffering is rife
I am in love with the lines on your face,
A decade of wearing you down.
Emotions run like rushing water,
Engraining caverns of joy and pain,
Of thoughtfulness and contemplation
Of a million experiences
Anger
Hate
I want to be
I want to do
But I can't
Because it's you
You make me feel these things
Things I can't control
And all of them different
Love
Hate
Anger
Here is a quick poem about emotions.
Why the fuck do they exist?
I feel so much at once and I want to end it.
Can I end it? Not just the emotions but my whole life?
I feel so pathetic even talking about this strife
Dear frustration,
To my most frequent feeling,
Who comes along with anger,
Who comes along with stress,
Who makes me abandon what I’m doing.
Dear rose,
A hero that carries us all—
Willing to caress us with a tender heart.
Your sweet embrace is what holds lost pieces together.
The Valley of the Rose.
Dear soul,
Pain is inevitable, suffering is a figment of your imagination
All of that hatred, all of that frustration
It’ll control you like a corporation
Dear Heartbreak,
You're disintegrating me.
All of my feelings of happiness
are gone. It's been months...
why keep torturing me? You're
driving me to complete agony.
I wish the pain of betrayal and
Dear Happiness,
Why do you cease to exist
and yet are eternally present at the same time?
What is the reason that you are far away
as soon as the thought of you comes forth in my mind
my whole body tingles
and i feel like i'm holding my breath
patiently waiting
for any semblance of love you throw my way
Dear What You've Done in the Light
You know,
I’m always the one
Always, always, always the one
To try and keep the dying embers of ‘us’ alive.
I always fail
Dear Mr. Blue Eyes,
The vulnerability that you bring out in me is unheard of
but it is a feeling I am slowly learning to love.
There’s no way you don’t see the effect you have on me
Dear Anger
You seem to be ever present
Everywhere I turn, you are there
You push me
You pull me
You put me in situations that I never wanted to be in
Everything I am is tied to my stomach. I feel everything so intensely; sometimes, I feel the wind get knocked out of me. I am convinced there’s a little girl in my heart pulling the strings from up above.
dear the one who feels like home
when we were together
you looked straight into my ocean of a heart
and relieved me of some of its weight
some of its noise
Do you think about me the way I do about you?
Do you reminisce about the past we once shared?
I await the day when I can hold your hand again and smile because of our love
Do you think about me, too?
I am naught but a windblown thought
And nobody can see the wind
Only the mark it leaves on the world
I know that you don't remember.
I know that my name is a just a whisper that your lips used to say.
Now all that is left is an empty shell.
All your memories of me shall forever be sealed in time.
Teardrop smile,She rolls with grace.Sad.Happy.Angry even.It rolls with grace,Your teardrop smile.
Dear Jumbled Emotions,
Rage rolls like electricity, sparking
And cracking like a child in wooly socks
Rubbing her feet on a fleecy carpet.
It’s an odd feeling, so powerful, yet
Dear Hate, I hate you. Always have, always will.I hate how you ensnare, trap, and tangleand like a fly I danglein your web of red hot anger.I hate how you make me crumple li
To that tree on the hill
On that lonesome hill
That saw me fight
My spirit killed
That saw me rise
And roll through my free will
I think it was love at first sight
I liked you before but seeing you again
today,
it was like seeing you for the first time,
if I didn't love you before, I definitely loved you now
Dear Pain,
There are things that need to be said
but the words always seem to run
There are actions that ought to be taken
but the rhythm seems undone
The tears appears all dried up
like the seats on the bus in the morning,
be occupied
be taken up with warmth
with different stories
and different perspectives
be overpopulated
because when the takers come to take
i think i heard him creep again that creature in my headthe one that keeps me up at nightwishing i was dead
Feet hitting light thuds on the ground as you continue on, faster, faster
Your lungs burn forests as you breathe, harder, harder,
What made you go this time?
Was it ambition? Was it fear?
a hammer wrecking my being.
voices shouting, blaming.
rightfully do.
shooting words like bullets.
worthless
insensitive
apathetic.
'its all your fault'.
My eyes blur,
nails dig into my palm.
thoughts weigh on me.
drowning me
into the depths
of trepidation.
There you are
where I could always admire from afar
See your light, Its radiant colors
Melting into the ocean waters
Here I am
I don’t know why I say the things I do.
Why I continue to put myself out there after all I’ve been through.
I guess I’m a bit of a hopeless romantic some would say..
I believe in true love and hope to find it one day.
Ever wanna just get away,find a place to stop and think?
Somewhere alone with your thoughts, so in your mind you can sink.
Soak in the beauty of your surroundings,and enjoy the view.
Dear Impulsiveness,
I think its time we had a little chat
Oh no, don’t talk back, this is MY time to chat
God I wish you never got involved
In my little bottle I gather up my rays of sunshine,my rays of happiness and glee.In my little bottle I gather up my friends and family.In my little bottle I stop negativity from entering,
Dear men in my life,
There is so much chaos running through my body
Through my veins,
Through my mind,
Through my soul.
Where can I go
To find true peace and happiness?
Love
Spring, summer, fall, winter
Joy, passion, love, reality
Seasons and emotions are one in the same
Everybody has a favorite season
Everybody has their own reason
But the one thing that stays true
"You have neat eyes"
Said one of the sweetest guys
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me"
He was as sweet as can be
"When we get married..." he would always say
When did that feeling go away?
“No one loves you like I do”
The words that once seemed lovely
Burrow into the crevices of my mind
Right next to “you’re not good enough” and “you’ll never achieve anything”
“No one loves you like I do”
It truly is
A beautiful thing
To be able to
Identify myself in someone
Whose appearance is none like my own
We are all different
Yet equally similar
And that relaly is
I'm splitting apart
Every version that I've been
Wants to weigh in
Romance takes her chance
There's a gem of a truth
I can believe in
My skin used to be an armor
and as courageous as I seemed
it was all just this facade
that made sleep make me feel like I could be redeemed.
But I was lost
and I wasn't me.
There you go again
You think you can get to me
but you can't.
I’m impossable.
Isn't that right?
I mean, it's not like I listen to your every word
Love is a rush of emotions
like the current of oceans
it is the color pink and red
where one’s feelings are said
Love lets one fly
in the sky up high
where freedom is everywhere
they never saw the real me
the one i hid away in my closet
buried with the things i hid from society
tied her up and taped over her mouth so no one would hear her scream
i remember being happy
As I'm lying in bed
He'll touch me with gentle fingers,
Carefully knitting together the tattered ends of my heart,
The places where my soul has been frayed.
There will be nights when I think the sun may never rise
I dont wanna cry.
I dont wanna lie about what happened in my past anymore.
I dont wanna wake up in the morning and see the same
face that hurts me everyday.
I dont wanna see the sun anymore.
You don't need to do this, she said
No, it’s fine! I replied. I want to, I said
Because I love you, I thought.
You don’t have to if it’s too much trouble, he said
I Am Not My Skin
But why I can't I be, if being black is my reality I take it with pride and just let it be.
We don't get to choose our complexion, but we still need affection.
Look at her bright and cheery face,
dotted with tears that intertwine and lace.
Is she happy? Is she sad?
Does the fact you cannot tell make you mad?
A superficial glance at her,
the eyes confuse and obscur.
I saw you todayAnd my heart flipped out of my chestLater that night I couldn't rest.Months after getting over youThere I was back in your graspAnd now I reminisce about our past.
It has started, the final battle.
This struggle of emotions,
that slowly takes over
Everything comes to halt, a stand still,
a dead puls, all the struggle
But it should not hurt this much.
Here we are,
Sitting here,
fingers intertwined,
purple ribbon around your neck,
dull knife at my throat.
Can we keep up this deadly game?
Playing around,
with our emotions,
There are days when I feel
Alone,
That no one simply cares.
Perhaps if I were to die their lives would be on pause.
For a moment,
And maybe, just maybe they would grieve
What's it like to be hurt
The feeling isn't what we usually crave
Neither of two sides of a fight wins
The whole world feels like it's about to end
The adrenalin being ruhsed into the veins increases
A small bottle
A brush
Heavy paper
Covered in crevices
And teeth
Pressure
It takes pressure
Hello my name is talent
i often live in fear
i'm scared i don't have courage
and my path is so unclear
Hello my name is Lonely
i'm often found in smiles
i hide behind your laughter
Love
is a broken promise,
signing away your life.
Trying to find
clarity;
instead, finding strife.
Too fullToo empty,I'm all dried up,these bones feel heavy I can't breathe,I can't think,I can't even talk,I don't know what's come over me I'm a slave to a vice,it's killing me,I often think
Weather Forecast
Feeling the emotions.
Feeling the difficult notions.
Moving like the different oceans.
Flowing slow, medium, and fast.
What I hate is how I don't love you but how I don't hate you,
And I don't even like you yet I don't despise you
But you ruined me
I was never a masterpiece to begin with
The pain and agony you feel
Oh I know it's all so real
I've been there just like you
Feeling like you can't push through
I was pathetic.I was lost.I wasn’t me anymore…. because of you.
I would indulge in..I would desperately seek.I would want…. alcohol because of you.
Nighthorse Chan
1/19/17
I look at the person I was a year ago.
Contemplating if I changed… I don’t know.
And that I realize
When I look into the eyes
Of the boy that evolved to a man who has grown.
Your absence hurts me
Why can’t you be by my side?
Mentally killing me
Why are people cruel?
Insecurities haunt me
Please just let me be
2016 was my year of discovery
and it wasn't just
discovering friends or anything superficial like that
not to say
that friends are superficial
but anyways
2016
was the year i started discovering
Elementary days, drama was not a factor,I met the love of my life and a best friend that wouldn't tell,My secrets, my crushes, my dreams, and my lifestyle,Pinky promises were meant to last forever.
Faces aren't the sky,
Saying they change in 12 hours is a lie.
Lie down and think
Think about how long it takes
One hour,
One day,
Cast away the fire
throw away the flame
are you growing tired?
feel nothing but the pain
place it on the pyre
your demons are to blame
mirrors are reminders
of the beast you cannot tame
Katrina DeKett
Papered Love Poem
999.
1 more and peace.
Half over half, color side up.
1 more and peace.
I knew a boy who liked to paint,
each piece a tessselation,
a labyrinth
of color and jagged edges.
Some so loud
I cowered, hands over ears,
others hushed
like petals on a flower
falling.
scared confused happy
anticipatory worried nervous fragile
elated euphoric dazed
tired
exhausted
ready
Hello sister: i know you can see
the scars on my wrists
and the secrets hidden deep
Hello brother: i know you can see
how wounded i became
when you took your leave
Hello mother: i know you can see
keep saying that I look older
acting like you can bone
man I'm tired of dudes like you
that get girls with a phone
click the chat and text her up
whenever you feel lonely
What do I do?
What do I say?
Feelings
They are sharp
Poison-tipped arrows
The bow string is pulled tight
Soon it will release
They will harm
Anything they touch
Windows down
Engine's going
Music drowns the sounds of the roadside roaring
Leaving town
Songs are flowing
Music drowns the sounds of those left snoring
Melodic cloud
Alive and soaring
Some people say that cats are boring. Some people say that cats are lame. Some people say that are violent. Some even go as far to say they are not as good as dogs. Cats always make everything better to me though.
Where are you now?
You promised to always be by my side.
You promised to never leave
You said this day will never come
But yet, you had to leave
Why? Why are you gone?
What did I do wrong?
When the world is in its softest sleep, we are awake.
We are roaring down the highway
past city lights and nostalgic meadows.
We roll down the windows, and
a heavy petrichor fills the bitter cold air.
Often we find within us
that we can't explain what our troubles are
Such a bizarre confusion,
It makes the complaining of others our envy;
I am water,/Flowing and ebbing and dipping,/Murmuring a silent scream,/My emotions are like a waterfall/rushing, never stable./ I am the earth/Crumbling, shaking, tremoring,/Cold, warm/without voice, without choice,/Alone, and overrun./ I am fire.
A wag for a smile
A nudge for a pet
A lick for a laugh
A cuddle for a hug
A fetch for a ball
Would you look at that
I'm happy after all
Sad isn’t just a word you know?It’s an acronym for sadness, anxiety and depression.I describe it as a little pesticide, that can crawl into my mind Lay it eggs in other parts of the bodyI won’t eat, deprived from sleepFeel the need to love or have
When I fet like I could talk to no one,
You were there for me.
Through my troubling thoughts and feelings,
I could open up to you, Poetry.
My smile always plastered across my face in public
Ain't nothing was the same
Everthing started to change
You was gone
And I'm pointing fingers
Having no one to blame
Even tho you outta all the pain
Still in my selfish ways
Silence.
Violence.
Idelness.
Trying to hide;
to hide what I feel.
Its too easy to lie.
She'll eventually break.
They will finally all know
that her smile is fake.
It all started when I lost myself.
I wallowed in misery.
I had no self esteem.
I felt unloved, unworthy, and worst of all dead inside.
Like I was simply existing, without living at all.
I give my love my everything:
The nooks and crannies of my soul.
His mask then fell, unveiled a liar,
Spilled every secret: none untold.
Friends come, they go, all while they know
Poetry is a tuning fork,
it vibrates at an everlasting frequency.
Open the cork
allow the emotions to flow with leniency.
2016 in New York
a young girl reads appreciably,
I am at Peace.
Emotions, tend to be as fluid as most
Of the streams that pass through
The lush green forests
We hardly ever get to see with our own eyes.
Yes, I am at Peace,
What's the most important part of the outfit?
For some it is the shoe, the shirts, the hair
But for me, it won't simply be found anywhere.
You can't buy it in a store,
Nor have it tailored.
I have no one
No one has me
I am all alone
Stuck in a tree
The leaves are changing
The birds are singing
In comes new weather
That fall is bringing
I have no one
No one has me
Poetry is my escape.
Kind of like my outlet from the world.
Sometimes when I can’t express the way I’m feeling.
I connect with poetry, to release the issues that have been bothering me.
So many people going away. So many people going separate ways. Long friends, having to make amends. Great memories; Now having to say goodbye. Trying to stay strong and not cry.
The house, dark--locked doors
behind which secrets floated.
My emotions were like poison
to me and all others.
Weak, debased,
I turned to a place
where no one judged;
Rain,
Trickles down my window pane,
Reminding me that it's okay,
To cry sometimes.
Your brave face cracks like thunder,
Leaving you to wonder,
If it's okay to let it melt away,
I gave up on life too soon
And cried when I couldn’t go back.
Poetry has helped me
go back.
I am young and inexperienced
I make mistakes
I am unsure of the world and all its inhabitants
they say its normal and I will grew with time
but I feel that I will be always be young
I'm greedy;
I know it;
I quite like to show it
And although my dear mum might describe me as seedy
Deep down she just knows that I am very greedy.
I give gifts.
Release
Pent up, building, rising
About to break the dam
Emotions, feelings, stirrings of the soul
Relief
Flooding, washing, overflowing
From the rivers of abundant thought
I’ve spent countless hours of my life thinking and brooding,
Considering the complexities of my past relations.
And it is during these times, with my emotions moving,
Which cause more oft than not unsightly ruminations.
This day in particular
Was really quite gray
The guy next to me sighed
Hey, you okay?
I replied that I was fine
I gesured him to go away
Yet, he wiped the tears from my eyes
Does anyone else feel like they are useless? Did anyone else think they could be better?
Does anyone else hate themsleves more than their enemies could hate you? Did anyone else think they were loved this whole time?
Happiness is a newborn child
Written in the softest pastels
Ever stitched by crippled hands.
You try your hardest to hold it,
Not to upset it,
Simply obey and soothe it.
Lucy -
My love, what a rough day I've had
Take me into your arms and hold me tight
Don’t let me go till the morning light
Eyes wide
And stinging
With tears
Feeling so light
And heavy
Without fears
Warmth growing
And fertilized
By thanks
And gratitude
And a smile
Quiet but there
The sun shining happily, Warming the sandy stretch, Dipped into the swaying mass of Cold, salty water.
Love hurts they say
It cuts you deep to the core, I'm told
Remaining only is hurt and pain
Loneliness and emptiness creeps its way
All she asked
was a simple favor
A few words to end the problem
She did not intend to be the reason
The reason why there is blood
I am from fond memories made with him
from his smile that never leaves his face
I am from his tears
that form every night
for they cloud his eyes
from the thought of me
A glance too long in the
wrong direction. Addiction
seeps into my core.
Where is my fix?
Your
Mind much too far from mine,
I never thought there'd come the day
When I'd say what I need to say
Normally I wouldn't do it this way
But I need you to be understanding me right
It's this feeling of hatred and sadness combined with not wanting to get out of bed With not having the energy to do so anywayWith not being able to hold your food down With not being able to have control over your emotions. It's this feeling of
The darkness of this night envelopes me in its cruel hands
I'm swallowed in darkness - sinking into a black put that deflects light or even beauty
My heart is dashed into pieces
each becoming lost and forgotten.
“Evening Suns”
Twilight sets as a black night approaches
Stars twinkle passionately
“Morning Stars”
Crack of dawn greets us before noon is here
There's a warm group of pink pigs
roaming the unattended class rooms.
One little pink pig drifted off
due to the sweet aroma
of an unknown substance.
He then goes onto the kitchen
It is
The touch of her palms on
A beating heart
Toying with the
Malleable tissue
Of a passionate soul.
It is
Art lets me release my pent-up feelings,
Lets me take out my frustrations,
Lets me escape my malicious thoughts.
I need expression to clear my mind.
No other thing could replace the effects that
We are two havles of a whole,
two sides of a brain,
two atriums of a heart.
Without you,
I am broken,
a robot with no heart,
a robot without a soul.
With you,
I'm alive,
seagullsshriek toone anotherthey are open and honestand truelike human screams in conversationthe coarse sand plugging their throatssea salt wind and ice cream pavement
Something lives deep inside me
Something that hungers
Something that burns
Something dark and hot
It smolders
A rumbling deep inside
When I grow cold and empty
That’s when I feed it
I froze as time left,
the smile of her’s so sweet smile I kept.
I saw her walk away goodbye,
I tried reaching but couldn’t fight.
I was frozen in time.
tearing up inside me
fire and tigers and rage and roars
threaten to rip my limb from limb
but i don't have a word
i say i'm mad
i have that word i say i'm mad
Its like i want you to stay here an let my mind be at ease, but its hard to please when my heart is at need
She folds her emotions up
Sticks them in the bottom drawer
And puts something else on
To wear out in public all day
But when she gets home
She unfolds her emotions
The rocks beneath the earth that shelters the lava away.
The gravity that holds us inside of this earth day by day.
The people that try to help me even if I push them away.
How can I unlike you?
Unlove you. Unlearn you.
I want to forget you.
Unburden myself from you.
And just live my life.
But I feel like you’re a leech at my neck.
And I’m drained.
There's something I need to tell you,
My story is short enough to expose.
I am no saint,
I'm sorry
You cared so much
And I thought I did too
Now I miss your sweet touch
Though I was the one who left you
You weren't perfect
But nor am I
Give me one more poison kiss,
the damge is already done
Surely one more posion kiss,
won't rend your life undone
once again a poison kiss,
In your hand, there is a spot
In the middle of your palm
Where my heart sits
While you can squeeze
Here I stand,
Far from you.
In our hearts,
Emotions so few.
We speak and talk,
Whispering promises of love.
Yet the paved future
Washes away like chalk.
You try to help,
Here I stand,
Far from you.
In our hearts,
Emotions so few.
We speak and talk,
Whispering promises of love.
Yet the paved future
Washes away like chalk.
You try to help,
There’s this feeling in my chest
weighing me down
It makes me twiddle my thumbs
Bite my lip
and shake my leg
Do you ever get a feeling
My fingers wildly compose literary sheet music of emotions.
Scaling keystrokes somehow translate my inner entity and immortalizes it with words.
Hurt, Lonely, Sad, Disappointment
All connected in a way, a way you never wanna feel
Or for that mater experience
Hurt is the only thing i feel even though i try not to
Lonely describes me perfectly
I am erratic.
A giddy, round-eyed, five-year old.
A rocker who has too much soul.
Who cried when the wind blows the wrong way.
Who giggles incessantly at the break of day.
I punch the wall
I punch again
I want to feel it all
but I just can’t
The pain I get
inside my chest
Anger is an ugly thing
Sometimes it’s the only thing
Anger is never the answer
Especially for the smallest problems
It tends to reach us at the roughest times
I can no longer bare it
Release (English Sonnet)
There was something about his eyes
Like sadness crept in through his veins
Made home of his heart where it’d hide
Clouds of anger that swelled of rains.
Needles can stab and make holes,
Rocks can be thrown and make bruises,
As words can be said and make damages,
A heart can be tossed and break into tiny little pieces
I am not a brilliant creation
My ideas are my creation
Forced success are valued;
But give strength to dreams
This artist is prisoned,
In thoughts of grassy head.
Many things describes him,
But few expresses.
He is empty with childhood memories,
Away from freedom of another soul.
I stood at the edge of the Heaven with my angel wings spread wide
And as I looked down upon Earth I wondered how I died.
I don't remember who I was, who I wanted to be or who I am now,
Words Fall through me
They come out in droves
They burst and explode
Like a gas can that just got shot
violently
They trickle like a brook
that's been throttled by drought
When I was growing up, I imagined my life
A sparkling fairytale
A delicately blooming water lily upon the surface
Of my reality
Everything would be perfect, set and ready for me
The music speaks volume
crying out to live it all.
It begs and pleads with me.
Insisting I open my quiet heart.
With every rhythm, every beat
my heart expands, it opens.
My love for you will never cease,
a blessing or a curse may be.
My withered heart will forever dream
despite the havoc memories wreak.
Pain is fading as the nights retreat,
Be patient good things come to those who wait
Rushing speeds up negative vibes pushes you away
No holding back
Believe that's why my last relationship escaped
No excuses but we rushed despite the years
I'm losing my sanity,
Swore on my heart, by the devils profanity.
Sold my soul to heavens illusions,
Lost all hope in its shameful intrusions.
When you fantasize of that caress and places its never been
shiver at thoughts of hearing warm words you've never heard
ectasy you've never experienced
only to come down and realize you're your own surprise,
Feelings are a matter of perspective.
We can dwell on them, allow the waves to crash over our lives in crescendos of pain, euphoria, anger, and fear.
No one seems to understand
How amazing it is
To turn a word
Into an idea
And an idea
Into a possibility
On days of satisfaction I embrace the lights that illuminate our urban lifestyles
But on days of frustration I am capable of bending that light into fragile
reflections, which shed the truth amongst all creations
into an eternal abyss that no one even knows
how far will it take me? how far will i go?
When is the time to show emotion.
When is the time to hold everything inside?
Leaders are suppose to set the example.
When so many have been killed and wounded.
Is it alright to cry?
Breathe in, breathe out.
A rhythm to sleep's sweet song,
a dance that has no moves.
His body, my warmth.
His embrace for which I long,
frustrations of the day, all at once, I lose.
Being sick to me, iswaking up due to that small subtle crease in the bed causing
You know, there are moments in life when you just look at something that has happened and are disgusted by it. These moments happen far too often. It changes our view on life, and we become bitter for it.
Honest About My Emotions,
Maybe Too Honest For You.
I Am One Blunt Person,
That’s No Longer New.
A Killer For The Truth,
Look at this mess that I have truly made
I thought of you and then my heart decayed
For if I see that you can truly be
All mine you'll have a happy heart to keep.
It feels like I'm blind and cant see, like I'm stranded in the middle of the sea, like I'm submerged under water and can't breathe, like my sarrows are an obvious fact that no one will believe.
I am alone at the sea.
Bound by the wind.
I only go where it flows.
I've only been where it's been.
I am transferred to the desert.
Sit on top of sandy dunes.
The sun scorches my skin.
Seeing the sunrise peak from behind the city skyline
The mirror image in the soft waves below
Feeling the the sun's warmth brush against the back of my neck
During a beautiful winter day
Why is it that the common expression is
“Butterflies in the stomach”
When referring to a feeling of apprehension
Of both good and bad varieties?
"Just be yourself."
I've heard that line a thousand times
Which self? The one that gets me admiration and respect,
or the one who swings between lows and elation,
A stab in the heart from the blade you called love
You said sweet things to my face then turn around and switched up
Whats real & whats fake? In this time I couldn't tell
You look at meAnd you see tears fallingYou think—What could be so sad that she cries?But if only you knewThat joy brings these tears to me.Laughter with friendsAnd people I love
Others talk, whisper, and even push me for the way I look, act, and dress
I just shake it off and act like my life isn't a big mess
My mom and dad fight almost every night
I'm looking up at the sky, thinking about our memories--
And all the good times, and the bad; I remember...
When I really blew it hard to the core, beyond recover
After that I never saw you ever again.
You think you know me
But are you inside me?
Do you see the world from my point of view?
Think my thoughts, feel my feelings?
Sometimes I'm always down,
Sometimes I'm always looking at the ground,
Sometimes I cash in on my bad luck,
Sometimes it's me lightning has struck,
Sometimes I always keep my head high,
Click, switch – laughter
silly girl, full of joy
Click, switch – anger
holes in walls, bruised fingers
Click, switch – pain
curled in a ball, bleeding at the wrist
Click, switch – sadness
First he wants you, then he doesn't want youHe says to let it flowBoy make up your mindIt's either a yes or a noOriginally I'm your girl then you say I'm just a friend
MY God
MY GOD,
How long did it take to create such a beautiful Child?
I know it took a beautiful while,
You wonder if it's all in your head.
Why can't you run awayor cry for help?
Once again, you are driven against the cold cement.
You become paralyzed.
Unable to move
As time goes on, the more I wonder how much it was true
Did you love me as much as I still love you?
Does your heart ache while you lie awake in the dark
Thinking of my hand wrapped gently around your arm
COLOR MEWith the dichotomies ofChink and AsianPerhaps then my tulip-shaped eyes may twitch openWATCH MEReach for a boundless futureEFfervescent and unhinged
Girl let me tell you that i've been on the road though
Singing songs of how I miss you
A boat load
I am like the sea, beautiful and wild on the surface,
deep and mysterious underneath.
Unknown by many, misunderstood by all.
Have you ever been
So angry
That you broke a wall
Broke a heart
Have you ever been
So depressed
That you only feel
The blade against you skin
Have you ever been
I have a lot of things to say. I view these things as important. Are they important to others? No, they are not. The things I want to say do not interest people, so I attempt to believe these things are not important.
I need to prepare.
I have to get ready.
I have got to get the part perfect.
I am here.
I am alone.
I am nervous
I should not be nervous.
I have to calm down.
I know I can do this.
Music is my life
Music makes me feel good
Music takes away my pain
Music helps me redirect my emotions
Music helps me through the hard times
Music is there when i have no one
Music is my life
Fly away, fly away my pretty little bird
Why won't you fly away?
Your wings are torn, batered, and broke, why won't you fly away, way
Why wont you fly away?
It's easier to be alone where you know no one can touch you.
It's easier to be alone because you don't have to care for anyone.
It's easier to be alone because you know you can't hurt anyone.
I am not going to give a sob story
I am not going to give a glory story
I do not have any horror stories to give
But if you look into my heart you will see the only story I live
You will see who I am
The pounding in my head won’t go away
The rush, the high, flying
None of it will go away
The rush, the rush, it’s supposed to end
The night over, the day breaking
--but fuck that why end it early?
Abandoned, left alone
Sullen, with a heavy heart
Smiling in the play of life is just a part
I could wipe off 90% of that so called beauty with a kleenex...
I see that your outershell is gorgeous
Underneath that.. It's pure ugly
No.
Not your face.
Your insides. Your guts. your soul.
Look at it fall
Don't even bother
To catch it
Tear, Tear, Tear
Watch it roll
Don't even bother
To stop it
Tear, tear, tear
Most of all
You don't care
To even notice
I think a whole lot sometimes,
Yet sometimes I think of her and then I try to stop.
The more I think of her the more I vision us,
I say vsion because a thought with no action is merely a dream.
I like you
but I don’t want you in my head.
Im not used to being controlled,
Im used to being in control.
I always feel like crumbling
As gravity pulls me down,
But when the music kills the sounds
I find myself lost in a sea of harmony
All the sorrow and anger I've felt
Gets lost stolen and secure
Long sleeves in mid summer.
Always trying to trick the others.
Covering up what The Cat has done,
man many people are dumb.
Walkin around in a daze.
Putting fake smiles on your face,
The guard is up
No one can get in
No one can see what I feel
I don't want to see your face with pity clear upon it.
I built this guard many years ago
When you shattered my heart
I’m dying on the inside
And no one knows. My heart
Beating a useless tone,
My flaws laid out in front of me,
As if all things will end eventually.
Why do I bother?
No one can hear,
I hide behind the Curtain
but People can still see
if they look hard
They will find me
I hide behind the Curtain
When I want them to know
What is bothering me
What hurts now
Smile, cry, hide
Me, myself and I
2/4 cup of plastered smiles, oh I pull them off how
1/2 cup of tears without the pain, I don't want to shed a tear again
Do I know you?
The words you pronounce
are so ugly and dirty,
But you say they fit me just
perfectly.
Do I know you?
No, I do not
but here I am lying on the floor
There is a lot of flaw
In an adolescent girl
Leading a women’s ministry,
Judged by the world.
There is a lot of sadness
In an adolescent girl
Motivating others,
Smiling at the world.
There's regret and remorse then trying to forget and move foward, but all of this time I'm thinking...
Come One! Come All!
There's much to see.
Leave behind your reality!
See the acts! See the shows! Experience emotions nobody else knows.
Come in! Sit down! Get your mind ready.
I’d change the homophobia, the fear and the hate,
The suppression of expression we face each day,
The way they look at us as though we’re not quite right,
If I told you that I'm emotionally sensitive, you wouldn't have a clue as to what I'm talking about.
I wouldn't have had a clue as to what I'm talking about until June of 2014,
Feel the vibe flowing through my veins
Opening a never-ending wealth of spiritual domain
So mentally taxing I can't help but wonder what will remain
Anger is…
Danger
It’s a cruel thing that hurts
Rather than help
It causes wars
It causes sores
It causes people to act out violently
When they should be acting passively
Curse words, punches,
With your eyes like the sea
and your heart crashing waves
you blend flawlessly
with every perfection surrounding
i would do anything to keep from losing you,
out there among the salty breeze.
How many times have I fallen,
Only to fall apon the floor.
How many times have I given my heart,
Only to have someone slam the door.
My heart now covered in scars,
Has grown tougher then is has ever been.
Close your eyes,
Close your eyes and breathe.
This can’t be me,
This isn’t happening to me.
But it is.
And you can’t help it,
But what did you do?
Why you?
The weight is over bearing,
AND ALL I WANT TO KNOW IS ARE YOU OKAY OR DO YOU MERELY SAY YOU ARE TO AVOID WEIRD GLANCES AND LONG AWKWARD TALKS ABOUT FEELINGS THAT DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING EXCEPT ENSURE THAT YOU WILL NEVER TALK TO ANYONE AGAIN ARE YOU OKAY OR DO Y
THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME HOW TO KISS MY OWN WOUNDS EVEN THOUGH I STILL SOMETIMES PRETEND THAT IT IS YOUR LIPS AND YOUR HANDS AND YOUR WORDS AND YOUR LOVE BUT I AM THE ONLY PERSON THAT IS WILLING TO MAKE ME BETTER RIGHT NOW AND I A
I NEED RESCUING OVER AND OVER AND AGAIN AND AGAIN BECAUSE I CANNOT REACH ALL THE WAY DOWN MY THROAT AND PULL THE WEED OUT ROOTS AND ALL SO IT GROWS BACK AN INFINITE NUMBER OF TIMES UNTIL I AM CRYING AND IT IS SLOWLY KILLING ME AND
WHAT I DONT UNDERSTAND IS WHY IS LOVE SO READILY AVAILABLE TO SOME PEOPLE BUT SO HARD FOR ME TO ACCESS WHY IS IT SO EASY FOR ME TO LOVE OTHER PEOPLE BUT HARDER THAN HELL TO LOVE MYSELF AND WHY IS IT OKAY THAT I CAN SO COMPLETELY IN
PINK LIPS AND A TONGUE MADE OF FIRE AND CRACKED TEETH LIKE AN OLD PORCELAIN SINK THIS IS WHY I CAN'T GET YOU OUT OF MY HEAD THIS IS WHY I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOUR BLOOD FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH I TRY TO CUT IT OU
BECAUSE YOU AND I ARE LIKE ASHES FALLING INTO THE BATHTUB WATER OFF OF THE END OF YOUR LIT CIGARETTE AND I AM SO SAFE AND YOU ARE SO DANGEROUS AND WHEN WE ARE TOGETHER YOU TRIP LIGHTLY FROM THE FLAMES AROUND YOU AND FIZZLE OUT IN M
I am hardwired to feel every emotion so deeply that I have to rip holes in my skin to let them out and I am not human enough to be considered alive on the other side of it all
IT IS ELEVEN FIFTY EIGHT ON A WEDNESDAY NIGHT AND I AM LYING IN A HOTEL BED WITH YOUR NAME ON MY WRIST STARING AT THE CEILING AND IM TRYING SO FUCKING HARD NOT TO CRY BUT HOLY SHIT I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU LIKE HELL AND I D
The pattern of the clocks...each tick cuts through empty thoughts.Blood pumps through little veinsThat lay neatly upon solid bone.Hours at a time
I'm not as bad as you think
I'm not a problem child
I sit in my room
And I use the internet
I'm not out partying
I'm not out drinking
I'm not shooting up
Or popping pills
Headphones always covering my ears
Blocking out the sound
No one can see my feelings
I am a stone
No one knows what was taken from me
No one knows my reactions
I do everything calmly
Look in through the window
and what do I see?
The whole world that will stare back at me...
The moment I walk into the street
I debait on the way I should carry my feet.
I'm always getting hurt
No matter who it is;
My brother,
My sister,
My father,
My mother....
I don't know what I did to deserve this
Always getting the worst of someone's anger
Up and down and up, up, upRunning around until I'm shut upScreaming and fightingThere is no endUntil I'm shipped awayThat's when the anger blew away
We have forgotten the most profound voices,
The roots to our own humanity.
Anger,
The lava vein of an erupting volcano,
Pulsates because the vain whistles in the same high pitch.
A double edged sword
one side love
one side hate
living through a twisted fate
one side life
one side death
struggling for one last breath
one side forgives
Put on a Mask,
No one will notice,
It’s not like they would care
Put on a Mask,
It is okay to hide,
Your feelings you mustn’t share
Put on a Mask,
Everything is fine,
Many poet's inspiration is sadness.
Many poets' inspiration is depression.
Many poets' inspiration is loneliness.
This poet's inspiration is You.
You came to me out of the blue.
It is wet and rancorous
and my new leather shoes would feel the worst of it long before I got to class.
I stopped, before exiting, to appreciate the mighty storm – and open my umbrella.
Day in and day out
Your name pops into my head
Memories of your touch, smell, and taste
Haunt me at night
Wishing and hoping you'd come back
That you's realize that I still love you
A tender gaze
and I catch my breath.
You don't know what you mean
to me.
All these feelings I try to hide
behind a veil of normalcy -
the pain and anger
love and need
Don't let go of me
I'm like a canoe in this raging sea
I'm trying to make it in this world
But I just keep on getting hurled
No one seems to understand
They make me feel so bland
Happy, sad, angry, hopeful…
These are emotions behind my mask.
Happy, patient, brave, smart, athletic…
These are the characteristics visible to the public on my special mask
You’re looking out your window tonight
So many things running through your mind
You feel like you’ve lost who you are
You want to find your way back to the start
But you can’t, oh no, you can’t
Am I not good enough for them?Is who I am not who they want me to be?They want me to be this plastic, perfect figure that I don’t seeAnd they need to know, they need to know
I’ve seen apart of me I didn’t recognize.
Through my eyes I saw how my reactions to your actions, made me low, low point on the scale,
I’ve inhale, what you’ve exhaled to me.
sitting in the broken land. surrounded by dead memories of lost friends.
family and friends are all dead,
the ties to my history have no thread.
i lay motionless,
cry towards beauty and sonnetts to the grave,
In this torturous classroom
I sit in row 5, seat 3
and to my right in row 4, seat 3
sits the most beautiful boy I've ever laid eyes on.
Every time we make eye contact
I feel a rush of warmth
This body is not an apology
This blacked out mirror
This blacked out skin
This skin like shadows
This shadow makes noise
This "bitch don't make noise"
I ask myself why I'm angry
why the hate
why the sudden anger
all these years
why do I bring it out
my bad side
the bad side lurking in the shadows in my head
telling me to do you wrong
Life, too often, is rushed.
No time to waste, no time to relax
No time to even say good morning
" Tick-Tock " says the clock!
Everyone's gotta be somewhere
Rush, rush, rush
Rush to school
The fact that evil is stronger than good
is evil itself.
Why must good be weaker than evil?
Why must death me faster than creating life?
Why must bullies be stronger than nerds?
It seems these days the only way to be considered for anything is to be a battered, broken, shell of a person. The scholarships, the colleges, they want survivors They want the best storyBut what about me?
I move through the halls with barely a glance.
People won't talk to me, won't give me a chance.
They hardly notice if my appearance I enhance.
I am not a ghost.
I spend most of the day inside my head,
In 2023, a ship called Mars One
will depart from the surface of the earth
and never return.
It will fly forty million miles to a place
where human kind has never set its heavy foot.
Have you ever felt like you're in the shadows waiting for your time to shine?
Have you ever felt like you're tumbling over, caught on the borderline?
All my life I told you tales about monsters
The beasts underneath my bed
Always telling you they wanted to kidnap me
When in fact they wanted me dead
Open and close, open and close
The same action goes on
I breathe out cool air
Your dearest desires
And appalling items
Stored in this wonderful box
Curiousity and Happiness,
She called upon me to aid her,
to stop the crying. Her crying
is a marathon runner who can never reach the finish line.
I’m no savior, but I’m the only one
left to care.
My skin burns where your hands once were like acid on light flesh.
I've taken four showers today to try to wash away the pain but your handprint stays on my porcelain skin.
When the skyline comes into view,
I feel it.
When I crane my neck and squint
my eyes to see the very top of the Sears turned Willis Tower,
I feel it.
That sense
of longing and
that sense
Ducks are ducks
trees are trees
what is not here
is bothering me
Quacks are quacks
seas are nothing but simple seas
this poem is really bothering me
what is this really?
Prisoner of Words Unsaid
For so long
For so long I've been a prisoner
A life sentenced prisoner for a crime they committed for me
Like Alicia Keys "I'm a prisoner of words unsaid
I never truly understood the stories
Where the girl would spend weeks pining after some guy
"Way out of her league"
Who didn't even know her name
After she saw him with another woman
I think about how we used to be
Then I get stuck in my misery
I still remember the way you used to look at me
& how all those feelings came free
But now things will never be the same
People say rain is the crying of God, but I say different
I say the rain is the crying of humanity,
The emotions that are stored, but never released,
I wrote you a book of what's in store.
on how I have always had open my front door.
For you to walk in and stay with me.
So we all could be one big, happy family.
But you walked out and left us alone.
I never thought I'd hate something as much as you
You take away the good people from the world
You make them want you more then anything or anyone else
Those with hard enough lives you make worse
Why does it hurt so much when you were never truly mine?
Why did it feel like she stole you from me when you were never mine?
Why does it feel like she crushed my heart and threw when you were never mine?
Slam! Going at this because Im going HAM.
By the time im through you'll know exactly who I am.
I resonate through all the oceans and all the lands.
Being attacked by feelings that many will never understand.
This time last year I would have hesitatedBut a lot has changed in the last twelve monthsAnd now I am becoming the person I once hated.
What could I do?
What would I say?
I cannot begin to imagine the pain I'll feel once I realize you are permanently gone
You'll be like a distant memory of what could have been, what was
I rather die...
than force myself to sleep.
Thinking that everything should be eiditic;
Leave me,
I'm hurt can't you see?
From the harsh words you've said to me,
I'm fed up with the tears,
Rain Rain Never Go Away
You are the only one that understands my pain
When everyone shuts me out
You open your clouds up and cry with me
You can find me
where the
dust sparkles
in the window
from the sun's rays
You can find me-
there
I'll be hiding
beside the curtain
blending into the wall
I am the glass vase you forgot to fill
With flowers last week. So let me be cold,
Let me be beautiful. Let me be clear.
I am the drawer you left open in your
Rush out the door. So let me be misplaced,
Here I sit
Head in my hands
Heart on the table.
It's withered and worn
with every blow it gets worse
I watch it grow and grow
like a hot air balloon
it fills until finally,
Why am I nor happy?
I have such a big porch for me alone.
I have the life that no one else owns.
I have gold that no other holds.
Why am I not happy?
I have all I want,
But something stands.
What is hope
Is it the illogical sense of knowing everything will be alright?
Is it stupid
Is it smart
What is hope
Is it wishing something that you want comes true?
Is it selfish
If I left today, who would miss me?
If I packed my bags today and left, who would cry?
If I would to walk until one day I eventually died, who would wish they said goodbye?
Just when I start to get used to things the way they are, they become unraveled.
Life around me is unraveling, my mind is unraveling.
I cannot seem to find a foot hold in this fragile ground.
You broke my heart when you sai goodbye
You made me cutt and want to die
You told me you love me and that you cared
You even got me a cute teady bear
I gave you my heart
And you tore it apart
i look at this blank page; or
I I try to see bend the words
Flowing from my own pen
I look and I won't see the the truth in the words I write-
I will look and I won't see that my mind is in a fight
AS darkness takes over
my plea is to be free,
but all it does
is take over me.
I hope for a candle,
but no, it's to bright.
so instead,
I search for the right.
You are in my darkness,
No one seems to understand
my poetry
the way I write
my poetry
is not for the rhymes
my poetry
ia written to make me feel good
my poetry
is where I vent all of my feelings
my poetry
Placid water,
My reflection stands still.
Though my thoughts in my head,
And the emotions that i feel,
Run rampant throughtout me,
Beckoning tears to my eyes.
But no longer will i suffer,
Everyday I wonder why
Everyday I look into your eyes
I see what I don't want to be
Everyday I picture a dream in my head
One so profound I feel as if it can never be crushed
It has taken mea very long timeto come to this point,but I’m realizing nowafter eighteen yearsof my lifethat it is okay to feel.I spent so many monthsof my life
Sadness breeds stinging, numbing Pain, which then breeds twin daughters, both alike in strength, but different in nature.
I am living but I'm not alive
Everynight I let myslef cry
I go to sleep hoping to never wake up
I am living but I'm not alive
I've gone through things and I wish I died
I wake up but I'm still dead
I don't know what happened,
For everything just went black
Feels like the world just stopped
Now everything's just turning bad
I Cant dry the tears falling from my eyes
With my heart beating so fast
Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. I repeat in a unison of three, specifically. I'm tired of this life and all that it has become. I'm so numb and haunted by this world. Haunted by the life I'm currently living.
Washing my eyes
With rain drops of Summertime
He’s kissing my throat
As I choke on this lullaby
Singing it softly
I whisper the words
Lungs filled with sweet flowers
For I once counted Daffodils in my sleep,
So delicate and unique.
But no more can I sleep,
For the devil has a hold of me oh so deep.
For I once counted Daffodils in my sleep,
So delicate and unique.
Living a dead life.
Full of hatred towards love.
Depressed happiness.
I take forced breaths.
Sometimes I wish I could gather up the energy to stop them.
I complain about the life I have,
I've forgotten what it feels like, the love another.
No, I don't mean like a sister or brothers.
I mean that one person, the one who knows your fears.
The one who pats your back, the one who wipes your tears!
Hello
Umm......
I apologize if I'm a bother
I usually don't do this because I'm....
Well I get nervous
But I just wanted to tell you that you are gorgeous
He's not around.
I feel empy.
Its cold without him.
He kept me warm. Warmer than jackets and hats and scarves and sweaters...
Its cold without him.
I feel empty.
Empty. More like a car with no gas...
beat beat beating
pound pound pounding
Is it a heart?
A fist?
A drum?
A speaker?
Is it all not the same?
Isn't everything that makes this sound of purpose worth the same?
"Why must love feel like a heart attack"?Some may sayCausing our hearts to sputter one final beatThump, thump, shhDifferent types of love lause different types
This life comes with so many demands..but it seem as if you lost your understanding of being a man..but how can you be that which you have never had in your life..a man that can show or tell you the difference betwe
I walk through school and I look at the sea of faces. Except, I do not see faces, I see walls. The walls that people hide behind to seem strong and in control.
I had met with an angel.
Here's what he had said:
Love me forever, and it costs but one small thing
a life, fleeting
a soul-less little thing
your soul I ask to bring.
I had met with that angel
Every day,
I fake a smile,
I look at the world through dead eyes,
I slice up my wrists,
And I bruise my thighs,
They beckon to me,
The colorful pills,
The nylon rope,
The loaded gun,
Sunlight brings about fake smiles, and energy. Moonlight brings out the true self. The one who cries themself to sleep. While the sun shines we all play the role, as an actor on a stage.
happiness
is a scary thing.
it can be taken
so easily,
ripped away
from your grasp,
snatched away
from your clutch
when you’re already
so comfortable,
so accustomed.
I am holding a bladeUp to my wrist In the knife all I see is lies upon liesBut then I see youAnd your little blue eyesYou say put the kinfe down AuntieOr I will crySo I put down the kinfe
There are five minutesThere are peopleThere are scars(there, on your)
There you areNeither here nor there, thoughts everywhere
There is not enough
Jimena hates living in this world
She comes to a point where sanity and insanity become whole
She struggles to understand the meaning of her existence
What are words?
but a mere creation of humans.
No words can describe how I feel,
when I'm without you.
No words can explain the feeling I get,
when I see you.
Death is not a beautiful thing.
It's terrifying.
Just the though of it makes my heart quicken.
What lies beyond, deep into the abyss.
Watching your back
Disappear into the setting sun
Why did you leave?
I try to follow
Only to be left behind
A lonely shadow
The worst thing you want to be is a failure in life
To put down the people in your life and here them whisper "lowlife"
To constantly show no improvement over and over
To be confronted and insulted
Why is it that when you lose a love your heart breaks,
if love is just a chemical addiction produced by our brains?
Why does it feel like your thoracic cavity is hollow,
A stranger...
A feeling...
True or not
Days, Months, Years...
Friends, Best friends, lovers...
One day, eyes are on her
Slowly Slowly dissapear infront...
of my eyes...
It's not healthy, I know
Like I'm just putting on a show
Writing rhymes to forget
That I am very sick.
Maybe something's not right
This worsening plight
My life is unusual I hate myself completely, if my life were a story I would just delete me
I'm dramatic nd mad Im never fully happy, my only emotion being anger, nd attitude nothing less than crappy
Trust and be assured
until your whole life reduces to nothing but
waking up morning after morning trembling with fear.
Unknowingly passing it from man to man
until every face is begging with unheard screams
The music is blaring
my heart is despairng
Tears roll down my face
my heart is starting to race
Sitting in a dark room
just waiting for my doom
Can't stand them poking at me
Some will never know the joy but only the end
they'll never see the light when the light has dimmed
With a beauty like hers, no one can deny,
Her heart full of gold, and her eyes filled with such integrity,
With her locks of bronze blonde waves and the skin looks like a model.
Why do we cry, let things happen as they will
Why are we so scared, as if dying at every chosen trail
Try going ahead, leave it at that
Try flying with the clouds so you don't look back
Abandoned, incomplete works of emotion
litter these several spiral-bound books.
Unfinished letters to people
I hate and love with all my heart.
The words lie on the paper,
Night after night,
into the miserable hours
of another weary morning,
I waste my time
lying restlessly
in a bed too familiar.
Tiny branches of red
You're warned - there are signs.
It starts to get dark outside,
and on your foggy window is
the soft pattering of rain. You
know what's coming,
and you're hiding in your room,
This morning, my three year old sister ran through the halls in her princess pajamas and a cape wrapped around her head, while I nearly cried into my already soggy cereal.
One morning I glued my eyes onto the car dashboard and stared
At the shadows passing across.
It was early so the sun was rising slowly,
But the shadows moved quickly like liquids.
From dawn 'till dusk I am enclosed,
In my own world yet so exposed.
Passing by, a mere obsever,
Using distance as my life's preserver.
Close enough to touch, too far away to see,
Troubled spirits speak the most...
Because so much pain has the words flowing like the tears we cry.
as it swayed in soft circles dangling upside down from my ceiling fan, i watched through tears as the carnations wilted white petals penetrated the darkness of my room.
I’m a human being
I make mistakes; make risks to take
I determine my life, prevent results, regulate my fate
You can give advice
But it’s my life. Don’t theorize a comprise
Flitting through the trees
She runs
Like the quicksilver moon
High in the clear night sky
He passes through the dark trees
Striding onward with some mysterious purpose
She’s
Tired of living life in the shadow of a doubt
Speaking but not being heard
Feeling as though she’ll never be good enough
This girl isn’t me
But me all the same
Passionate heart thiefBy anonymously me Call me a thief of passionate hearts...Passionate arts collide as I seek afterTrue love now a lost art...Never foretold to last forever but
Sometimes I feel like I am a lie.
Not my life, but myself.
Looking into the mirror I see…
Past the small-lipped grin
Past the curious eyes
What
Am
I?
Thoughts are
Drowning me
In my head
A pool
Of lies
And conspiracies
Not stopping
Until I have sunk
But I know how to swim
Memories are
Burning me
No more hurt,
No more pain,
No more broken hearts,
And no more devastating surprises.
There is a cure for cancer.
How softly the music plays
A minstrel’s tune sways
I can only just feel it
Brushing along my finger tips
Tingling down my spine
The world slowly becoming mute
Yet feeling so alive
Whispering smiles indent my thoughts as I walk through the halls.
Overthinking what's past and what's present has been known to ruin me.
Every move I make causes my conscience to stutter.
It’s still so hard
To just wake up
Each and every day.
It’s hard to know
A simple life can
Make me feel this way.
I’ll put on a face
I’ll make believe.
Somehow I’ll be okay,
We survive in a world of consumption
No compassion for the surrounding
How can we agree that we even live
Mental illness is never taken as seriously as it is.
People critize and ridicule us with depression, saying
"Wow, you're such an attention-seeker."
If only they knew.
Now she is wondering
Looking for mom and dad
Scream Little Girl Scream
He is scared
Trying to escape the terrible wind
Run Little Boy Run
Her kid was lost
I cause pain
I cause distress
Take me out.
I cause heartache
And I cause stress
Take me out.
I fell asleep
And hoped I never would wake up
Take me out.
i don't remember when it happened.
We were walking, and talking, and suddenly without cause of attention we were holding hands.
I don't remember when it happened.
WHAT WOULD I CHANGE HUH I ASK MYSELF THIS QUESTION LOOK IN THE MIRROR TO MY REFLECTION. WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE GIRL? CLOSE MY EYES AND BY MY SURPRISE I GET A FLASH OF THE WORLD.
Lonesome softly pounds
Whispers sweet sounds
Waits until day it ends
Paces and it depends
It asks for me to wait
Afraid I decide my fate
And I never make a change
Alone we never do gain
She awoke to hear him bid good morning
She slept to hear him say good night
But as the tide rolled in and washed him away
She faded into the darkness today
And time it screeched and cried
I'm in a smoky bubble
and it take all of the shine
out of life and makes everything turn into rubble
It just keeps you blind
to everything else except the bad
It distorts reality making you feel confined
I don't want to seem selfish
I know there's bad all around
But this holllow sound of emptiness
Drowns out all of the cries for help
I don't want to seem selfish
I can’t stop thinking about you. When I’m sober or when I’m drunk as all f*ck, you’re the only person that comes to mind. And I ask myself why?
Devilish deliverer of darkness
Eerie establisher of ease
Faithless father of fear
People say mean things
they say I'm not good enough
say I'm ugly or dumb
sometimes they are right
sometimes I am dumb enough to listen to the hateful words
“Depression”
I’m tired of wearing the painted grin
That mocks me and all of my sin.
The pain of my soul and my mind
You say that I've changed
but you're the reason i'm so cold.
Get out of my head,
the fights quickly get old.
You've made me so heartless
something I knew nothing of.
Once you broke my heart,
Isolate yourself
then ask why you're so lonely.
Tell you how I think,
now I feel like a phony.
These poisons were shared
over and over before,
between you and I,
this darkness we tore.
Oh I'm lost in the world
Lost in a world called life
Running around trapped
Trapped in the world
Oh I'm lost in the world
Trapped in the mind
Trapped in time
Craving Clarity..
you caught me like a
dream, tangled in the beaded
threads of your feathered
web, your dreamcatcher
holding my spirit in a
cage of promises.
you kept me like a
this is the sound of
your razor-blade betrayal
shredding through my trust.
there is nothing like
the bittersweet sting of your
honey-coated lies.
this is how it felt
I follow as a poison-tipped arrow would,
tracking the heels of Achilles,
honing in on a weakness you were
powerless to prevent
my path is one of
greed,
hunger,
thoughtless self
It's the bubbly feelings.
It's the cuddling in front of the fire.
It's total understanding.
It's the emotion that will never retire.
It's pain and desperation.
It's completely natural to me,
Like I've done it all my life,
It helps to take away the pain,
The way they treat me is wrong,
It helps to take it all away,
It helps relieve the stress,
Grab my heart and squeeze.
Make me suffer, make me bleed.
I can barely breathe.
Dry heave, all these happy memories.
I can’t stand to watch you leave,
Remembering lost moments of ecstasy.
Screw the people who break us down so much, that we become senseless and open
If that’s an opportunity, damn, love, just consider me your token
Let’s strip the truth of all its beauty
I'm in a state of suffering
My soul condemned to this constant pain
Expiating my sins
The pain is becoming increasingly unbearable
I just want to be done
The quiet darkness that
slipped in through the tiniest
slits and sat
growing and festering,
Has all but swallowed me whole.
Thick black curtains sequestering
the light with in my soul.
In this limited mother tongueby which I communicate to you,all I can call it is love.Cannot express through the utteranceof a single word, if a father holdsa daughter in his arms for the first
Such a beautiful soul
Flying free
Soaring over mountains
Limitless as can be
No one can bring her down
Such a beautiful soul
Flying free
Soaring over mountains
Limitless as can be
No one can bring her down
Lost inside her world of pain
Where everything is dead
The darkness starts to trap her
Although it's only in her head.
She tries to run and free herself
But cannot seem to breathe
A night to remember, a spin and a glideas we make our way through the aisle.I was too young when you left my side.
If an Author is a job than believe me my life will be changed.
I sit and pondered on what is it I want to do for the rest of my life.
It came clear to me that it would be to write.
I look and see greatness and admiration.
I always have to look pass my procrastination.
I would like to change that so I could get more things done.
My soul mate
One day
I find myself fly away
Leave this world
Above the stars
Back again
Never letting go of me
Shifting, thinking, bending
You twist my body
Whirling me around
Glamorous
I dream in black and whiteI bleed the color of your eyes
All I can see is your lipsGently glazing over mine
As the sun setI saw my rose petals in the flame
you are the stars i gaze at every single night
you are the sun i wake to with its rays of golden light
you frolic in my orangejuice and snuggle in my bread
you've nestled in my heart and you've rooted in my head
If I could change the world, I wouldn't change it.
For we already have the capability to rearrange it.
We are a feeling species.
Full of love and of hate.
Yet we cannot appretiate that fact.
Hollow Ghost of Red Heart
Ominous with frantic rage
Yet vindictive under the Vail
Luminous as starlight nights
kiss me softly
with your spirit when you sleep
let's slip into warm bliss and
drift away
caress my hips, hold my hand
Breathing Just Fine
Held under water
Gazing upon him
We fight for a way out
The sea blue runs black
If I told you I was suicidal would you believe me?
Maybe I don't cut, and maybe I don't attempt,
but I sure do think about it every waking moment.
She stares out the window
Content as can be
In her long raven locks
A flower is propped.
Paint Stains her olive hands
She seems to care less
As they lay on her dress
Gripping the razor
She admires its silver tone
Exposing her wrist
She examines her canvas
She glides the razor
Ever so gently
Feeling the painful hole in her chest go away
She always looked for a silver lining
But never thought it would be a silver razor
One side dull
The other thin, sharp
Admiring it reflecting the single light in her room
Gripping it in one hand
You were taken too soon my friend
And I sit here and wonder
Why your life had to end
Like the rolling of thunder
My one regret is not responding
In the month of November
I have anger
that boils within me.
it erupts like a valcano.
Therapy can help you.
I'm always sad.
Moving hurts me.
All I do is cry.
My tears could fill a river.
He held her hand in his
bone achingly tight;
his jaw clenched with bravado
while his legs shook in fright.
She was cold to the touch,
itsy bitsy chills;
eyes bright with life,
drifting through time
with no one to be
why cant anybody see me?
i do my best
for all to see
but no one
notices me
im in all the plays
and all the pictures
The budding feeling in the fleshThe feeling of what's in the chestThe feeling you cannot beholdThe feeling that lingers and unfoldsThe transient feeling of the air
Days,
Weeks,
Months,
They pass.
And I wait.
I wait on you.
I wait on a FaceTime,
A call,
Some word.
But you don't call.
You don't FaceTime,
You send no word.
Surrounded
need space
To breath
Suffocating
looking
for help
and no one,
no one
notices
Do I matter?
Guess not
Why not?
Falls
Tars fall
Homeless individuals sleep with dreams of what they used to be
Now they have moved on leaving the new generation drowning sea to sea
No education, no temptation, to get a dream fulfilled
The Dark that cones, the dark that rises. The darkness that is the light, in all my wrong doing. If you protect me from myself, your protecting me from THE DARKNESS.
¡Qué refrescante acaba de ser dicha bebida!
Una figura cilíndrica que posee unos colores tan vivos
que es extremadamente llamativa a cualquiera que pasa enseguida de ella.
What would I change?
What would I do to fix this broken earth?
What would I do to recreate the humanity that has been lost through the years?
What can one person do?
We are but paper
Floating through the winds of life
Our skin crinkling and tearing
There are words which are forgotten
Carved and sunken in our flesh
Speaking of our truths
I need faith,
for i am faithless,
the demons in my dreams.
the darkness in my heart,
there is no light in my heart.
what i don't understand,
Love you "say" but its not true.
Its just another word for "forget you"
Told me you love me, told me you cared. But why arent you standing here?
You made it up didnt you? just to fill in the blank.
what is worse
feeling sad, lonely, worthless, ugly, horrible...
or feeling nothing at all?
i told myself i was recovering
this is recovery
but a little part of me is saying that this is not recovery
A world dominated by people who have erased vulnerabilityFrom their thoughts, seems to be falling apart.We train ourselves to be stern and collectedTo not show emotions, because emotions are our downfall.
I’m that girl
That’s a fly on the wall.
That girl that tries to do good things
But doesn’t get noticed at all.
I’m that girl that no one sees when her friends are near
It is strange that I had never touched a cigarette until I had remembered how the taste would linger in my mouth after I had kissed you?
Look.
Breath catching
Ducking behind corners
Hiding from something
Too much to admit
There.
Its not your fault, not a bit
But I'm so scared
I don't sound like myself
I try to find myself, but I've been lost for forever. It's like I'm going in a circle so you'd think I'd know better. I'm somewhat lost in a trance, I can't find myself. Took 34 pills disregarding my own health.
The strength of those
who know of how
you cannot harm
anyone for long.
How can such a
short trial, be of
much harm? When they
will know how you
can never last
for long. Life is
Eyes swelled up with tears,
As i said goodbye to YESTERDAY.
The promise of romance drowning in the ocean of my heart.
The unbroken man says, “Emotions are easy to tell.”
To which, the shattered girl replies, “You just buy what they sell.”
Says the man, “Happiness is easily shown with a smile.”
It’s one of those nights when all the memories take physical form.
When monsters swallow kindness to retch sadness and nostalgia.
Fear hinders our progress towards better times
where we need not be alone,
it suffocates lights and welcomes darkness
into our mind's own home.
Fear grips the souls of men
in a way no human can,
Love is rich
sometimes its a bitch
or a witch
that cast a spell that makes you twitch
untill you cant take another inch , away
from the girl that first said hey
that would later on say
time to sit downand frown a littlecry for a secondwhen sadness is beckonedtime to lay stilland fill with griefmelancholy is realwhen it's all you feeltime to breath now
How does one say this...That you are wonderful and
In wonder I fall (senselessly)
I cannot breathfor the pain.The energy I spendpretending I'm all rightis far more that ever before.I just want to sleep.To sleep and never wake.Let me die.Let me embrace
We all deal with monsters,
Monsters in our heads,
Monsters in our bodies.
Depression, Scizophrenia,
Rymitoid, CRPS.
The monsters kill us,
Inside and out,
To the point of no return,
Broken pieces
Shattered heart
My life just seems to fall apart
But there's nothing that I can do
Hiding what's inside
showing what's not really there and
Leaving behind my feelings for you
Depression
Intercepting the world's blessings
Depression
Deception at its highest form
Depression
Dont think for a minute "my life is warm" cause its colder than an artic storm sometimes I wish I wasnt born
Tossed aside one too many times,
Unpredictable to say the least;
Breaking past barriers and lines,
Like unleashing a ravening beast.
Angry and ever intensifying,
Making cautious all who are near;
How is it that two lovers once so true,
Could say that they have had their feelings changed?
Never will it be so with me for you,
Never shall my love be swayed or estranged.
THE HARDEST TIME OF MY LIFE
Everybody try to understand
But I didn’t want you to
I don’t think you can comprehend
I'm brave, determined, focused.
However, sometimes I wonder,
Can I do it all?
Honestly, I can't.
Can I go through life,
Like a stone statue,
Without any help
Honestly, I can't.
What happens when God himself falls from heaven?
When the heavenly grace is stripped?
I don’t understand why it is so hard
For you to suck up your ego for 2 seconds
and let your guard down
You see I need some answers
because the pain is back.
It isn’t pulsating and waking me at 2:43 am
The Mirror never lies,
You see what they see,
The Scars,
The Burns,
The Lies,
They haunt you,
Bringing back old memories of love,
I stare at the mirror.
Ugly!
I blink back tears.
Fat!
I know it's not true.
Don't I?
I look fine.
Hidden under clothes!
People think I'm cute.
They pity you!
Snow to sleet, and sleet to snow
Trudging softly to and fro.
Waiting for the golden glare
Always hidden, never there.
Sweetly “singing in the rain”
Quite a lie, to my disdain.
When looking into your eyes
The brown flecked storm of hurt and goodbyes
Bores into you while a cement truck paves a new road for you to venture on by
When looking in your eyes
The pupil goes wide
When you want to cry
You don't know where to go
Don't know where to hide
Knowing those moments leading up
Those words or lack there of
Words which stay in the head
Which way to look
The mundane becomes extraordinary
early in the dragging day
as we meet before going our separate ways.
Your gaze pours into me,
warmth floods my heart;
I drown in blue irises
under waves of intensity.
Acceptance is what I choose to need.
To get away from my misery.
I trust those who hurt and love those who use me.
Acceptance is what I choose to need.
To get away from my misery.
I trust those who hurt and love those who use me.
Like a breath of cold air, i am lonely with fear,this pain i feel ,i just can't bear,it is painful enough to kill,ones fragile heart,Like a breath of cold air,to repair the heart,that was taken apart,by one careless words,by me taking out this bla
He'll tell you he loves you.
He'll talk real sweet.
You'll think he loves you.
You're just a piece of meat.
First, there's denial.
He wouldn't do that.
He cared about me once.
In my short 16 years of life I've put myself into some crazy situations.
when it breaks it doesn't make a sound
there is no indication of its condition
it just gives in, falling prey
to the repetitive oppression
of day after day after day.
Love and school and work and love.
Ever feel like your life as a teenager is just too much?
You love, and you work and you love, but in reality in will never be enough.
Love hurts
And work hurts more.
Little teacher in the front
I wish I could say what I want
Like how I’m tired from the night before
From all the things I’m expected to endure
Tossing, turning, sleep-deprived
Everything’s okay, mommy lied
Roses are red
Violets are blue.
I'm not at all jealous
Or angry at you.
I'm just hurt from the truth
That everyone told me
So now I just want to
Make sure you're not near me.
The sun glows.
The winds blow.
But it means nothing
Without your love.
The times we spent
Came and went.
Like shooting stars
From up above.
I wish I had
I frequently think of why i belong here, yes on Earth. What is the purpose of our lives?
It takes a while for something to grow, but once it does it begins to blossom, nothing will get in the way of stopping it.
i waited what fells like a thousand years
but id wait a million more for you
no one prepared me for
what i'd feel like when im not with you
if i'd only felt the warmth when im in your touch
It's a black wave
It hits you gradually,
Then all at once.
It drowns you
You can't call for help
Everyone sees you
They think you know how to swim
Everyone watches you
A rainstorm of words, A twister of thoughts blunder inside my mind like a spinning top,
It will not seize nor do I want it to; I am a writer and this is what I do,
She looks in the mirror who she sees is not who she is.
Happiness, lies
Sadness will arise
Anger will well let fly
And joy will go goodbye
He stands there
Without a care in the world
A lover by his side
A girl to take his hand
The tears wash down her face
He doesn’t want her
He doesn’t need her
I feel it on the inside. I feel it in my soul. I feel this certain something that makes my body whole.
His fingers brush through her hair
And his words camouflage the pain in her heart
He does not realize what he has initially done
Blinded By Lust,
Heart Full Of Mistrust,
What Does He See Really,
What Do The Other Men See,
See So Special In Me?
Why Do They Chase Me?
I'd give anything to change the depression that takes over the expressions of my mother. My mother,Who once wore a smile that complemented her asthetic face,
Is your adoration for me the same as the world's or different?
You wake up
and I may not be the first to see you - clothes indescent and feet bare....
but either way,
I'm the first to await your initial step....
Sure, there's tons of things in life that aren't fair,Like no one being equal, despite what everyone "fights" for,
Beth & Natalie
No words strong enough in tragedy,
Loving you with every breath.
Forevermore, watching over us
Here lies Lenore, in eternal slumber
Living no more, forever encumbered
My sweet love, fueling my emotions
Beauty of a dove, like a thousand oceans
If I could sum up, all the feelings I experience
When I look into your eyes, so beautifully bright
So close-up, demeanor so imperious
Thoughts are flowing in my head continously and confused.Is he even aware that I'm here?A smile he gives me in the hallway comes and goes.He talks with other girls the same way too.
I’ve been sailing for some time now,
Even if I’m not sure how.
Been here since the sun was bright,
But now it’s pale and lacks that light.
I do all to make it float,
I feel nothing. The world is nothing to me. I take steps, never feeling the ground below me. I touch hands, never feeling the electric energy flowing through our meeting. I speak words, that make no noise. I hear sounds, that have no volume.
The release of my emotions,
The movement of my soul,
The language of my heart,
Dance.
There are no limitations,
no expecations,
but only beautiful improvisations.
Let go, to feel
Hush little baby, put down the knife, I am here now, you'll win this fight. I know it may seem hard, but just believe me, life will get better, just wait and see. I know it seems dark now, but you'll see the light, so long as you do
Emotions can run wild, confusing even the smartest people
Emotions can wreck your life if they are not controlled right
Emotions can bring you true happyness if you express them well
Tears are streaming down his eyesUnder the desk lays a broken boyEmptiness contains an empty roomNobody asks the question why Under the desk lies the broken boyHe screams in pain
I sit next to you every night and feel the tension.
You still can’t see why I want to be with him,
Why I love him so dearly,
How I could ever be with anyone like him,
And one day, I hope you will.
I look up to cry the tears of the sky,
The gray pasture covering me in its familiar cold
I am crushed under the weight.
People would say to me, Stand up, you’re fine.
And I would try, Oh how I would try.
I haven’t met that guy that’ll turn my life around
Show me the light with every gentle caress
That has a smile that can warm a million cold hearts
The laughter of sweet innocence and happiness
Él bebió hasta que
su corazón se le fue.
Caminó en tres bares,
y empezó a pelear con los hombres.
Yo lo observé sangrar y beber.
As it arrives everything diesThe leaves change colorNature's beauty diesBut one true beauty remains in galore
I have a disease.
I've had it all my life.
I never had symptoms until age 13.
I didn't want to deal with it so I ignored it until I was 15.
I knew I could no longer avoid it.
I wanna run away
Away from all the hurt and pain
Painful mistakes and irony misplaced
Crying................
That is all I know
Pain like Fire
This pain I’m feeling,
is unlike anything I’ve ever felt,
Lost,
Confused,
Heart broken,
it’s an everlasting nightmare.
This pain I’m feeling,
In the cellar where my sanity should be, there's chipped stone walls enclosing the life I hadMy smooth skin scratches up against the rigid corners of the wall.
I was 13.
Looking in the mirror,
It never dawned to me why,
Why the window between my teeth,
The disproportionate nose,
The “five-head”,
Too sufficient for just a bang,
Not brown
I miss you. What can I say?
My burning desire of wanting to be with you grows by each passing day.
I see the world in black and white now because you're not here with me.
How does death choose?
Who we lose?
How does it pick them?
Each victim.
I wish it hadn't picked you.
I had no choice as your voice
just faded away,
and day after day
Soon flowers will growin the deepest and saddest partsof you and you'll bloom
You will always have people in your life that test you
There will always be people there to knock you down
It may seem that all the negative people are stuck to you like glue
It's the absence of warmth.The familiarity of a hand upon your shoulder.It's departure leaving all but an imprint.
Darkness floods you veins,Your eyes have become reflecting pools,Black like dreamless sleep,You ache for the affection,
I want to fall into you,Like butter on warm toast,Snow on a summer day,The fragrance of a slow cooked roast.
FOOD FOOD FOOD
Every ravenous soul cries for
What is food at all?
Is it Satisfaction...?
Or a remedy to survival...think about it -
I see food as Cruel, Enemy, Evil, Vicious...
When love gets a little easier
Maybe I'll be able to say hello and not have my eyes rain
Maybe the tulips will finally bloom properly and maybe the dandelions will finally blow in my direction and cover my face with their wishes
When will things be different….will I ever get back the innocence I’ve lost. Will I ever smile again and have the light that twinkled in my eye?? Every day is a struggle to go on and to push through all the demons that haunt me.
One step out the door
Come back!!!
I can't do that, I've gone to far. I've stepped into deeper waters and I'm drowing. I've dug my own grave and the world is slowly closing in.
You can't do this!
I know you think about situations and say,
"That would never be me." You say
I could never be that girl that's acting all fast as if she has no home training" or
Old friend I see your back
my heart was not ready for attack
I was happy or a moment
I am slow to learn
happiness never lasts
I don't know why I am surprised
It obvious just from my past
I live to see the sunshine, brighter than the green on pine
I live to see the rain, gloomy and forever a pain
I live to eat, stuffing my mouth whereever I find a seat
I live to drink, only to end up in the kitchen sink
Close ur eyes go under luke warm water an stay there for 5 minutes
thats how life was for me
'picture a darkness that is trying to take over
think of trying to scream
i cant hear
She tears through the darkness
A dim glow of changing light
With colors reduced to Bright Flame and Ash
Her usually strong spirit is bruised
But a spark of beauty shimmers within the eyes
Trembling hands and bloodshot eyes
Slowly, their hands drift from one another
“This isn’t really happening!” she cries.
I only see you in my dreams though I look for you always when I'm walking down the street and in every crowd I look out hoping to see your face (dreading actually seeing you,
I don't think they realize
how staring at these walls
through blooshot eyes,
can slowly kill you.
You take so much in society
that it slowly eats away at your soul.
You begin to feel uncomfortabl
And it began, again.
The battle between my mind and heart.
"He deserves better than you!"
"He will never love you!"
"You are way too fat!"
"You aren't his type!"
"He will never love you!"
Heartbreak is not something that is easy to take
For it clouds the mind and causes the esteem to effortlessly break
Hours upon hours are spent of you picking up the pieces
Wrote this in the wee hours of the morning, sort of in a trance like state.
There's a quiet thunderstorm inside my head,
the thoughts strike across my brain,
neurons illuminate with light, transmitting more than what is visible by sight.
There's a quiet thunderstorm inside my head.
I'm irritated
Frustrated
Angry
Everything is botteling up
Like soda
That is shaken up
Ready to burst and make a mess
Showing my emotions seems like a test
Ever wonder what it’s like to stare into the eyes of someone and get lost?
Like you’re in a jungle on a dark winter night?
Or how about when you’re drowning, and you can’t save yourself;
Soft light falls through the trees
Falls like the last leaves of autumn
Blowing in the breeze
And here I am missing you
Missing you
Tell me, do you miss me too?
You fill me up
Then drink
I am your partner during dark nights
And your enemy
Once you've had your fun
And had your fill
You leave me on the table
And go to enjoy life's thrill
First it was the day met
Then to our endless conversations
Our first date to first kiss
Two weeks in and went down hill
Things I shouldn't let happen but it was to late
A pained existence
Fear creates wounds
Fear is agony
Fear has become pain
Pain that is as intense as a woman screaming into the night
Because fear is the room she has been trapped in.
I want you to say no, I want you to reject me.I want you to say yes, I want you to want me.
Anything but this, stuck blinded in the midst,no sense of direction,struggling to contain my affection.
If tomorrow I didn’t wake up and I died,how many of you would cry?How many of you would sigh,and just move on with your lives?No pain trapped inside,just another body without life.No priest to confide,
Pain is a sign that something is wrongMissing is a sign that you're not where you belongLonging is a sign that you're not done yet;Remembrance a sign that you're not to forget.Love is a sign that something is right;
It all started with the right hook
A shock thru the spine
Redirecting the foot
Trembling in the knee
and signaling for the left hook
1,2,3,4
Remembering the days her eyes was a beacon of hope
I never really feared anything. But
As I sit here in my room filled with fear, I feel all the screams and anger from downstairs
They shoot up my spine and over-take my body
I sit alone,trying to talk to you,but you dont want to talk,you never do,you only have one thing on your mind,its always that one thing.Dont you care about me?What about me?
they don't get itthey don't realize they're poisoning you with their wordsthey don't see that you've got a
He is gone forever, the boy named Alex.
The seraphs come down beside me singing really taunting, " He who you call brother is with us."
This damaged girl coming from a broken home, no hope left leaving it all torn,
Not a single soul for help in times of discord,
What happened to all the love and care from her supposed friends?
She always comes & goes.
It is better to leave, before she is left.
She always comes & goes.
She leaves before she is left.
The friends she makes,
Are kept for years –
Thoughts are racing through her mind
When you ask her if she's all right
All she says is, "I'm fine"
You shake your head and reply, "okay"
The silence echoes in your brain
Writing all of my feelings
Will relieve me from all these teasings
That will make me jealous in life.
I just wanted a better life,
But yet, I won't be anybody's wife
We kissed, I felt her lips connect as if we were one, and yet I wanted more. I could not resist her, her looks of pleasant torture, and warmest of the body. Long ago, her beauty vanished, and left there was nothing but hate.
I live in a time
Where people have many walls.
I also live in a time
Where people desire to overcome these walls
In any way possible.
They have walls of anger and spite
Inside their body and mind.
They judge before they get to know me, they see an alien not a human being. I am a threat to society, so they say, yet all I ever do is stay the same.
the waves in the ocean flow
through the open holes in my heart
hoping someday this time i can finally see the end of this shining light
The chained bird weepsBeatenLying at its masters feetHot tears of angerSilther down its cheekSick of being trappedBy defeat,The chained bird weepsThe little bird rages
If the sun burned hot enough would I still miss your eyes?
If the moon was always full would I stop wishing for clear skies?
If the grass was green enough would I be satisfied without you?
Because if you are to love me
there are some things you must know
for one i am broken
and hurt
and my view on love is blown
I have to start from scratch
and learn how to love again
Lies, passion...so discreet, live in the eyes of the loves who meet. Blinking and sweating with zeal, your soul saddens when my heart you cannot steal.
My chest is heavy and it's hard to swallow.....it's different this time. I don't recognize what I'm staring at. A sad smile hiding foolish insecurities about what to do next.
To him, what have I done
was it worth it in the end
are the joys of love really real?
or is true love just pretend
to love him as my own is sin
to leave him would kill me
i shelter what i feel within
And as the days go by you rub away at me and peel back the pages of my skin
Soon I shall be raw,sore and broken
And as the days go by you rub away at me and peel back the pages of my skin
Soon I shall be raw,sore and broken
I know am not the most perfect, beautiful women in the world, you took me to your home, you gave me love, happiness and affection.
You look at me
And what do you see,
Some ‘confidence’ and ‘empathy’,
So you waltz right up expecting me
To be your loving Savior.
I tried to run
I tried to hide
Tried to fight the monster that’s inside
But I see an endless sun
I think of when I showed my fear
Love is like a drug once you've taste it
Searching for that same feeling
But I forgot to pace it
A dream divineIs only a nightmareIf a thought is to blind beyondMeasures I often question such a beautifulCurse of a dreamIs it only a reality that we often wonder?
In the midst of dayThere I sit in my roomAnd stare awayMy water is tainted and condensendingAnd my mind slowly blows smoke ringsI watch the stoney trees
I remember that day when we first met
you spoke naught and only looked at me and shyly smiled
but
that day I somehow knew that we were meant to be
your brown eyes ripped through mine heart and saw me
Im lingering on the edge and i dont know what to do, im doing something i didnt want to happen.
The echo of an empty hall
White shadows on the placid wall
A waft of he, departs from breeze
And corner eye I chance to see
Complacent lips, that part for me.
Then mind by strings turns body 'round
The weather is gloomy.
It hangs in the air,
Its unpredictable patterns,
Remind me of someone that I hold dear,
My best friend is this way,
It’s sad to think that she is hurt and unhappy,
Love is a question mark that hangs above my head,
It is like a butterfly that takes the risk of being dead,
Love can be the root to many other emotions,
Like despair which is as treacherous as all of the oceans.
You always thought, your kids will never know the feeling of addiction, but I went to re
Emotions explode in a definite roar
Pushing rational thoughts away
Logic shatters across the marble floor
Leaving nothing but cities of gray
Now as I gaze into the open door
My bear is with me nightly, as i fall into smooth slumber.
Sometimes i dream, most times i don't, but its there through it all,
Its there when you aren't. My only friend, confidante.
Love-- it means nothing now
but flirting and empty sound
it's physical and short last
nothing like was in the past.
There was a time when "I do"
Meant I want to spend my life with you.
My anger pours out as I scream for some release.
I want to be gone and away from this beast.
Nothing I say is ever enough for you.
I cannot be content as long as I'm being used.
Set me free I repeatedly scream.
Despair and darkness have taken over my life
This is nothing new
I've gone through and put up with a lot of strife
What is one more day of hell when your life is a pit of fire?
You ruined me
Ooh farewell
Ooh farewell
Sorry to see you go
My hopes where
For you to come home again
Praying for the sun to shine on you
Never to be rained on by falling bullets or falling bombs
Heart that beats pain is something you can't
see, you can only feel if you were that person
Don't try to come and tell them to feel differently
They will not listen because you don't know the whole truth to it
Last year I sketched our dream home
with two balconies and a koi pond in the backyard.
It was simple pen and paper
It's true to say,
Every girl has flaws,
And it's true that its displayed
Every guy has been clawed.
But ones for sure,
For me it's a personal tour.
I can say that I've loved
In this universe, there’s too much pain
From people to people, it’ a non-ending train
Trying not to give in time
Wasting is not a try
Good, bad, jealous, uncaring
A rose, but one, none other rose did I have,
A rose, one rose, and this was a wondrous creation,
One rose a rose that brightened earth and sky,
One rose, my rose, that sweetened my breath and air,
I was not born mean
I was born into treachery
Riding on glaring black wheels
My heart's left black eye caught feelings
Who knew a handsome fellow
Had inherited Jack the Ripper's thirst
I sit in psychology,
A class I should be interested in, but instead worry
About the little problems that I have that do not reflect any other person
Except myself.
This sounds normal.
The point of the pen cuts deeper than the bladeIt leaves its mark, on my skin, the pageFinger print lines, lies on those lipsIt dripsInk glistens, follows veinsA sick beat trailing after your blood
The case of a bladeIn the darkest placeI clutched it through fabricThrough every feelingA portal to a memory long goneThe blood on your handsThe smile on your lipsf̶e̶l̶t̶ feels so good
Ideas born out of 2amGrown to wrap around my eyesPull them downThey will not shutConstant spike of ideasIn my brain, it hurtsThe throb of thought against boneI am not destined for sleep
Anxiety flows over you, toppling and sending radical shivers of coldness throughout your body. It makes a cold sweat and a nervous shake; Causing overthinking and a racing heart.
There is a notion that
Crying is Romantic at night
Alone into the bed sheets
But the truth is
It can hit at dawn
Or in the afternoon
In the shower
In a crowded room
In a big room
I had yearned for so long
I had waited for too long
I died inside for too long
no love no compaasion
no warm embrace
not even a tender touch
quiet nights
desperate mornings
We've All had that kin of love,
where we fall so hard
we've all fallen for the one person who can
do no wrong
to us
we've all gotten to that point
We've all been wraped up in
the phenomena of
I wanted to be the one that you wanted
But a relationship just isn't what you had in mind
And ain't nothing wrong with a good time, it's fine
Heres a story like to tellabout this boy i thought i knew so wellthought he was the one for me all the other boys i couldn't seeit should have been me and you i could have been you and i
as she sped down the interstate going 90
she saw things
she saw her father hanging off a power line
a tv cord permitting him death
she would see the cord murdering him
In the silent waves she saw herself,
Lost and confused, she cried for help.
Through the screams and moans that came tumbling out,
The distorted images that filled her with doubt.
No longer could she stand alone,
Talking to my mothers graveUsed to be the hardest thing everI would just cry my eyes outThinking she would be back never
They call me the "Ice Queen" for a reason.
I honestly don't know what happened.
Even when I was kid, young, naive, and believing in everything, I didn't believe in myself
Don't tell me you're sorry
If it takes my blood
Dripping to the floor
For you to notice
You're not truly sorry
You're just desperate
For a quick relief
Like you walk past
an amusement park
But you don't have
a ticket
when
You go to Sunday church
with your family
She isjust like everyone else,just like any other girl,liking her clothes and shoesAnd the silly things in life.But then she isn’t.
I am a dog on a leash
Willing and trying to move forward
But something is always holding me back
Therea are days
When I look around,
I see other girls
Walking around
And I just break down,
Like I can't do this any more,
And I start to wonder
if it'll ever get better.
Alex Noe, I love you
You make me feel very special
But you have to know
I won when I first met you
Only been a month
It feels right to say “I love…”
I believe in us
I know we can make this work
I need times like this--to myselfTo cook up formulas with words that explode, sending minds into the unknown.Hidden messages through similes and metaphors that'll make the greatest fold
I'm so confuse
alone and a mess,
I'm sitting in this fucking desk
staring at my messy grades,
there worst then a wreck
where can i reset?
These teachers don't help,
Alone.
Always I am alone.
No one to turn to and nowhere to run,
it isn't on purpose and it isn't fun.
I try to stand up,
I try to speak out,
but always I am told that without a doubt,
It feels like I been here before I feel familar with this scene these words theses actions I feel like its on everyones minds thoughts lips tounge, its been in every corner of the world this feel to familar yet it has no shape, nor organic matte
Dancing Shadows
By Laquanna Allen
In today’s society
There is only one thing you can be
The bully or the bullied
Round and round
I'm nothing special
Not beautiful
Not talented
Not funny
Not smart
I'm just an average girl
Destined for an average life
For meaningless experiences
And dismal opportunities
I feel like
I'm walking upstream
through a current strong enough
to pull me under again.
I
Just
Want
To know
If I died today
Who would cry tonight
Who would miss school tomorrow
Who would regret their actios next week
Would anyone stand tall like a mountain for next year
I grew tired of sleepless nights-
Contemplating life while simultaneously
Managing to not participate in it.
Well here I am again
left broken and confused.
They hurt me
and I feel used.
I used to be strong
till they broke me apart.
I used to have life
but now they broke my heart.
as of right nowI'd rather be a poor woman on the street no food to eati don't wont no but if i have to crylooking down seem like i had it all
Believe me,
I am aware
Of every single flaw
Or imperfection
That creates my
Monstrous existence.
So who are you
To come and blame
My imperfections
For making me
I came home and found you in your usual spot, hiding from the world.
Dark despide the sun being awake.
Your eyes are open yet nobodys home, you stare straight ahead without following my movements.
i
i w
i wa
i wan
i want
i want t
i want to
i want to b
i want to be
i want to be f
i want to be fr
i want to be fre
i want to be free.
Where are you going,
I can't find you,
where are you going,
I just trusted you,
Where are you going tonight.
I just wanted you,
and I just needed you,
I am waiting, I am alone,
My life is like a bad fairytale.
Dragons lurk in every cave,
ogres in every shadow.
When I get to the place where the castle should be,
what do I see?
The evasive palace has escaped me.
Powerful word:
Ignored. Emotionally and physically.
Why does the world have the mentality of every man for itself?
Feeling lonely and unimportant.
Both in home and the world.
I want to love you for forever and a day.
Til the sun comes down, and its time to lay.
Til, the wind blows and the seas roar.
I wanna be with you, but dont forget theres one more.
My blood ran cold as he looks at me,i shiver as his breeze past me, i look apon his face and i worry... why is this i wonder?
Hey Mr. Principal,
Hey Mr. Smith,
I hope you sit comfortably –
On your plush office plinth,
With all your private accolades –
That no one could care about,
To the varsity trophies –
This is the blood i bleed
There is a reason for this pain
Some people just never understand
The pain i go through is too much to withstand
This pain i go through is worse than any other
--How much pain
How many tears
How many times must I say the word LOVE
How many broken hearts must I suffer from
How many times do I have to stare at a blank response
How many lies
To think you would care
To think you would understand
but I liked believing you did
The sweet oblivion was better
than facing the cold hard truth
Turns out you never knew me
Eventually
Eventually you’ll run out of tears,
Eventually you’ll run out of fears.
Eventually you’ll run out of sadness,
How do I stop from watching the spiders crawl around my bedroom corners?
Are people not spiders?
Crawling from corner to corner making a mess in order to thrive of flies around my room.
Love
a 4 letter word, though it holds so much gravity
yet we throw it around like something thats only worth a penny
Hate
A clear-cut diamond ring,
Fall, winter, summer, spring.
Seasons change,
The birds still sing.
Those lovely hazel eyes,
Lies, disguise,
Another surprise.
Who would have thought,
There's nothing i wouldnt do just to see you again
All the words i've said have no meaning
With this mess i've made i must do all the cleaning
I told you i loved you
But you left me with no clue
Let's pop some pills, Fall in loveCut our wrists and spill our bloodDrink come Gin, let's die tonightCome on Demons, help end our lifeLet us bleed, for what we see
Let's pop some pills, Fall in loveCut our wrists and spill our bloodDrink come Gin, let's die tonightCome on Demons, help end our lifeLet us bleed, for what we see
I know this girl Who has a broken heart Who wants to cry Who wants to die Who wears a fake smile But has a friend that tells her "Stay strong , everything will be okay." She wants to scream She wants to shot But wont....... She remembers all
All the cliques laugh away
While I sit and watch
Wondering where my friends are
Wondering where you are
Wondering why distance keeps us apart.
The teachers will lecture
I am scared of
this snake that
sucks the life out
of me.
I am scared of
this butterfly that
plagues my dreams
at night.
I am scared of
this spider that
Every day's a waste.
I'd rather have just died.
I try to get though it.
Believe me, I've tried.
I am so tired of feeling
Like no one gives a shit
Not my friends or parents.
Im so done with it.
I always said it couldn't happen to me I always said my heart cant be broken I always said I would never cry I always said I don't fight for boys I always said NO FATHERS ALLOWED I always said I don't believe in love But now I say that you change
Could one let a whole lifetime pass,
without feeling like they've walked on broken glass?
Could one look into rain out of window,
and say they've never felt a drop of sorrow?
Teacher, teacher
I'm not sure if you know
My mind may be open
But my heart remains closed
Teacher, teacher
Please, just hear me out
There are so many things
I'm in distress
You are not
I came to you for comfort
I laid all my problems on the table
Frustration
Anger and fatigue
You looked at me
With pity
For half a moment
I don’t understand
Why so many kids
Feel this way
About living this life
We’ve never had to
Pay a bill
Love is hallow as a cave
Led by its beauty, a great quest
Love is a path for the brave
It will never settle for less.
Little girl why are you crying
Is it cause everyone keeps lying
Saying its gonna get better
But your face just keeps getting wetter
Little girl why are you so sad
Take my hand feel the warmth emitting from the sand
as ashes burn I will learn not to break
Fragile soul, what more could be at stake?
Oh dear one, don't abandon me
Oh dear one, hear my prayer
You give me some kind of feeling.
I'm excited,
Yet a little scared and apprehensive at the same time.
Will I do it right?
Will I be good enough?
I tried to give you a chance.
All you wanted to do was play games.
My love out in the open; obvious at first glance.
I fell for the charm; the way you said my name.
The way you held yourself. I was blinded.
Love is something I don't understand.Hell, I don't think anyone does.When you say "I love you."And they say "Don't."How do you expect me to changeThe way I feel about youIt's not much of a choice.
Kiss my lips and empty me, love me long and set me free.
I'll give you it all, even me. Or crush me quick and leave me be. Our love is strong..in harmony
Love is only temprary.
You clenched at my chest,
For a sweet rational moment.
Heart drop.
Bottom rock.
The bitter grin
Made my face numb like gin.
The only
Substance
That can
Be
Absorbed
I ran.
As fast as I could.
To try to get away from him.
From the hurt.
But he always found me.
I screamed.
I ran the other way.
But I found myself in the end back in his house.
I'm sorry that I fell in love
Sorry that I think you're perfect
Sorry that You're the one
I didn't mean to bother.
I didn't mean to push you away
Didn't mean to go insane
I just wanted you to stay
What Did i Do That Was So Wronq
All iReally Wanted Was For Us Tew Ghet Alonq
I Thought This Relationship Was PERFECT :)
But iGuess He Doesn't Feel The Samee And That Really Does Hurt Me
Firm arms wrapped around my waist
Chocolatey skin I can almost taste
Your words caress my senses
But strangely provoke my defenses
These words you speak, are they even yours?
Stuck in my mind,
but I must rewind.
Death seeks everyone,
its part of life.
There is a limit of time,
passes by like the speed of light.
Containing wonderful memberies,
I hate this feeling. The feeling of hitting your breaking point. You're so broken and shattered on the inside. How can it get any worse? But then it does. And you feel like you can cry an ocean, and drown in your own painful tears.
Blue
for tears
the sadness
hidden inside.
Green
just as emeralds
vibrant
alive.
Gray
dark clouds
preventing one
to enter her soul.
Another soul was lost
A soul who forgot the meaning of hope
A gun to the head
No warning given to others
Why?
I guess he just gave up
#RIPCameron
Society killed the teenager.
What did we expect?
That the words would roll off their shoulders?
No responsibility to collect?
Society killed her.
They said she wasn’t pretty enough.
I know what this is.
This is the hammer you wield
Pounding against my head.
Though you are no Thor,
But rather a monster
The way he makes me feel
The feeling is unreal
He makes me feel pretty
He's not the one I imagined
But still he makes my heart flutter
The way he stares at me is not uncomfortable
I dreamed of you last night
I dreamed that you were with me all through the night
I dreamed that you held me close and never let go
I dreamed that you whispered in my ear
And told me that you loved me
I could always jump, you'd find my body in a dump.
Body broken like my soul, for its spirit no longer could hold.
I could always cry, sometimes wishing I could die.
A poem a day
Keeps the darkness at bay,
Extracting my emotions
Sets my creativity in motion,
My writing is a hiding place
Where I can disappear without a trace,
I submerge in the waters of passion
The world as she knows it comes to an end.The pain, the suffering, the life of my best friend.Her soft fluffy body so frail and so depleted,I can't help but to think that her life wasn't completed.
I remember like it was yesterday
that we talked, joked, and laughed
and now that you are not here
that is all in the past
I can see clear as day
a smile spreading across your face
The days I spent living my life in the shadow of another are wasted.
Why must I skulk in the shadows while you get to walk in the light?
Is it possible that perhaps I was never meant to be seen, to be noticed?
My feet smell
And neglect appears to be my only friend.
People hang out and talk with me
We share only words
Though nothing articulate.
a release
a shot of blood right to the end
spilling out
from something dead
so much thought from that cold corpse
it overflows
on to a different source
find food
find breath
Point your finger at Me,
For I am the only target to see.
I was blind
And I was naive.
I didn't see
How I affected you,
Or how I affected Me.
But time has passed,
Get me out of this placeMy heart breaks like glassLet it shatter and it runs a different paceIt's messing with my head, one minute i'm with you now suddenly i'm hereWhen will this end?
Hey Girl!
Why are you walking alone on the beach?
Hey Girl!
Don't you see a storm is brewing?
Girl turns to me,
with her long hair and dress billowing in the wind,
and she says,
What the hell is wrong with these peopleTreating others way less than equalWe have to fix this nowCause this isn't a movieAnd there won't be a sequelAn ignorant mind is feeble
Birds fly awayAs the sky turns black and greyMeteors rainBuildings engulfed in flamesPeople are crazed, enraged, and others are afraidExpected to listen to what the TV said
Life is precious, fragile,
and an amazing experience.
Memories last forever.
The good, the bad,
every important memory,
can never
be forgotten
Rolling around outside,
She sits all alone
In a room full of hate
She stares at their eyes
And notices they’re fake
……………………………
Pantoum: Orphan Wishes
1 She wished she knew who her parents were.
2 She knew only of those in the orphanage.
3 But their souls could not fill up her gap.
I want to hide in the in-between spaces of your thoughts
And to fill the gasps that escape from your lungs.
I want to throw myself into the depths on your soul
I dream at night, as we all do
I'm at a loss of all control of my mind, lost in my dream.
The darkness is suffocating as it engulfs me entirely,
Physically, emotionally, mentally.
Sad is she,
Who does not open her eyes,
Who thinks with only facts,
Who believes with only figures.
Lonesome is he,
Who thinks of only his way,
Who only knows of his approach,
It's all cutting into her, the more she tries, the more she bleedsShe feels like she can't choose right from wrongShe can't solve that problemWhy should she try, she feels like she doesn't matter
I’ve only just met you
And I feel you slipping away
Like seashells on beach shores
As the waves crash harshly
Just like my heart
I am like the phoenix.
When I burn, I burn with passion.
I engulf in pain and sorrowful
lessons that twist the flames
in a cyclone of
radiant, red, rotating fire.
The hard way.
Feel sick to my stomach...Just want to throw-up...
Trying to stay positive, but real, as well...
Seeing things I dislike...Thinking about things that are out of sight, but still in the mind....
Once upon a time
Feeling all alone
I was plucked from my roots
Carried to a new place forced to call home
I am Lost
Travelling place to place
In search of a new mother
Maybe a dad
Sitting on the floor, thinking of it all.
Watching the clock move slow on the wall.
You say you love me..but where are you now?
All it took was a phone call for you to say chow.
A word that many kids seem to take advantage of
Who really knows the meaning of love?
Teens are too naive to realize the main truth
Guys don’t understand the meaning, we aren’t sleuths
I paint my face with clayOf the river bed,Let my tears wash into the bayAs the ocean spreads,What a magical potionIn every emotion,
Drink Me up.
You weren’t a waste,I was just a hassle.I wanted one taste,But I tore you apart,And I ruined your life.I caused my own demise,My apocalypse..
Lost in love,
I don't want to be found,
Dear God I have never seen
an angle this close to the ground.
Being lost in love is such a strange feeling,
not being found just sounds so appealing.
Body Language
With the strut of the Wind,
The boundless flow of time.
Our minds tend to flutter,
With an undying chime.
Speaking through tocs and tics
Vision scattered,
I don't know why I feel so alone
I look back and see only love as I've grown
Assistance, nurturing, tenderness and care
things children would kill for everywhere
yet I'm not happy, it's not selfishness or greed
I don't know why I feel so alone
I look back and see only love as I've grown
Assistance, nurturing, tenderness and care
things children would kill for everywhere
yet I'm not happy, it's not selfishness or greed
Live, laugh, love, have freedom
Walk, run, enjoy the sun
Be happy, be sad, be angry, go crazy
Cry, smile, hug each other
Sing together
Dream together
Feel each other’s pain together
The water. It crashes over perfectly glazed-over, deep grey sand gently-- striving not to crack the breathtaking surface of reflections.
The sun. It sinks quietly into the majestic purple and nectarine colored sky like silk.
Flowers in the Spring,
Blooming bright and tall.
Rugged old pine trees,
Covered with snow in Fall.
The clear Texas sky,
With clouds that loom above.
Quiet, sweet,
Grab a hand and stand together
let here a heartfelt welcome
hand by hand race by race
together we stand equal
strong and firm
We are never alone
so be a friend and lend an ear
I can't go a day without you, you're a drug.
Intoxicating, just like rum.
Crawling beneath my skin.
I can almost taste you, sweet as sin
keep me awake for daydreaming has become too dangerous for me
Screaming at the top of your lungsBlasting the speakers all the way upEvery emotion in every songIt's impossible to get enoughMelodies of understandingLyrics sing the truthMusic filled with feeling
Those tear filled nights where you toss and turn,
Mind won't stop and the heart does burn.
Your words tonight cut in real deep,
So deep that it prevents my sleep.
I hoped you had intentions to mend,
She grows in a special pot.Made of wires and fear.Commonly broken and torn through.But always put back in her place.She's cared for and dusted,Her eyes behind the glass box,Sees a world she can never touch,And a world that will never touch her.Sh
Blood drippingLegs closedArms coveredFeelings exposed
Hearts racingWounds unhealedMorbid thoughtsLips are sealed
Alone AloneYou left againA knife in my backIgnorant men
Myself;
As expansive as the ocean,
Yet also a wanderer within its great depths.
With no thought at all I flow with its motion,
But resistance is found when I consider my breadth.
Deeper than the submarines,
A low ache
A growing pain
Too hard to see
What I could gain
Darkening skies
A clouded soul
Listless wandering
Without a real goal
Faintly I sigh
Blankly I look
A feeling so strong, it can't be hidden.
Nothing you can do about it, so you hold it all in,
but you're afraid the truth will slip out;
your secret will be uncovered.
I should be happy But for some reason I'm sad I can't understand the game you're playing It feels like we're on different levelsYou're funny, cute, and awesome But I can't seem to feel what I've felt before
Violent reds swirling
Drowning the pitiful fading white tint
Vibrant crimson clouds shrouding the canvas
Angst
Self loathing
Fear
A tainted brownish purple explodes and shatters inner thoughts
My mother is the queen,
For control is all that matters.
My father is the king,
The foreseer of decisions.
Mother fends for her bishops,
But they cannot save her children.
I was once something that carried a message with ideas, emotions, and a purpose, made from thoughts. For only a short time do I exist to serve my purpose,
Rivulets fall from your eyes
Have you forgotten how to smile?
You never speak of the starry skies
Have you forgotten how to dream?
I wonder why your eyes avoid mine
Unforgettably forgettable
You never paid attention to her, not even if it was critical
The society would see her, but she would still feel invisible
You'd hear her name, and intimation owls go, "who?"
Shelter disdainful epiphanies behind latched heart
For pity to sneakily evaporate
And emotions grow painfully tart
To mediate the dormant desire into blossomed state.
Drag Restless on her knees;
Delusion is trapped with confusion,imprisoned in my mind.Deficient time they passtaunting me, hysterically. They show themselves aloudSpilling out, pouring over.My actions, this is what they cause.Hidden in anger and sorrow,They sway incognitoAmon
I am Yin and he is YangI bring peace but he brings painI am pure, while he is corruptedI am collected while he is disruptive
I was never emotionless but
sealed tightly
in a box
stored somewhere
shut tight
(heaven help the one that opens it)
I-am-not-nervous
Iamnotnervous.
Breathe
I am not nervous.
Really, I’m not.
I may look a wreck:
tired eyes and hair a mess,
dressed as if
I haven’t done anything
I am from the southern part of Dayton, Ohio.
I am from my dad and granddad because my dad has anger management
And because my grandparents didn't want children,
And when I was born I was real sensitive on the inside
one door must close
for another to open
this is what you all propose
the cycle must have broken
closing, closing, closing
never to be reopened
but on I must keep going,
Why I write there's so many reasons!
I write to feel joy.
To feel pain.
To feel despair.
To feel angry.
To feel appreciated and free.
To feel wanted.
To hope and believe.
I always thought I was invincible
My heart a soft core in a shining outer exterior of steel
I thought I couldn't be affected by the dramas and complex problems of todays youth
As a look in the mirror, I stare back at my reflection
I see the picture of a troubled man;
Searching to find and gaze at a portrait of redemption.
His vision is fogged; amid dim depression and loss of understand.
From the deepest chambers of my heart
The darkest caverns of my soul
The most secret corners of my being
And the brightest pictures of my imagination
Ascend reflections of my past
why i writesuch a complex questionbut to save time, ill take the simplistic approachwriting is just a part of me,it comes deep from within my soulit give these people a look into my journeyinto my life
I close my eyes as I fall asleep,
I dream I can change the truth into reality,
My understandings shallow,
But still gradually expanding,
Searching for the profundity,
and only found a shadow,
From the moment my lungs
took notice of the smog-filled air
I heard my older sister saying, “Words have power.”
I wanted to believe.
That, when I mixed a piece of
Poems are my purpose, my resolve
A analyzable way to express myself
Follow along as you feel involve
To a meaning that could include yourself.
Writing gives me the power to feel free
Takes away the anxiety
Enforces me, encourages me, strenghtens me
When i'm too shy, too scared, too timid, not having the gut to say something out loud
Seeing the lines right in front of me, like everyday life --
I notice the sparks and lights mirror what's inside.
The beauty is not new to me, but some of us forget.
The true face of everything -- the beauty that lives.
Some people write to understand
Others do it for empowerment just to take a stand .
But why do I?
See I write to also understand
To understand who I am
Revealing parts of me I never knew existed.
I write because I have too many scars on my wrists
I write because I don't need to add to my collection of hospital bracelets
I bleed ink into the paper
I spill my thoughts to people I won't ever meet
When the pain gets too bad
when the world makes me way too mad
when I refuse to cry
When I just want to die
My anger and frustration goes to words
I may not always be able to speak
lately my grandmother has been practicing her english with the phrase:
no one should have to die with pain and suffering
the pencil marks bow through the pages so earnestly
Quiet girl, quiet girl
Speak up? She’d rather die
Tenses up in conversation
No one wonders why
Never talks to anybody
Isolation is her self-defense
Hides behind bangs too long
Fear
Black and cold as an evil man’s heart
Courses through the veins of all who experience the unknown
Struck like an icy hard bell in the dead of winter, cold pulse reverberating off every stone wall
Fear
When I am running
running from my problems
running from the world,
I can
Stop.
And think.
And write.
And be free.
And then maybe I can
Stop.
And see.
And know
What it means to me....
With each and every word a story is waiting to be heard.
From heartaches to heartbreaks I write what I feel.
I feel what I write, I'll never be the same again, I can only learn from my mistakes.
Before, I had nothing.
An empty bottle of ink; no quill.
Endless. White. Space.
Before, I was silent.
a pin cushion to prick.
a bag to punch.
no sound, just space.
Before, my emotions hurt.
Do you remember that you were the first lips I touched?
The first hand I held,
The first one I cared for,
The only one I ever loved.
Do you remember you made me smile when I first saw you?
The Clouds,
they press their whole existence
against the cold glass pane in the sky
and they watch us, but they are content,
they do not envy us, because,
The Clouds,
I write with curiosity and remembrance
My mind is always wandering and I tend to follow it
It gives me ideas and dreams of what could happen
I tend to find myself writing down the thought so I cannot lose it
I was a boy who was so confused.
I felt like a hopeless toy.
The joy starts to flow like the skies of my light.
It's hard to reminisce the battle wounds.
It guided me through my shame.
I use poetry to bring fort important discussions,
I don't believe in limiting topics because I'm young,
But for starters, I've lost friends,
They're legal and I'm just a teen,
Life seems frugal with a hint of mean,
Numb the pain
Or bring feeling back.
That equilibrium is vital
Too much feeling
I cannot function
Not enough leads to the same
Tell the world
how I feel.
They come together to be paired
So many of a kind -- individuals, yet inseperable
But with Time treading upon them
You find that they start to wear
And come apart at the seams
Alone in the cold, a feeling thats never old/
my hearts starting to mold, feelings outta control/
Tears dripping down the side of my cheek/
No one to lift me up when I feel so weak/
They just need a lighthouse keeper
some light to pull them into
and a person to hold the light steady
steady for them to see
and follow
steady like a tree
a tree that stands tall in the forest
Objectives thru journeys Which within them we, As culprits of our deeds, Die consecutively... Loops swaying around... Of life's need to fond... Caress scars and wounds... With which i so bound... Strides of loud strobes... Sights of glowing vibrat
POETRY helped me read.
I hated long words,
I hated long sentences,
But I saw something simple.
POETRY helped me read.
To me it’s quick,
To me it’s to the point,
When days are dim,
And the sky is gray,
There's nothin' like a smile,
To brighten your day,
When its a holiday,
Like Valentines,
There's nothin' like a hug,
Reassuring that your mine,
Our hearts beat as one when it comes to love,
But our minds part when it come to expression,
We fear going into a new development of trust
and possible heartache, But we endure our ability to
The way he stares,
makes me turn lush,
for eyes he glares,at me turn
mush.
I see myself in his eyes,
the want in his glare to have me
there in sighs.
And I said my share of words to spare,
Pain and agony
Miserable and heartbroken
Confused and afraid.
Amazed and hopeful
Compassion and empowered
Thankful and loving.
Inspired and touched
I’m at a state of confusion, so many emotions bubbling to the surface.
I hate you, I love you, I look up to you, I look down at you.
I'm just a girl who is trying to find the answers. Lost in the dark wanting to find the light, but I'm not alone here. Something is in the dark with me, something painful, sad, and depressing. He goes by the name of Misery.
So I'm finally reunited with my friend at long last, She is a close and dear friend from my past. Back then, everytime we talked was a moment of bliss, I was always thinking, "Man, it couldn't get any better than this." You see, back then I was
I find myself tied to a string,
There's an urge pulling at me.
I cut off all the heads of my enemies,
I begin to saw away at my personalities.
I saw fountains in mountains,
It was only a spring.
The darkness encloses slowly,
Circling my mind and keeping
Me from feeling anything.
Why am I always so alone?
Secretly weeping a river
Of memories to slip,
How can you love someone you know you aren't suppose to?
Yea, I'm talking about me I just don't know what to do.
The love is so strong..
but it seems SO wrong.
How could something that feels SO right be so wrong..
I was close
So close
To letting you go
Then you came back
Back into my life
Told me how you love me
How you've missed me
So I return those truths
Hope boiling over
Now I sit here
I hate you. I want you out of my life. I lied.
I love you. I wanted to make things work. I tried.
Your actions as well as your words cut me deep.
It has been the start of my life
and the birth of my heart.
It has sparked my interest
and left its mark.
Poetry has been a part of my life,
for many years it would seem.
It has helped me out
Noiseless voices in my head Asking, begging to be let free. Harshing breathing, Trembling hands, A small cry seeking help. Angry shouts, Loud words, Rumbling floors. Dark clouds blur my sight, Fear searches for the light. Years go by,
Sometimes going through depression is what makes a person
It gives a glimpse of reality
A vision with everlasting loneliness and destroyed self-image
This emotion holds one hostage
it all began a few years ago,
My eyes were opened, now i cant let it go.
It's my mom
she is the REAL bread winner in the fam
its a shame what she has for as a man
she works and works and nothing pays off
What Heaven is Made Of
Effect: An explosion of endorphins electrifying my heart.
An extreme curve of my passion filled lips.
Each piece of me hungers to give you all my love—all of me.
(poems go here)Ser Inmigrante Mexicano no es cosa del otro mundo
Significa trabajar tres veces más fuerte,
dormir con preocupaciones,
vivir con sueños,
Protected by a hard shell,
One of inspiration, happiness, and
Nothing more but pure positive energy.
A shell that connects with people.
Buried inside lies the truth.Pain, Hurt, confusion, aloneness.
Poetry is easy
Poetry is hard.
Poetry is meant to catch you off guard.
Poetry is loving.
Poetry is true.
Poetry is unsaid feelings between me and you.
I write because I was born in a place like hell
Where, I dare tell
Abuse is what my mother chose
After the finishing the bottle the anger arose.
There were usually some scars and bruises
Wat If I couldn't do it and couldn't changed my mind,
Wat If I did feel rushed and out of time,
Wat If it was my fault that things had changed,
Wat If there was no way it could be the same,
Now that I see how you feel deep down
The words I LOVE YOU slowly drown
A gargled sound that means nothing forever
I know that we can't ever be together
Cause you and I are in two totally different worlds
what if God took away the moon?will we ever see the night sky the same or different?if so, what would be the difference?will the dark side of the earth be ever luminated naturally at night?would we be more dependable on light to bright the night?
I miss you,
I want you,
I need you,
I love you.
4 different things,
All said to keep me around,
None will work,
Not anymore.
Why is it that the one person you try so hard to care about
Can't seem to get the message through their head?
Are they blinded by emotion?
Does you even matter to them?
Another day, another place,
Time to put on my happy face.
Paint my smile, erase my tears,
Reveal to none my greatest fears.
Beause there's something coming,
Something better,
Life has become to stray
Wanting to go away forever and a day
On time for the first bus ride
Just because you are trying to hide
You left because your parents hate
Honestly they didn’t want you to become bait
Laying here awake
thinking and not wanting to believe what I hear.
I don’t want any of it to be true, but deep down I know it is.
I can’t describe how bad it hurts, it’s beyond words.
Life experiences shaped me but ain't mold me
Till this day, I still remember what people told me
Told me I'd never be anything
I'd never rise
But now as I look, I see there's a part of me missing
I write to express the things I will never say. My thoughts of grief and joy. I write those feelings that others are wont to deny. I write when I feel broken, broken to where I am not certain of who I am.
These hands of mine
Carry the burden given by us all
The labor of surviving in the wild concrete jungle
Demonstrates itself in the form of sweat trickling
Pores widening, opening itself up to the world
There will be a day when you ignore someone you loved dearly.
There will be a day when you will never see who use to be your best friend.
There will be a day when you smile along with your worst enemies.
Once upon a time
there lived a boy
Raised in neutral conditions
Had a favorite toy
Didn’t have a lot of thing
That he could enjoy
Always been creative
And would never destroy
He grew up
Unrelenting tears of muscle
That reshape itself and this is
labeled as getting in shape
To endure such tears you need
hustle
Hustle to finish what you have started
Pause
Now go back to living
Like my dad did on rice and grits
Lost many and gained few to none new buddies
I don't call them friends
Trust and depend on them first
To rip apart my back and front
Plagued with infidelity
She fornicates in rhythms and melody
Driven by jealousy
In search of intimacy so she lies next to him
She says it isn’t love but she says it wasn’t lust
Poetry, or writing in general
is my life.
it is how i express every feeling in my body
My sadness
my happiness
my fears
my pain.
all of it.
every single emotion i go through
First glance
of eyes
opening,
Learned life
while running,
Sorrow
through the
times hoping,
Eyes closing
soft and slowly
How is perfection defined,
with collarbones?
or a gap between my thighs?
Perfection is all we see.
because images of beauty
reflect our insecurities.
Perfection is in my reach,
Is there a beginning of nothing?
Everything seems so distant.
As if it isn’t there.
As if it isn’t real.
Is life real?
My Brain, I want to shoot it.
My heart, I want to cut it.
For my feelings I don't want to feel one bit.
When these two things fight it out, it's hard to hear which one is screaming out loud.
Paper hearts, they tend to bleed,
The blood shall spill all over me.
Pieces broken like empty glass,
Nothing there to bring it back.
No glue, no tape.
Just scissors from a cutthroat soul.
No dress like this not like that
Eat this healthy food, don't get fat
Just tie my free will to heavy strong chains
Leave me damage on my brain
It's the same punishment as your doing now
Ever since I was a little girl, I was afraid
My circumstances had me in a whirl, but life still called my name
Then I got a little older....maybe a little too old for my age
And I gave up, because their lies were all the same
The fire in those eyes brings me to sudden silence,
The darkness beckons deeply; threatens to turn violent.
Life inside that mind must be eternal pain,
every word spoken as if it is in vain.
If I left yesterday
Would you miss me
Today
And forget me tomorrow?
If I started running
Would you chase me
Bring me back
To the lie of your arms
I sit outside
in the night alone.
Looking to the sky
for the lights that shine.
Resting here my mind wonders
from place to place.
I try to make sense
of how I became so impaired.
Boom. Like a dynamite.
Everywhere you can see it.
Her happiness is splattered all over the wall.
Her anger is in pieces all over the ground.
It reeks like sadness in here.
What lit the fuse?
Pain is silent demons, sometimes welcomed in our life
Often sorrowed for or about
The bloody red tears, that represent pain
Are all but real, for pain is what you feel
Tell me, do you feel pain from reading this poem;
I am a scared mouse running across the floor.
I am anxious candy waiting to be picked.
I am a soldier in the back line too scared to fight.
I am a lion without courage.
I am a tin man without a heart.
What is this I'm doing?
Falling from a building?
Left and right building move swiftly around me...
Below the hard surface 3....2....1...
Close my eyes hope to die...
Splat...or so I would have thought...
Intensity, intuition, in love
Intellect, practicality, and ration are all of thee above
Passion, emotions, and feelings are what drives us
Lying,deceiving, and cheating is what divides us
Blood burns inside her wrists so sore
until she’s writhing on the floor
in acute pain caused by the madness
of consuming ones heart and wanting more.
The red drips from her baby nose
Maybe you do not understand that the past is in the past, yet I am still chained to it.
Maybe you do not understand that every time someone mentions that theme I cringe.
Courage is a free creature, who soars among the clouds.
Its feathers are lined with hope.
Courage is powerful, talons sharp and firm. Courage is fragile, so easily shot from the sky. Courage is fast, easy to lose.
I met a man and his name was Mr. Lonely
How did I know? Because he told me
He kept asking me to make it stop
I asked him what he meant, but he said he couldn't tell me
Does that hurt, my King?
Life, with an ever
lasting sting? I said
I love you, but that
could change. When all I
want is you to range.
Emotions fill your
heart. It's never too
They see a monster, but I see perfection
He saw content, but I saw an injection
Where do I go when I need Protection?
Judgment sees bruises but I see affection
The stability of mother’s love-
may it cripple one so?
That withdrawn parallel, intimate she:
cause endless dream of a lover’s retreat.
I am nothing.
I feel as if I can do no good.
I am nothing.
I can never love another human being.
I am nothing.
They can never love me.
I am nothing.
Savor this sweet emotion,
Remember its taste,
Cherish the way it
Brushes against my heart
Like warm butter and silk,
The way it settles into the center
Of my stomach
And fills my hunger
Have you ever felt like running till you couldn’t run anymoreJust grabbing a bag and jetting out the doorBeing free and running wild with the windBeing a part of something that will never end
Honor body
spirit
and emotions
feel,
them then
watch them pass
Rushing
suppresses;
all spirits
are free
until they arrive
into
our bodies,
Love,
Where have you gone?
What have you done to me?
At first it was breathtaking, amazing, beautiful, like breaking dawn
Now it's deserted, lame, the game, has fallen.
timeflieswhenyou’rehavingfunbut
time
stops.
when you’re in love.
Everything else
chan-ges.
(promises fade)
….
the past rearranges.
I’m afraid,
To let people
See the tears roll uncontrollably
Down my face
Each one mimicking the last.
And, I don’t want
To have to face them
And show them that I feel.
Feeling a depth of despair inescapable,
an entangled mindweb is my dwelling
and my tongue tastes of bitter longing.
My body hard as a rock
so uncontrollable
My heart pounding like a drum
so unstoppable
My eyes rolling in swirls
so turnable
Blank page, blank stare, full pen
New day, new night, some problems
Same hate, same sad
Same place, my mind
My heart is swollen
About to pop, words unspoken
hurt it, make it infected
It's funny,
when people ask you if you're sad
and you just smile,
and say "no",
and they walk away, satisfied,
Thinking that they were mistaken
That they misread the moment
of pain,
depression,
Chiquitita I am sorry
That you are blue and black
That he’s taught you that all you have worth
Is your body
And that you think that you are dumb.
Chiquitita it’s alright to cry
Sitting on a stained dock
Amidst the four winds
Is the figure of a woman.
Have you seen her before?
Her dark locks lifeless
As her body sits frozen.
Her white dress stained
With red.
My heart has been used.
Torn, Hurt, and confused.
But yet, I stood for you love.
When you caused me pain,
And my anger I blamed,
You were all that I thought of.
Do you remember
Remember me
I remember you
Every moment
Every conversation
Every smile
Every dream
Every love
Every laugh
Every little
Everything
I remember
Overrated and complicated
It’s never what is seems
Never on the same page
I gave him everything
I always tend to bite off more than I can chew
Struggling to swallow and stick it through
The meal is always pleasing to the eye
But never quite leaves me satisfied
I can't see it, but I can see what it does.
It gets under your skin; it overflows your veins.
It dissects minds, sorting through your fears and your dreams.
Manipulating your decisions, poisoning your beliefs.
Always on my mind
Your presence never binds
As of lately I can't let go
Of these feelings,
so low
Zap away those neurons
That make your face appear
Very, extremely, and closely near
High.
High up I look down and see.
Really see.
See everything.
I feel so separate.
I am no longer a part of that.
Any of that.
I like it.
I love it.
I get to see.
BAMB! was that the door? I heard my heart thud in my chest.
my chest, so shaken up, my throat so hard to swollow.
clinching. my hands and teeth. just hearing the scream.
PLEASE STOP!
She sipping on some lean.
Popping all of them pills.
Smoking a bunch of weed.
While i just try to sit back and breath.
She said its just to much stress to leave.
And drugs separate her from realness.
it was the touch of your skin on mine
the way your lips moved like they knew me
as if they could have touched my darkest secret
Why was it that I could not look at you without smiling the rest of the day?
I would walk by the corridors gazing at the distance, seeing no one but you.
Your laugh, your smile, your voice, all charmed me.
It is passion for life that leads us to desperate actions.
It is rage that ignites our deprived minds.
It is lust that wields greed.
It is hatred who mentors war.
It is love who sacrifices willingly without regret.
I thought u were different from the rest. You really put my trust and patience to the test. Right beside you I said I'll always be. But instead you take advantage of me. My past is bad it makes me regress, but pushing through is the real test.
As we grew I watched you with ease,
A friendliness only siblings could share
But as you aged I watched that joy cease:
And in our friendship you seemed not to care.
In my maturity I saw your pain and flaws,
My hazy thoughts have done nothing
to solve this riddle.
Broken memories and strained eyes
forgetting the details.
If only I could slip back into
what I once was.
Simple life, joyful smiles,
there's a war inside me
raging and tearing
ripping and diseasing
every happy feeling i have.
there's a war inside me that,
even when i am asleep
continues to creep and crawl
Whenever my life
Faces challenges
One woman is always around
And when we didn't have nothing
She'll spend her last penny
Just to let me have something
I know one woman in my heart
How are you?
Is something wrong?
Are you upset?
All empty questions.
You don't care, you never have.
You see the hurt in my eyes, and you look away.
Bottle it up, plaster on a smile,
Focus on grace, focus on style.
If you have a disagreement, don't say it aloud,
For if you do, your friends will frown.
A lady does not whine or show her true feelings.
The yelling starts again
The tears begin to flow
The thing I'm beginning to
Need the most
Is ripped right from my hands
He can't see the hurt
Behind the cascading tears,
So I hide behind the music
Iran, when did you end up infected?
I never knew so far has spread,
This deadly plague,
Now your women shall suffer,
You shall have your share of screams,
More cries from more Mothers,
A girl walks alone.
A girl stands on her own.
Through the forest of the night.
Through the dessert with no light.
Forever alone, Forever searching.
But for what she will never know.
Do you see through my normal eyes to the sadness that lies within
Do you see my unholy spirit that always chooses to sin?
oh my oh my
my soul is on fire
what shall i do
when i am drowning in desire
i see your lips so full and lush
i imagine your stature so masculine
but not rough
when i see you oh my
Thoughts are feelings in your mind, conjured by emotions and reactions you feel inside.
No wait.
Thoughts are voices in your head that you keep from having a sound from your mouth
No wait
People come
People go
Seasons change
Emotions Unknown
Feelings you feel
No explanation
Your heart's desire
An unknown destination
A streak of red,
Anguish.
A splash of blue,
Tears.
Yellows and oranges blossom,
Bringing happiness.
Swirls of green
And black
Lurk
Eager to introduce
How we fight over nothing at all,
but when we do I watch my world fall
Apart, breaking at its seams.
Dying inside, choking back my screams.
My eyes swell up and my breathing gets shaky.
Bright smiles,
Dream eyes,
Wind blown hair,
Stomach butterflies;
Intertwined hands,
Never-let-go hugs,
Warmth of a kiss,
Oh, the effects of Love.
Depression is a deep trench
That goes on forever with no end
Pitch black and empty
Darkness for eternity
